When you have 3.6 Billion adherents

Published November 27th, 2010 by Bobby Henderson

When you have 3.6 Billion adherents to your faith, we can start talking about teaching your ideas in school. When you think you’re right or not the decision on whether or not to teach creationism in school should come from the majority and the fact is 82.3% of Americans are christian and therefore believe that the earth was created by God and only 11.6 are unaffiliated with a religion, of which only a fraction are atheist or agnostic. Take out the agnostics because if they’re really agnostic they won’t care what’s being taught in school, and we’re talking about a small number of really loud people that are trying to force their beliefs on the rest of the country. How messed up is that. I’m not going to force my beliefs on you. I think that’s why they did the whole separation of church and state thing, so that a certain belief system, Evolution included, would not be forced upon the population. So teach evolution, go ahead, I know for a fact that Brigham Young University and Brigham Young University Idaho, two christian schools teach evolution in their required classes, but if you’re going to teach one THEORY, and I emphasize theory not fact, then give credence to other theories that bare any social impact on our society. Like how about a theory that more than 50% of the world subscribes to? Anyway, peace be the journey, I give you credit for some funny stuff, like pirates and global warming, but don’t pretend to take nothing seriously if you actually do have very serious agenda.

All religions go through a phase of perceived fakeness. Funny you bring up BYU.  Mormonism got a lot of criticism for years because Joseph Smith used seer stones to find the location of their original scriptures and translate them from unknown languages.  Some might say that sounds like BS.  But with time and pressure it becomes a religion.  Not unlike the formation of rocks.  I am a scientist first, remember.

506 Responses to “When you have 3.6 Billion adherents”

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  1. theFewtheProudtheMarinara says:

    When I earlier stated that Jordan was inflating the world-wide Xtian population by 50%, I was using the highest estimate I could find. Most estimates say 2 or 2.1 billion, not 3.6, so his error was more like 75 – 80%. It’s probable that Christians will NEVER number 3 billion before their creed fades away. Yes, I know it’s lasted 2,000 years, but for almost all that time we had virtually no science to counter blind faith. Go into almost any church and guess the average age of the congregation. Their influence is shrinking quickly.

    • Noodlity says:

      I was left with the impression that he included Jews and Muslims as well. Apparently, adherence to an Abrahamic religion automatically makes you a creationist; go figure.

      • theFewtheProudtheMarinara says:

        Why, Noodlity? He only mentions Christianity. Yeah, I know that supposedly they believe in the same god, although they call him different names, disagree about who his most important prophet was, and have slaughtered each other over minute liturgical differences…

        • Noodlity says:

          True dat.

        • theFewtheProudtheMarinara says:

          The idea Jordan was including all 3 Abrahamic religions is probably enforced by the figure 3.6 billion, which is probably correct, at least very close. I believe that is due to the fact that they found it convenient to try and persuade the believers of the earlier religion that they were merely updating – not replacing – their canon. This would give the new religion instant “cred”.

  2. Patrick says:

    Evolution is not a belief, it is a substantiated theory. Therefore it is wrong to to say “i believe in evolution.” You accept the numerous facts that support evolution. Please guys, get it right or we’ll just sound like any other church.

  3. patrick says:

    jordan its not about how many people you have in your religion. my man its about the people in it how deep do your people believe in it. i know most of that 3.6 billion don’t actually believe in it the grew up with it. i grew up a roman catholic but i didn’t know why i was and i wasn’t happy with where i was in my religion. now i am a Rastafarian ive never been happier with the simple life. so lets all stop worrying about this i have a small religion but everyone i know has a much deeper love for it then any catholic i have every met.
    one love.
    jah bless

  4. Sim o says:

    Two things one Christianity is a religion this is a religion it deserves no less respect because it doesn’t have 3.6 billion people. Christianity incorporates no graphs or charts examining the direct correlation between global warming and pirates . Two being agnostic doesn’t just mean you don’t care so it’s alright. How bout we teach Pastafarinism to them because they don’t care. Also you appear to be a strong xenophobe and I urge you to see a physciatrist. As You seem to have imagined us forcing our religion on you. Unless His Doughiness compelled you you visited this site of your own accord. Also I seem to recall a few million homeless and desperate people being taken advantage of and forced into christianity. Lastly evolution is not a theory it is a law as no one has pinpointed the gens responsible I think if I took your merely cult of fanatics and put them in an arena with our 8 billion strong followers you and your church would perish in agony. Ramen

  5. Eddie says:

    I’m not sure I believe that more than 50% of Americans buy creationism just because they are Christian. Most Christian Americans I know have a very logical view of what the bible says.

