i feel bad for the people who have been brainwashed

Published July 17th, 2009 by Bobby Henderson

OH MY FUCKING GOD! THIS IS SO FUNNY! Seriously, I feel bad for the people who have been brainwashed to believe in this bullshit! Come on! I’m not gonna have a 10 pages long document telling that this religion is bullshit (just as all other religions), but come on! Spaghetti is invented by humans! A fucking flyinh spaghetti monster! Just think about it for a second… A flying spaghetti monster. Do you know why this stupid religion was made? Because some guys wanted to show the world how easy it is to brainwash idiots. When it was published, the brainwashed people refused to accept it, and kept on believing in a fucking, flying spaghetti monster! Oh my god! And ofcourse the amount of pirates is sinking! THEY ARE BEING KILLED! And ofcourse the temperature is rising! WE ARE ON THE TOP OF A TEMPERATURE CURVE, and in about 100 years, the temperature will start to sink again. But there will still be as many “pirates”. This is all so fucking bullshit. Come on. In one million years from now, some students making a cult for fun is gonna say that the world was made 100 years ago or something similar to this shit. But come on. We are alive now, aren’t we? But in a thousand years (or 50) this religion will be forgotten, and people will start believing in other stupid religions, such as “The Farting Chocolate Dude”. And come on. Muslims and christians believe so much in god and stuff that they would kill themselves for their “gods”. But you know that those religions are bullshit. They know that the flying spaghetti monster is bullshit. Ok, now I’m gonna guess that your name is “Mark” and now let’s pretend “Mark” is the person reading this. Mark first believes in god, and he believes so much in it that he would kill himself for god and jesus. Then somebody makes him believe in Allah and all that bullshit. Now Mark knows that Islam is true, and he would kill himself for allah. Then he is brainwashed to believe in the flying spaghetti monster. Now he knows that god, jesus and allah is bullshit, and now he knows that the flying spaghetti monster is real. COME ON! It’s not like whatever religion you believe in is the one that is right about it all. It’s not like first, god and jesus exists in some heaven, then you change religion, now god and jesus doesn’t exist anymore, now the flying spaghetti monster / the farting chocolate dude is real.

Come on. It is all in your brains. You have been listening to masters in brainwashing for a long time and now you actually believe in something as stupid as a dinner invented by humans for not long ago made the fucking universe. A dinner. With meat and spice on. Come on dudes. What the fuck?

Think again


339 Responses to “i feel bad for the people who have been brainwashed”

  1. ALLAH says:


  2. Dutchie says:

    How come everybody forgets the Jews??? Poor guys :)

  3. Danielle, Uk says:

    One question: If there is something we can not see doesn’t mean is doesn’t exists.
    Does that mean the wind or our breath can not be real?

    Because with out some physical action or reaction to a tree or a cold day.
    It too would be invisible to the naked eye.

    I believe in religion in a different way, Understanding and respecting others believe.
    Maybe we are not meant to know until the end.

    Maybe our path’s may have already been chosen for us and all we have to do is walk them.
    Together. Now I am not saying that you should change you mind but I believe in god.

    Somehow I wonder just how much hatred and anger each people have to people like me.
    It is my own choice just like yours. It is my own mind that took the choice of the church and
    it makes me angry to see just how wrong people are. Please remember that underneath each robe or clerical collar is a human heart and brain which responds to feelings just as you would.

    Now I am not saying all religion is right or wrong. However, all religions have a dark history in the past but this is mute now and people should start to realise this is our own path we’ve have taken and each of us is welcome
    to opinion but sometime our tongues can run a little too much and that is what causes trouble.

    However, forgiveness is a selfish act: by forgiving you are clearing yourself of all blame and worry.

    …Note to people keep lessons learnt in life and work together it is the world our planet that we need to help.
    past feuds are nothing but in the past and it seems unfair to keep raises them to the surface.

    We all need to remember that famous line from a certain rabbit
    ‘ When you can’t say something nice say nothing at all.’

    We all need to learn to agree to disagree.

    • Rev. Wulff says:

      “all religions have a dark history in the past but this is mute now”

      Presumable you meant moot, not mute.

      And you are absolutely wrong. Religious fundamentalism is *the* single greatest threat to the health and well-being of every single being on this planet. Christian and Muslim militia groups are chasing each other across Africa with machine guns as we speak. Russia’s anti-gay legislations are barely a step removed from Uganda’s. If you’d happened to be born in the Middle East, you’d most likely have had your clitoris chopped off at a young age. Tea Party members across the United States are trying to make their own twisted interpretation of scripture into law.

