When you have 3.6 Billion adherents

Published November 27th, 2010 by Bobby Henderson

When you have 3.6 Billion adherents to your faith, we can start talking about teaching your ideas in school. When you think you’re right or not the decision on whether or not to teach creationism in school should come from the majority and the fact is 82.3% of Americans are christian and therefore believe that the earth was created by God and only 11.6 are unaffiliated with a religion, of which only a fraction are atheist or agnostic. Take out the agnostics because if they’re really agnostic they won’t care what’s being taught in school, and we’re talking about a small number of really loud people that are trying to force their beliefs on the rest of the country. How messed up is that. I’m not going to force my beliefs on you. I think that’s why they did the whole separation of church and state thing, so that a certain belief system, Evolution included, would not be forced upon the population. So teach evolution, go ahead, I know for a fact that Brigham Young University and Brigham Young University Idaho, two christian schools teach evolution in their required classes, but if you’re going to teach one THEORY, and I emphasize theory not fact, then give credence to other theories that bare any social impact on our society. Like how about a theory that more than 50% of the world subscribes to? Anyway, peace be the journey, I give you credit for some funny stuff, like pirates and global warming, but don’t pretend to take nothing seriously if you actually do have very serious agenda.

All religions go through a phase of perceived fakeness. Funny you bring up BYU.  Mormonism got a lot of criticism for years because Joseph Smith used seer stones to find the location of their original scriptures and translate them from unknown languages.  Some might say that sounds like BS.  But with time and pressure it becomes a religion.  Not unlike the formation of rocks.  I am a scientist first, remember.

506 Responses to “When you have 3.6 Billion adherents”

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  1. Patrick says:

    I think most people hit this perfectly in comments but one criticism seems to be left out: evolution as a belief. You cannot believe in evolution, it requires no faith. It is testable theory. For example, I do not believe in the theory of relativity, I accept it. So please, do not say, “I believe in evolution.” By saying that one places evolution in the same realm as religion. Creationism by the FSM or by what you may call God are wholly dissimilar than a theory Jordan.

  2. Bigslicka says:

    Can we not take the teachings of the christ (yes lower case letters is correct) without needing to belive he was a real being. I mean, come on he was saying the same shit a lot of others were saying long before he was “alive”.

    • Rev Toni Rigatoni says:

      Well said; but-was it Ghandi that said ‘I like your christ but not your christians’? The teachings of christ reflect the standards of any reasonable, decent person, a code by which to live; one by which I live as a choice, as do the majority of secularists I suspect, not from the fear of god or the dogmatic following of ‘rules’ (one could almost certainly make an argument that those that need to be told to be moral are not really moral at all). I personally don’t have a problem with new testament philosophy; maybe not even have a problem with christ if he existed, but rather with the dogmatic religious types (note: not neccesarily just christians) that won’t accept that fact and belief/faith are mutually exclusive, those that accuse me of being without morals because I am without god, those that use god as an excuse to murder and to persecute those that don’t agree with them, those that come to this site and curse and swear at us and damn us to hell in the name of their loving and forgiving god, those in positions of power that make decisions that directly affect me and my children and my grandchildren and many other millions, based on their superstitious dogmatic rubbish and those that want their superstitious nonsense taught as scientific fact to our children. The christ of the new testament was pretty cool, if only christians could be more christ-like.

      Sauce be with you

      The Reverend.

      • Noodlity says:

        Rev Toni Rigatoni says:
        “The christ of the new testament was pretty cool, if only christians could be more christ-like.”

        For a time, I also thought like that. Then it hit me that no matter what he spoke of (which could have easily been added later, in the gospels) , what he actually *did* was not much different from what other cult leaders do, even nowadays – gather a bunch of followers, spew fables, parables, and generic buzzwords at them in attempt to sound meaningful, and maybe perform a parlour trick or two.

        Ultimately, he contested the local clergy and authorities, got in trouble for it, and got rejected by the general population, most of his own former followers included, when he was no longer interesting. The only reason we ever even heard of him, was that emperor Constantine’s wife was a member of his particular sect (rather, what was left of it) , and he decided to force it on his people for a fresh start.

        The Dead Sea scrolls tell of at least a dozen messiahs, saviors, any one of which would have served the same purpose. Ol’ Yeshua here – he just got lucky. And I just don’t consider pure luck a good enough reason for someone to be worthy of respect.

        • B. says:

          What you are really saying is that Christians were in minority and, by Jordan’s logic, shouldn’t force their beliefs on the majority. No religion should by that logic ever have existed, since every religion starts small and then gain in numbers.

