This is a real religion?

Published March 13th, 2011 by Bobby Henderson

The government actually passed this BS as religion? You just did this so you can get tax cuts, your religion is based on christian hate because thats all i see you mocking on here, You might as well side with the church of satan who mocks their own belief, Just because youre too blind to be enlightened you have decided to scam all the atheists out there, in a way i have to side with you, because all of your followers are just as stupid as you are, nobody ever looks into history, philosophy or multiple religions before basing their faith, they always just side with hate and disbelief, when love is just the true meaning behind every religion, and science is formulated from the start of religion, it seems that your church and your followers will all go down the same stupid path, even if you are a teacher or a doctor you probably are a bad one at that, well except the church leader who is rolling in money from his t-shirts and probably initiation fees and getting tax cuts, what a smart way to scam atheist church goers, you might as well start the next jonestown massacre.


621 Responses to “This is a real religion?”

  1. Duke Airanda Tension says:

    Wow, two in a row, is it Dembski time again in the USA?
    RAmen all
    Duke Aireanda Tension

    “That which can be asserted without evidence, can be dismissed without evidence.”
    — Christopher Hitchens

  2. Duke Airanda Tension says:

    Just one other quick point, if not for the Xtian dark ages (approx 1000 years where science was discouraged in the western world) what could the human race have achieved by now? Consider the progress made in the USA, from the first powered flight to walking on the moon in 66 years and remember the fate of Gallileo, locked up for proving the earth was not the centre of the universe.

    Duke Aireanda Tension

    “We are all atheists about most of the gods that societies have ever believed in. Some of us just go one god further.”
    — Richard Dawkins

    • Brian Fritzen says:

      On topic: The first episode of season 8 (I believe) in Family Guy, Stewie and Brian go to a dimension where Jesus wasn’t born. Everything is clean and bright and beautiful and there are flying cars and “poo removal.” All because of a lack of dark ages.

      This is certainly the brightest point.

      Luckily, history will be based on what the written word says, and while chat rooms and forums are filled with tedium, it will be the published word that will clue them in. And most of the published (peer reviewed work) tends to shine quite a bright light on where we are now and where we are going.

    • Peter says:

      Also, we would be far more advanced if some stupid christian monk hadn’t gone and written all over Archimedes’ writings. Like, we would be able to travel to other stars, that’s how advanced we could be.

  3. Kindra says:

    Who’s to say this religion is any better than your religion? For all you know, your religion is completely made up. Every belief is here say. While there is proof to back up some of the historical facts in the bible, there is no science to prove that there was any form of a god on this earth at any time. So, using the “Christian logic” that “just because you don’t see it doesn’t mean it isn’t there”, there very well could be a flying spaghetti monster.. If nothing else, he would sure be a lot tastier than “jesus”! ;)

    • Keith says:

      Gets back to the chocolate teapot argument, doesn’t it?

      • theFewtheProudtheMarinara says:

        That’s right, Keith. We know that mountains, trees and midgets exist. Not so for the Garden of Eden, Adam or Eve. And certainly not talking snakes.

        • gordon_uk says:

          And amusingly in Cockney rhyming slang saying ‘I don’t Adam and Eve it’ means I don’t believe it

  4. RB says:

    I’ve never really met a ‘good’ Christian, and it looks like there is no danger in that happening any time soon.

    No government consent is needed to create a religion; all that is needed is the faith of people. I am guessing you’re putting yourself forward as Christian, though you didn’t actually make any direct references there, Kelli certainly is a one of those poor Christians I mentioned. When Christianity came into being it was not approved of by the governments of the day, the fish symbol for Christianity is proof of that, as it was used as a shibboleth or sorts in the early days. What it means to be a Christian anymore is far from what a Christian should be, and this is proof of that. The Crusades, the Inquisitions, the faith which has as its second highest command to love all others as if they were themselves has caused so much hate over the years. It’s been some time since I have read the bible as christians like you have shaken my faith, I could go on but I’ll leave you with this:

    Luke 10:25-37, Acts of the Apostles 17:11 and Matthew 7:5, Luke 6:32, 1 Corinthians 11:31, 2 Corinthians 13:5

  5. Trevor says:

    Lol. There are no Pastafarian churches, as the Flying Spaghetti Monster wishes. So how would we get property tax cuts if we don’t have churches?

    • Insightful Ape says:

      This is our church right here. Not all churches have to be built of brick and mortar. On the other hand if we could a tax break for contributing to our church that would be nice. And maybe one day we could demand that our creation story be given equal time in schools. Which is the whole idea behind our religion.

      • Keith says:

        It’s not a creation story, it’s the truth.

  6. Ubi Dubium says:

    How can you get tax cuts on a Pirate Ship? I think those don’t pay any property taxes anyway, pretty much by definition.

    Now what I really want is one of those tax-free housing allowances that the clergy can get in the US!

    • Thomas L. Nielsen says:

      When Pyrates* talk about tax “cuts”, they mean it quite litteraly (hint: cutlasses are involved).

      Regards & all, and rAmen,

      Thomas L. Nielsen

      *) Please note that I have taken to deliberately using this spelling, to differentiate our Profets, the true Pyrates, from the base pretenders, the pirates. The former, being the True Pyrates, as exemplified by Errol Flynn or Geena Davis, are swashbuckling, twinkly-eyed, saves-the-day Masters of the Oceans, and must be clearly differentiated from the latter, who are just thugs with boats. In fact, historically, the pirates operating in the Caribbean and elsewhere back in the Golden Age of piracy pretty much made the present-day pirates off the coast of Africa look like a bunch of politically correct choirboys. And yes, I’m perfectly well aware that True Pyrates never in fact existed, but believing in made-up personages in the face of contrary evidence is what religion is all about, isn’t it?

