He has Risen

Published March 31st, 2013 by Bobby Henderson


My friend Gooeld spotted this egg with an uncanny likeness to the FSM. 

Because it is Easter, I want to share a link to a debate on “Did Jesus Really Rise From The Dead?” between Michael Horner and Dan Barker.   Horner is Christian scholar and Barker is a reformed Christian preacher and now an atheist activist.  It is an engaging debate and I suspect no matter your beliefs you’ll find reading this time well spent.

Here’s the link:  Did Jesus Really Rise From The Dead?

73 Responses to “He has Risen”

  1. Bruce Mincks says:

    A good debate is based on sound definitions, and by skipping that discussion, the “fact” of Jesus’ resurrection gets confused with his status as someone “risen.” Risen from what? Perhaps from something material to something spiritual, from something temporal to something eternal. This is not a yes/no question, and insisting on evidence to prove its validity assumes there’s some kind of problem since there’s no kind of understanding. Without a definite difference in opinion, either argument fails as a consequence of any weak link in the reasoning.

    I believe there is something immortal in the Gospel’s story, but I also recognize a historical context must affect its truth according to a meaning without any extrinsic authority from either modern experts, the disciples, or Saint Paul. Their interpretations are only valid as they show the effects of Jesus’ life as much as his death; most notably, in the way that Saint John begins with an analogy between the Word of God and the Body of Christ (Greek logic and neoplastic mysticism, arguably). Was there ever such an exemplary life? Why must we worship his posthumous status, then? History has shed much blood and resisted any change in this problem, which is the fault of religion, not of Jesus.

    Conversely, a strictly semantic interpretation of the Gospels denies these players any imagination as the true and the fantastic aspects of this story are polarized for debate rather than reconciled for understanding. What does that phrase “I am that was” mean in the historical context of the crucifixion, and how does that resonate for a couple of in the true significance of these Gospels? Language evolves too, but that fact does not prove “Intelligent Design,” either. How can history be both the grounds of evolution in epochal time and the “weakest science” since Newton’s generation, presumably, for the nature of truth or spirit? Yet you demand “historical corroboration” before you allow any alternative approaches to history, having gutted the possibility for nature.

    • SillyKiwiMan says:

      Major problem: Outside the buybull there is zippo evidence for cheesus. Messiah figures are common to many religions, and christianiy pretty much ripped off the virgin birth thing from the Egyptians (Horus if memory serves correct).

      There are few facts associated with religion. They have a nasty habit of getting in the way of ludicrous claims.

      And nothing is immortal. (Except maybe the genius of Freddie Mercury)


  2. Concerned Citizen says:


  3. anderson says:


  4. TheFewTheProudTheMarinara says:

    You know how Jesus is god’s “only begotten son”? Well, scientists now figure there are tens of billions of earth-like planets in our galaxy alone, and there are tens of billions of galaxies, so… the following possibilities exist:

    1. Ours is the only planet with intelligent life. Highly unlikely, especially given most of the trolls who visit us.
    2. God’s saviors to all other races were daughters.
    3. Humans are the scum of the universe; the only ones who needed saving.
    4. The Buybull is full of crap.
    5. There were no saviors.
    6. There is no god.

    I vote for numbers 3 through 5. Our Noodly Lord is proof of number 6.

    • Keith says:

      There is another interpretation: All of god’s other sons were not begotten but arose through binary fission or spontaneous generation. Since spontaneous generation has not been considered a valid hypothesis for 400 years god may be an amoeba.

      • TheFewTheProudTheMarinara says:

        Thanks, Keith! I knew there must be some other method. If not, it would prove the BuyBull was not inspired by an all-knowing god, but the product of Bronze-age man, who didn’t know the true nature of the universe, the world, or even himself!

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    • Bill T. says:

      Pray to his noodliness, turn around three times, blink your eyes, prepare a sacrifice of boiled noodles, cover with sauce and consume, and do a web search. Ramen

  7. Connie says:

    You people are nutsy kookoo.

    • Rev. Wulff says:


      • Pete Byrdie says:

        There need be no “so”. Some people just pay compliments to brighten others’ days.

    • SillyKiwiMan says:

      As opposed to people believing in a stick zombie who’s his own daddy? Or 72 virgins being a reward (I want three well-trained hookers)? Or multi-armed elephant headed thingies?

      We’re the same, we just believe in one less god than you do (apart from, of course, his Holy Noodliness).

    • Captain Birdseye says:

      Connie. You made contact with the only sane religion. Please give your reasons for judging it as insane? Two thousand years ago, people said exactly the same thing. What’s changed? I like Jesus, I just don’t like what Christians did to a peace-loving hippy.