    • Spammyboy says:

      The unfortunate truth is that we all know which side have the best-designed websites…

  6. Allan says:

    i know very few people read this but let me explain how government works to you because you seem confused. in America we have rights, rights like freedom of speech and some of these rights were deemed so powerful that they are not subject to public opinion. this idea that because were in a democracy we can have what most people want is simply not true. just like if 86 percent of people hated jews, we still couldn’t kill them. or if 86 percent of people decided free speech wasn’t really necessary, we still couldn’t get rid of it. that’s why we have a constitution, your grasp of government.
    hail Eris, RAmen

  7. TiltedHorizon says:

    I find that many Christians count all denominations and factions of Christianity to bolster credibility but the moment an example is cited of unchristian behavior lines are instantly drawn. “That’s , we are not like that…”, “they are not true Christians…”. How can there be 3.6 billion adherents as a whole when the truth is, they don’t all see eye to eye?

    Reminds me of an old joke by from Emo Philips:

    Once I saw this guy on a bridge about to jump. I said, “Don’t do it!” He said, “Nobody loves me.” I said, “God loves you. Do you believe in God?”

    He said, “Yes.” I said, “Are you a Christian or a Jew?” He said, “A Christian.” I said, “Me, too! Protestant or Catholic?” He said, “Protestant.” I said, “Me, too! What franchise?” He said, “Baptist.” I said, “Me, too! Northern Baptist or Southern Baptist?” He said, “Northern Baptist.” I said, “Me, too! Northern Conservative Baptist or Northern Liberal Baptist?”

    He said, “Northern Conservative Baptist.” I said, “Me, too! Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region, or Northern Conservative Baptist Eastern Region?” He said, “Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region.” I said, “Me, too!”

    “Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1879, or Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1912?” He said, “Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1912.” I said, “Die, heretic!” And I pushed him over.

  8. Brandon MacCormick says:

    I hate religion. I hate anyone who beleives in religion. I hate evrything about religion. Theres not enough room in infinty to measure how much I hate you and religion. Jusy by putting hate mail up on this website, you have shown your just an ignorant asshole who only cares about sucking your religions dick because your so pathetic, that your afraid of even the thought you could suffer in hell when you die, when you should be focusing on having a fulfilling and happy life for you and maybe your family if you have one. You’ve started wars, and done other unspeekable acts against society and the very well being of other people that I dont know why the UN doesnt consider you a threat against the world for your crimes against humanity, with all the genecides, cults, and families you, your religion, and your family as a whole have caused or may cause again.
    The reason mainstream religons have so many followers in the first place is because in the past, they tortured murdered, chased, and spited down anyone who opposed what they beleved in. You christers(christians) are the the most sad, disgusting individuals that will ever be witnessed on the face of this earth. Your religion brings more negative aspects to humanity then positive. You make people into ignorant brainwashed slaves as exemplified by the midevial period in Europe. I could rant on about all the ways in which you have helped to retard every leap and bound society has made to strive to a more advanced future, but instead will summarize it up like this. You give people false hope in a god that cant even be verified by anthing but so called “hope”, bullshit*cough*, and if there was a contest for “Biggest Douches in the Universe” there would be a lot of trophies to hand out.

    • puppygoogoo says:

      Wow, This guy really missed the point!

      • Brandon MacCormick says:

        Thankyou! I wanted to see if anyone actually beleived all that stuff I spurted out. Im glad to know the majority of people on this arent fueled by actual hate for one another, because from some of the stuff on here, I was sort of getting the vibe.

        • puppygoogoo says:

          This whole religion is a ‘satire’ of common religions. People here get upset and therefore sarcastic at the people sending us hatemail without reading the about us tab.



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