        • Dr. Astronomer says:

          To think what could have been had Mrs. Constantine been a Pastafarian!


        • Rev Toni Rigatoni says:

          I take your point totaly Noodlity and agree with you unreservedly, I wasn’t in any way trying to justify the biblical or the christian view of christ as a saviour or supernatural power nor any of the other BS that surounds the character. I take the view that the figure refered to as Jesus is probably an amalgum of the many preachers that almost certainly abounded at the time, and if he did exist he was no more than one of the same. The point I was trying to make in response to Bigslicka’s post was that we, or at least most of us do accept the ‘teachings of christ’ but see them as having nothing to do with christ but deriving from our own morality and the laws of man that, themselves are too derived from our own moral code. I acknowledge that many laws have been made in the past in response to biblical dictates (sunday trading, pub opening hours etc.) but gladly most have been removed from the statute here in the UK, or are treated as a quaint throughback from an earlier, less enlightened age, and generally ignored. The quote you mined from my post was my obviously poor attempt at being clever whilst trying to say that christians should practice what they and their christ preach.

          Sauce be with you

          The Reverend

        • Noodlity says:

          Well, I’m glad we’re at an agreement with the Reverend. I have nothing to add.

          Except maybe…


          The presence of Santa in soft drink ads means that the holiday season has begun!

  3. Theo says:

    “In the sciences, a scientific theory comprises a collection of concepts, including abstractions of observable phenomena expressed as quantifiable properties, together with rules (called scientific laws) that express relationships between observations of such concepts. A scientific theory is constructed to conform to available empirical data about such observations, and is put forth as a principle or body of principles for explaining a class of phenomena.”
    Dear Jordan, you don’t know half the words in that sentence.
    Please don’t be like that tea party woman and show yourself as a dumbass. You don’t know what you are talking about.
    There isn’t a creationist who does. You lack knowledge. It’s a pitty, but hey, life sucks.
    So, if evolution is ‘just a theory’ and therefore creationism should be taught in class, then so should the teachings of the Flying Spaghetti Monster.
    If you don’t get that, then you fail.

    • tekhedd says:

      Actually, Jordan has stated in his comments that he is perfectly fine with having FSM taught in the schools. Although, to be perfectly honest, I don’t believe him when he says that.

  4. edd says:

    Jordan has mentioned several times in these comments that he/she understands what a scientific theory is and ‘believes’ in evolution due to the overwhelming evidence in its favor. However, like many proponents of Intelligent Design, Jordan also suffers from a few blind spots as the result of religious indoctrination (reinforced by a ‘mystical’ or ‘spiritual’ experience, apparently) resulting in a demand that this one theory, evolution, should be treated differently than every other. Students don’t need to be constantly reminded that adding 2 apples +2 apples has always resulted in 4 apples but they should keep an open mind concerning other possibilities.

    • tekhedd says:

      Yes, he says that he knows what a scientific theory is, but his original letter shows that he did not. It’s nice to see that he has learned from this discussion, but it’s sad that he feels he has to lie about it. It is good to acknowledge your own ignorance; that’s how you learn! (People who refuse to admit ignorance are, in fact, most of the problem…)

  5. JamesL says:

    I pray to Jabu Jabu. I mean, he’s somewhere around 10 times bigger inside than he is on the outside! That’s badass.

  6. Noodlity says:

    I think our new friend Jordan has left for good. However, like after any good educational experience, why don’t we enumerate the things that we learned from him:

    1. Botched up statistics qualify as actual strength in numbers, which is then equivalent to scientific rigor at presenting facts to the general public.

    2. Facts, by definition, are merely matters of belief, and everything in life is only ever taken on pure unsubstantiated faith. Any scientific testing is only done for fun, and the results are discarded, should we choose not to believe in them.

    And, of course:

    3. You can always just insult those with different faith than yours (calling them Communists is a popular choice); yet you’re not, in fact, forcing your beliefs on them, if you have explicitly stated so in advance.

    Now, isn’t education fun?


  7. Bosn_C_Otter says:

    Funny thing, someone sent me a great tweet. He compared Christians use of the Bible to those who download programs online. They scroll quickly to the bottom and check “I agree” without having a clue whats in the contract.

  8. math bully says:

    So once WE have the majoritiy, then the “facts” are in our favor. Only about 3.6 billion more pastafarians to go guys!

    “May you eat his noodle and have his balls in your stomach” RAmen-

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