Are you a retard?

Published February 3rd, 2011 by Bobby Henderson

I saw your retarded website and asked myself "why?" but then, there are a lot of crackheads in the world, and you seem to be one of the more insane ones. That is a joke website, right? Can you honestly tell yourself that you truly believe in this load of shit? Pasta is an inanimate food object. It cannot fly. It does not have eyes. It never was and never will be alive and breathing. For your own health, I ask you to stop whatever the hell you’re smoking.


444 Responses to “Are you a retard?”

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  1. the noodle whisperer says:

    It is said that his noodliness commanded the first man to make food out of wheat,rice etc in his image.
    However many people ignore that it was commanded to be of his image and not of him.
    In the same sense that other religions say that god created man in his image.
    If we follow their way of thinking we could then assume that we are god.
    This is incorrect so it makes perfect sense that pasta cannot fly or breathe or do any thing else besides being consumed.
    It is just food created in his image

  2. Praise and Glory to the FSM, Now Pass the BEER Mate! says:

    I love how Christians have such funny beliefs…..did you know that in the older versions of the bible that the “virgin” Mary wasn’t a virgin? It was a big-ass translation error!

    • nun sequitur says:

      well, technically any1 born into this world with employment of petri dish &/or syringe, the ‘vessel’ carrying the child would technically have comitted no ‘sin’; & to imply anyone raped carrying child is a ‘sinner’, well, this devaluing of women ranks right up there on insensitivity list with the likes of this letter writer.

      having worked in the health field i have cared for people categorized all sorts of ways as we humans are so fond of applying labels, do firmly feel they had way more to contribute, said as much in another reply, but it bears repetition. . .incase it was missed.

  3. theFewtheProudtheMarinara says:

    spf, your god is severely limited, isn’t he?
    Eyes implies a limited reange of vision, and flying implies your god
    can’t travel instantaneously, like the FSM.

    P.S. Does spf stand for sad, pathetic fool?

  4. bourikii says:

    this guy is delusional there’s no way a crackhead would spend money for a computer, he would need it for his crack

  5. nun sequitur says:

    i lost count of the number of insensitive baseless devaluations of your fellow humans…i count u among, even tho u clearly have zero respect nor tolerance for those around you whom you define in the manner you have. personally, id sooner have the company of a yone
    you so describe, over yourself, because from certain standpoints, they would b more evolved than you with your clear demonstration of moral terpitude. if you do not evolve or get a clue, i hope u will find it in u 2 refrain from sharing such drivel in the future & @ very least, suggest, do not kiss your mom with that mouth nor touch another living soul with typing digits.

    • nun sequitur says:

      typo. anyone.

  6. nun sequitur says:

    shit actually has more to contribute( than this letter bears out you may); it can b used as fertilizer.

  7. nun sequitur says:

    aside, i think this letter writer may be our neighbor 3 doors down, he has said similar things, 2 us…the effort seems associated with attempts 2 have us repeat any of the content, back, so that we end up being the spotlight…otherwise i find it difficult 2 believe this level of insensitivity really exists (tho, probably know better…& scary that it does)?

    • nun sequitur says:

      & hard 2 say whom signed us up 4 all the invites 2 area church we got in the mail, but now they r showing up in the sunday newspaper….as an insert. they used 2 get sent 2 our house. This areas paranormal society does investigations of hauntings & even televised efforts. maybe someone can start a normal society & have all this tracking & pursuing halted, it is not unlike being haunted…i would almost prefer the paranormal variety, but only almost…

  8. Lantis says:

    Pasta never was alive, huh? What rocks and dirt do you make your pasta out of? It’s no wonder you can’t understand his noodly goodness, you make your pasta all wrong!

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