You will never have a pirate ship they cost millions moron (hate-mail)

Published June 5th, 2011 by Bobby Henderson

You are a fraud. It’s obvious to me that you don’t give a shit about you’re so-called religion. I am not even that christian but this site makes me sick. you have no right to start a religion or should i say cult.  People need to think for themselves they dont need to listen to your nonsense. I am not even that christian but at least they are trying to help people. What are you trying to do? make money and buy a pirate ship and fill it with strippers and beer?  That is the most stupid thing I ever heard. I hope the government shuts you down and takes you’re money. You will never have a pirate ship they cost millions moron.

Suck it,


1,437 Responses to “You will never have a pirate ship they cost millions moron (hate-mail)”

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  1. Antoniabologna says:

    Why can’t people who write in, at least write something intelligible? Boats don’t usually cost millions. A pirate ship could easily be made to order for less than a million. Geez.

  2. Oatz says:

    I have to take exception to at least one comment here:
    My last a pirate ship only only cost 1600 gold dubloons (1.2 million 2011 USD) and it this was top of the line:
    – Mohogany beers casks
    – 5 star stripper quarters
    – Gold plated cannons
    – Depleted uranium cannon balls
    – Baby seal tear sprinklers
    – Teak gang plank with hydraulic extender and wifi remote, ya there’s an app for that!

    My pirate ship dealer clearly stated “Ye never find a ship fairer then she YARRRRRRR!”

  3. Vincent says:

    This verbal defecation is not even worth a proper comment, but I will leave one out of respect. The grammar and spelling errors are enough to give a freshman in high school who is failing basic English a stroke, let alone the failure to think before vomiting on a keyboard and calling it a letter. I will say, however, that the creators of Pastafarianism have every right to create a new religion. People have done so for millennia. Case in point, Christianity. It is essentially a cult, following every word that supposedly came from the mouth of a MAN who claimed he was the son of god, much like the Branch Davidian’s leader or Jim Jones, though they did some horrible things, so in that respect they are unalike. But, the fact remains, everyone has the right to their beliefs as long as no one is hurt by them.

    Pastafrians are not hurting you, so you ought to just let them go on their merry way. I suggest turning your focus to the religio-crazies in the southern states who want to shove creationism down the throats of our children in public school in the place of science.

  4. Bob Loblaw says:

    “I’m not even that[sic] christian”

    Huh? Well then, which christian ARE you?

    Or is this like saying “I’m not even that pregnant”?

    • TheFewTheProudTheMarinara says:

      I think this degree of faith is probably true for many, Bob. They don’t even want to think about how screwy their faith is, but lack the courage to swim against the stream.

  5. BigbonedP from OZ says:

    Are we really buying a Pirate ship?

    COOL !!!

    I offer to catch fish off it’s mighty decks for the crew to eat.

    • Jim Farey says:

      In all seriousness – and I can’t really comment on the above hodgepodge of a letter – if we (the Pastafarian congregation) are buying a pirate ship, I would like to offer my services working on it in exchange for getting to holiday on it each year.


  6. janelle says:

    Thanks Mike! I do suck! I do prefer to suck my noodles, rather than cut them up into tiny pieces.

  7. mingqiao says:

    ummm… *your?

  8. Apprentice Frederic says:

    Speaking of millions, and speaking of helping people, it’s worth noting that Kiva Team FSM is pretty close to $1M, per Bobby’s last post. You’re (<–note example of correct usage) the moron, Mikey.

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