      I said it on another post, just days ago. Good people don’t need a god to do good. People who do good (or don’t do bad) only because of a god aren’t good people anyway.

      “It is my own mind that took the choice of the church and it makes me angry to see just how wrong people are.”

      Right here, by your own words, is the truth of your beliefs: You’re right, anyone who disagrees with you is wrong, and you’re mad that people disagree with you. How christian of you.

    • Captain Birdseye says:

      Danielle. What a silly bunny that would be. If I saw Hitler in action, I would not say something nice, or remain silent. Such attitude promotes and underpins violence and abuse. Despite the apparent paradox, I would have killed him if I was able.
      People should be encouraged from childhood, without fear, to say (not act) whatever they like AND to judge other’s actions; the power is with the LISTENER and not the SPEAKER. But, they should be aware that others have the same rights, and others’ judgement of their actions may ultimately include: “And life (imprisonment) means life!”
      From my observations, some people confuse listen and believe and blame others for their own narcissism, gullibility and behaviour.
      Thank FSM for secular Law!

      PS: If a snake talked to me, I would laugh and try to tame it. Silly bunny Eve.

  4. Ashton says:

    I feel bad for people who got brainwashed too

    Christian parents teach their children that there is a man in the sky that created everyone and everything
    Jewish parents do the same, so do Muslim parents

    • Rasputin says:

      Dear Ashton, I will teach my little boy that the universe was created by a flying spaghetti monster. When my son laughs in my face and tells me I’m talking nonsense, I will have succeeded. R’amen.

  5. Excelsior says:

    Ashton, Rasputin:
    Well said! The last bastion of slavery is religion! Parents don’t realize it but they are making religious slaves of their children when they brain-wash them to accept their own religion! Christian families turn out Christian slaves. Muslim families turn out Muslim slaves. etc. When children are allowed to choose their own religion or no religion, only then will mankind really be free!
    As things are now going, it will be many centuries before mankind wins this final battle for freedom! However, be assured, the ultimate victory is certain to be ours!

  6. ATSAP REVOL says:

    Just checking in to see if the Sacred Farting Chocolate Dude is still making converts. It has been six years since we learned of this Omnipotent Chocolatey LORD, and his Divine Plan for our salivation. I trust that many of you have completed your pilgrimage to Hershey, Pennsylvania, in reverent worship of the Farting Chocolate Dude. May you be blessed with the aromatic brown vapors emitted by His Holy Hole. Let us pray: “Our Dude which art in Theobromo Cacao Paradise, Harold be thy name, bless us daily with Thy Divine Flatulence, and lead us not away from enchiladas stuffed with black beans, All this we ask in Mr. Goodbar’s name…Amen.”

  7. William Maxwell says:

    I for one embrace our new lord and saviour The Farting Chocolate Dude, may his gastric exorcisms and cocoa enriched goodness save all our souls.

    • Saint Gnocchi says:

      Dear William Maxwell, hello and wellcome.
      Its okay for you to advertise your Farting Chocolate Dude on our website. Our FSM god is not a jealous god and merrily shares. Long live the Flying Spaghetti Monster and his new buddy Farting Chocolate Dude!

      • Excelsior says:

        The FSM is not a “jealous God” like the God of Abraham who is the acme of narcissisticity! In his 10 Commandments he says that anyone who worships any other God will burn in hell for eternity! Not only him, but his descendents for 4 generations will burn with him! However, even that God would be welcome here if he apologized for the 10 Commandments and admitted that he was drunk when he wrote them and agreed to write a new set of Commandments that are compaible with the Bill of Rights and permits freedom of religion and prohibits “cruel and unusual punishments” like burning in hell for eternity!

        • Keith says:

          It wasn’t just ten commandments.Those ten were chosen at random out of a whole host of commandments. The god of Abraham was not just drunk: he must have been “strung out on Heaven’s high” ( to quote from a famous song) when he dictated that crap.

        • Rasputin says:

          I expect the Farting Chocolate Dude and the FSM hang out together.

      • Rasputin says:

        Well said, St. G.

  8. Nate says:

    Do Christians not realize that their god is a giant bearded man in a white robe? I don’t think they should be judging our carbohydrate-based deity.

    • Captain Birdseye says:

      Exactly, Nate. How dare they insist that zombie-on-stick is superior.

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