      • Brian Fritzen says:

        And here you totally forgot Pyrat Rum! Blasphemy!


        • Keith says:

          Perhaps he only drinks Pirate Beer. In that respect it would be a sin of omission rather than blasphemy.

        • Thomas L. Nielsen says:

          I bow my head in shame…….not only did I miss-spell “literally”, but Pyrate Rum XO Reserve is actually one of my favourites. And I forgot about it *SOB*

          I will pray to the Holy FSM and ask for forgiveness for my blasphemous heresy. I will also do penance by deliberately NOT drinking Pyrate Rum XO Reserve tonight.

          Regards & all, and rAmen,

          Thomas L. Nielsen

          PS: Never heard of or seen Pirate Beer. Good?

        • Keith says:

          Re Pirate Beer: I have no idea if it exists. If it doesn’t, it should.

        • Thomas L. Nielsen says:

          Re. Pirate Beer:

          Ahoy mateys, thar she blows: http://www.thinkgeek.com/interests/giftsforhim/c2ad/

          Even reported to prevent scurvy

          Regards & all, and rAmen,

          Thomas L. Nielsen

        • Danimal says:

          One of the best beers I’ve every had, and it’s right next door to you Thomas.

        • Thomas L. Nielsen says:

          I haven’t checked Ye Olde Google Mappe, but are there any rivers near Ertvelde (where the brewery is located)? Specifically any rivers large enough to accomodate a medium-size Pyrate sloop? Or failing that, a largish Viking longboat?

          Regards & all,

          Thomas L. Nielsen
          Luxembourg (expat Dane)

          PS: Aarrrr, mateys, here be Ye Olde Planne of Action:
          1. Land Pyrate sloop (or Viking longboat) near Ertvelde (nearby body of water to be confirmed). Post sentry.
          2. Approach Brouwerij Van Steenberge using stealth and cunning.
          3. Enter Brouwerij Van Steenberge, grabbing any Piraat Ale and good-looking wenches (or good-looking lads, if that be more to your liking) on the premises.
          4. Return to Pyrate sloop (or Viking longboat) with loot (and booty).
          5. Pyrates (or Vikings) Exit Stage Left, singing bawdy Pyrate (or Viking) songs, drinking Piraat Ale and Pyrat Rum, making merry, etc., etc.
          Any questions?

        • Jakob says:

          Thomas l. Nielsen

          you write luxembourg after your name but are you by any chance Danish. your name suond a lot like it.

        • Thomas L. Nielsen says:

          To Jakob:

          I am indeed. I was expated to Luxembourg in September of 2009.

          RegArrrds & all, and rAmen

          Thomas L. Nielsen

  7. Dave says:

    “science is formulated from the start of religion”
    No, you got that backwards…
    Religion is formulated from the start of science. Religion was created because (one of the many reasons…) man cannot stand the “I don’t know” approach. Science had too many questions, so out of our own ignorance we created god. Not the other way around. God should be worshiping US since We created him/her/it!
    Just like Bill O’Rielly – “The tides are proof of god cause I am too stupid to know how they work…”

    • Danimal says:

      Best. O’Rielly. Quote. Ever.

    • JamesL says:

      Fuckin’ tides, how do they work?

      • TiltedHorizon says:

        Don’t know, can’t explain it, must his noodly appendage.

      • Rev Toni Rigatoni says:

        Easy, the tide comes in – the tide goes out, never a mis-communication, don’t understand how you be so ignorant of the facts!

      • JamesL says:

        But I don’t want to talk to a scientist! Y’all motherfuckers lyin’ and gettin’ me pissed. (hint, google up fuckin’ magnets)

      • theFewtheProudtheMarinara says:

        I understand how the tides work. What I can’t understand is how Bill O’Rielly manages enough brain power to allow breathing and walking at the same time.

        • wulff says:

          Have we ever seen him do both?

  8. Cola says:

    Please give this a thumbs up if you were a Christian who converted to Pastafarianism. I’m curious.

    • Rev Toni Rigatoni says:

      It really depends on how you interpret your meaning of christian. I am technically a christian as CofE was put on my birth certificate by my parents when I was born as it was, and still is I believe, routine to include the ‘child’s’ religion on the certificate(that’s another whole kettle of fish), but I have never been to church other than for weddings and funerals. I did go to sunday school at my parent’s behest but even at that very young age I couldn’t reconcile the ‘one loving god’ and the vengeful sadist we were told of, and my then somewhat limited world view was, even then, at odds with what I was being taught. Sunday school soon fell by the wayside as did any notion of god i might have been nurturing; I think I still believed in Santa Claus long after i had dismissed god as an anachronism and an irrelevance. In that respect I would expect a large number of thumbs up to your post, what would be really interesting is how many of the hateful bile spewing fundies that post here become Pastafarians; I suspect the numbers in that case would be very small indeed.
      Of course, if you meant how many christians as opposed to other members of other religions become Pastafarians then just ignore me!

      Sauce be with you,
      The Reverend

    • Zuri says:

      I never actually “converted” to Pastafarianism, I’m just a freethinking Christian. I know, that doesn’t make sense, but I can’t call myself an athiest quite yet. (A lot of that has to do with me still living with my Christian parents.)

      • TiltedHorizon says:

        Good for you Zuri.

        In my humble opinion, the term ‘freethinking’ can still be applied to ‘Christian’. Freethinking, or freethought, is not exclusive to Atheism, it comes from a willingness to challenge what is presented to you. A realization that any notion should be should be tested scientifically and logically, using reason and an open mind. In regards to you, it means you have taken back control of what you choose to believe without being influenced by tradition, dogma or the church. I know hoards of Christians and Muslims who are freethinkers (I married one); they still believe in god and still lead good lives. They just don’t subscribe to old world dogmas which have little to no place in modern society.

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