Kentucky’s Ark Encounter

Published December 7th, 2010 by Bobby Henderson


The New York Times reports:

the state of Kentucky The state has promised generous tax incentives to a group of entrepreneurs who plan to construct a full-size replica of Noah’s ark, load it with animals and actors, and make it the centerpiece of a Bible-based tourist attraction called Ark Encounter.

Since Gov. Steven L. Beshear announced the plan on Wednesday, some constitutional experts have raised alarms over whether government backing for an enterprise that promotes religion violates the First Amendment’s requirement of separation of church and state. But Mr. Beshear, a Democrat, said the arrangement posed no constitutional problem, and brushed off questions about his stand on creationism.

“The people of Kentucky didn’t elect me governor to debate religion,” he said at a news conference. “They elected me governor to create jobs.”

Gov Beshear, you can expect the Church of Flying Spaghetti Monster theme park submission soon.  

141 Responses to “Kentucky’s Ark Encounter”

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  1. Andrew Hall says:

    That is crazy! Has anyone actually read the Ark story lately? It starts out with angels having sex with mortal women. I did a bit on it, Angel Sex and the Noah’s Ark Theme Park.

    • theFewtheProudtheMarinara says:

      That was no angel, ladies. It was me in my younger days. I can understand your confusion!

  2. Jason says:

    This proposed park has nothing for The Flying Spaghetti Monster Theme Park!

    Vendors selling various pasta, meatball tasting stands…
    Highlight of the park will be the beer volcano!
    Don’t forget “Noodly Appendage — The Ride!”
    There is a marinara slide, and you can swim with the spaghetti noodles.
    There are show’s with midgets! There are show’s with pirates!
    Don’t for get the room of blessing – where you too can be touched by his noodly appendage!


    • Kishi says:

      Don’t forget the full size pirate galleon that will fire off cannons stuffed full of delicious candy.

      And can there be a show with midget pirates? That would be awesome.

      Will the park sell bucket hats so that the brethren can capture some of the beer from the volcano? It would be a fun addition I think. And maybe there could be a smaller root beer volcano for the kiddies?

      Before you know it all we’ll need is space and funding to get the thing going. :D (I’d visit. Heck, I’d buy a season pass!)

      • StJason says:

        Hell, I’d *live* there!

      • Adam says:

        Why is everyone forgetting the stripper factory? While everyone is distracted by midget pirates… Where did dad go?

        • opiesysco says:

          Hellz yeah!
          All we need is the beer volcano and strippers.
          As long as His Noodliness (May sauce be upon Him) is keeping an eye on us, what could go wrong?

  3. Lala says:

    I live in Kentucky and at first I was totally disgusted by this idea. Then I started thinking about it and came to the conclusion that the state would not be giving them money if they weren’t getting something in return like property tax,etc. I am all for taking the money of morons and possibly putting it into something useful. I can drive my happy atheist ass down streets paid for by these Christians.

    • Crystal says:

      However, religious organizations are tax exempt. The liklihood of anyone actually paying taxes is slim. Currently, there is a court case testing the constitutionality of priests being able to add swimming pools, hot tubs, and the like without out having to pay increased property taxes like everyone else in the US does (increases the value of the property so property taxes increase).

      • opiesysco says:

        Hot tubs and pools?? Is that for the little boys they entertain?

  4. Ande says:

    I hope they hire an engineer to, not only find out exactly how big a full-size replica of the ark needs to be, but also how to make it seaworthy using only tools and labour available. If they also provided a credible plan to gather all the animals I would gladly pay a visit

    • Dr. Astronomer says:

      I think it would be a great experiment. Life size, real time ark. We seal 8 people in it with 2 (or 7) of every animal (they’ll all fit right?) and see how they do. It’d be like Biosphere (that worked right?).

      • opiesysco says:

        As long as they talk to the dirt eating snakes, they should be ok.

    • plumberbob says:

      Here’s a fun article, fully referenced, that shows the physical impossibility of the construction and seaworthiness of the ark.


      Nothing more needs to be said.


  5. Pete Drum says:

    One of you geniuses please parse this, and show me where it talks in any way about “separation of church and state”.

    Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.

    • Kris says:

      Geniuses dont argue with people who ask stupid questions just to initiate an argument. :)

    • tekhedd says:

      Funny, I was *easily* able to figure out exactly how it clearly defines a separation of church and state, without even using a dictionary.

      Back in the 80s they taught American History in the schools. Heck, when I was in school there was even a class called “Democracy”. Government power is a bad thing. Taxation is the strongest power the government has. Using tax breaks and tax money to promote religion, well… taxation without representation could be considered *the* reason the USA is an independent country. But surely every American knows this. And any patriot respects it.


    • Insightful Ape says:

      Well there was one genius (and I mean that quite literally) who thought that was exactly what it meant.
      And it happened to be the guy wrote it in the first place.
      Guy by the name Thomas Jefferson.

    • Jamie says:

      Easy. “Congress shall make no law *respecting* an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof” means that government must treat all religions equally. If we use the example of public prayers, that means that the government can’t just have a Christian prayer because that’s favoring it above other religions. The two choices are to have a prayer for each religion practiced in the U.S. or have no publicly led prayer at all (keeping everyone equal because no religious prayer is said over others). If there were no separation of church and state, then there’d be argument over which religion should be favored. Also when one religion is endorsed by the government, and we did have public (Christian) prayer, that would infringe on the rights of those that don’t pray, or don’t pray that way (either Muslim, Hindu, Buddhist, or some other denomination of Christianity). Do you see where things would get messy and how the “separation of church and state” helps us avoid that mess?

      The other part of that quote means that government can’t stop people from practicing their religion either, which seems to be what most theists focus on. They like to argue that banning public prayer is infringing on people’s right to practice their religion. They’re wrong; it only bans prayer led by government officials/representatives. People are free to *privately* pray on their own. So people can practice their religion but government can’t endorse any one of them. So at some public government event, an individual citizen can pray, even the government official, but they must do it privately without forcing everyone else to follow them.

    • Atsap Revol says:

      Some ask:” Where in the U.S.Constitution does it say the phrase “Separation of Church and State?” The implication is that if it doesn’t explicitly say it in the text then it isn’t so. Where in the Constitution is the word “Democracy?” It’s not there. Does that mean we are not a democracy? Of course it doesn’t. Democracy, like Separation, is not specifically named but is built into the very fabric of the Constitution. Because the Constitution provides for an elected government, we are a democracy. And because the Founders provided no role for religion in government, there is no role for religion in government. Thus we have our Constitution as a barrier between civilized people and the return of the Inquisition.

  6. StJason says:

    Not sure, but looking at the artwork above, the Ark they are building is considerably bigger then the biblical measurements. 30 cubits high ~ 45′. From the looks of the buildings around the ark in the picture is more like double that. Not sure about length, but it looks long too.

    • Keith says:

      Perhaps the surrounding architecture is designed for midgits (sic).

  7. Mariner says:

    >>>journey through the old testament

    Does that mean god is gonna come down and smite them for worshiping false idols? I sure hope so.

    • Cheese says:

      Seconded. Motion carries.

  8. Danimal says:


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