      Remember, when you next serve pasta to your children, mention that you have just Baptised them to FSM: they’ll love it. Perhaps that’s the problem?


    • Keith says:

      You are wrong Connie. We can’t all have the same name.

  8. http://Verascakes.com/ says:

    It doesn’t matter if you’re trying to save your relationship after
    cheating, stop a divorce, or you just want to get your ex back.
    his comic roles in movies like Hungama, Waqt: The Race against Time,
    Malamaal. He represented his homeland in four Olympics and is a three-time indoor world champ in the 1500 meters.

    • Keith says:

      So he (whoever he is) was a 1500 metre indoor Olympic comedian?

    • The Reverend Toni Rigatoni says:

      So Vera, you come here trying to tempt us with cake? However it has been tried before, it has already been established that the cake is a lie!

      Nevertheless, may the (chocolate) Sauce be with you.

      The Reverend

      • Atsap Revol says:

        Rev, doesn’t chocolate sauce go with another religion (i.e. The Church of the Farting Chocolate Dude)? We haven’t had an input from the Dude for a while. We assume He is still blessing his followers with his fragrant flatulence in the neighborhood of Hershey, Pennsylvania.

        • The Reverend Toni Rigatoni says:

          Hi Atsap, you make a good piont there, but I feel that a small reference to a lesser god only serves to illustrate the superiority of our own. After all is said and done the puddingy sweetness of the FCD will only ever follow the main dish, our very own savoury saviour the FSM. To further illustrate the superiority of His Noodlyness to those among the heathen hordes who may not share our convictions, I ask them to consider the following. In the same way that being accepted before the FCD demonstrates the FSM’s precedence over this minor deity, we also find that being chronologically AFTER the Antipasti shows that the FSM has superseded him/she/it, thereby demonstrating the FSM’s superiority over them both. This may seem on the face of it to be a contradiction but it isn’t. I of course can’t prove this but nobody can disprove it so that proves it. So, if anyone disagrees remember this; this is religion, I am a Minister and as such I claim knowledge that is otherwise unknowable and my standpoint is unassailable and above criticism.

          May the Sauce be with you,

          The Reverend.

        • Atsap Revol says:

          Reverend Toni, bless you for pionting out the error in my thoughts on the FCD. As you know from my cryptic nom-de-plum, I am a devout PASTA LOVER. As always, your clear analysis cuts straight through the marinara to the meatballs.

          Thanks to my grandson, I now hold the same appiontment to the CoFSM Clergy that you have. On my 81st Birthday my grandson presented me with a framed Certificate of Ordination as a Minister in the Blessed Church of The Flying Spaghetti Monster. I’m now available for exorcisms, circumcisions, baptisms etc. (Or am I confusing Our Holy Mother Church’s dogma with the incantations of other minor religious orders?)

          I especially liked your brilliant analytical train of reasoning: “Of course I can’t prove this but nobody can disprove it so that proves it.” As usual your standpiont is unassailable and above criticism. It’s good to be a member of the clergy!

          May you be Sauced in the Holy Marinara.
          Reverend Atsap Revol

        • The Reverend Toni Rigatoni says:

          Thank you for your kind words Atsap. May I welcome you to the clergy and say how pleased I am hear of your ordination; your long and tireless campaigning for the cause puts you in a supreme position to mentor new and indeed all Pastafarians, as you unknowingly did, and do for me. May I take this opportunity to say how proud I am to stand shoulder to shoulder with you and other like minded people, ordained or not, in the seemingly endless fight for rational thought and a secular society.

          I can’t end without acknowledging all the fine folks here at the CoFSM for their part in this crusade, Reverend Wulff, Drained, TFTPTM, Keith and many others to numerous to mention, you know who you are. Once again I say how proud I am to be a part of the fight, and a fight it is, a fight that will be won. It’s almost certain that we will not see the victory ourselves but it it is our duty, both here at our church but even more importantly, in our daily lives, to inspire those that follow to take up the challenge and continue when we can no longer do so and have retired to the beer volcano, perhaps even taking some comfort in the thought that we may have played some small part in ridding the world of childish superstition.

          May the FSM bless you all.

          The Reverend

        • Captain Birdseye says:

          Monsignor Atsap Revol. I briefly researched ecclesiastical titles and, to my surprise, I discovered that Primate is indeed one of them. Should you aspire to that rank, I suggest it is available and may I have the dubious honour of proposing it? Aaaaarghhhh….

        • Atsap Revol says:

          Learning something new every day! The title Primate carries a little baggage through the non-ecclesiastical definition, so I prefer the title Prelate. Pope, Primate, Prelate, Pastor, Pedophile, it’s all very confusing. But thanks for your observation and offer of a distinguished title, Captain Birdseye.


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