You say you have read the Bible

Published July 8th, 2008 by Bobby Henderson

This message was directed towards one of our members:

You say you have read the Bible. If you did you would have took something away from it other than it was crap so I say you are a liar. Not only that reading the Bible and studding the bible is two different thing. The bible clearly states that we have been given free will to serve God or not to. And here is something for you to think about, God made Satan and when he made all the angels he gave them the free will to serve him too. But Satan the father of all deception, had come to deceive himself into believing he was as powerful as God him self. You see when God created Satan he was the most perfect angel of all, and had powers that God allowed him to have. So Satan got to big for his pants and God kicked him out of heaven, the same way we do with our children today with our households. He gave Satan rule of the earth so when you say all of our problems started with a talking snake. Sorry your wrong again, it started again with Satan the father of all deception. He was able to deceive Eve into eating from the tree of life. You see Adam and Eve were as children and as easy as it is to trick a child it was as easy for Satan to trick them into disobeying Gods commandment. You also say you want to stop the war in Iraq. The Bible states that with faith the size of a mustard seed we can move mountains. You don’t really want to stop the war you just say you do because the only way to overcome evil is with God on your side. If you were really for stopping the war you would pray for Gods mercy, and not mock his power or love. You make a comment on the fact that God is vengeful for your sins, “YES” you better believe it and if you don’t now you will someday. You also make a comment that God flooded the world and killed everyone because they did not agree with him your wrong it was not because the people did not agree with him he has told us how it is he doesn’t need us to agree with him he is the one that is wright. He flooded the would, because he seen that there was none of it was good. God spread the word that the world was going to be flooded, and if anyone would have believed him they would have started building something to float on man. But it is the same as God has told you in the greatest book ever written, he is coming again and if you are not ready and living your life for him, than your gonna burn in hell. So you better building something to float on. You also comment saying “Adolf hated Jewish people of religion and race God hates Jews of religions”. Man are you sure you have read the same bible as me because my God “so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son, that whosoever believing him should not parish, but have ever lasting life” JOHN 3:16 and JOHN 3:17 says For God sent not his son into the world to condemn the world; but that the world through him might be saved. How is that anything like Adolf Hitler??????? Man you’ve gotta be kidding me your questions are so easy to answer, I just do not understand you say you have read the bible what did you read man????????

your stupidity puzzles me more than your questions. And to wrap up your stupid question after question. you commented that Christianity made groups like the kkk. What??? I mean man come on, you have got to tell where did you pull this from. Do you have a book of how to be dumb for dummies? The organization KKK is answered by MATTHEW 7:15 Beware of false prophets, which come to you in sheeps clothing, but inwardly they are raving wolves. You better get on your knees and start praying man because you are playing with fire you don’t want to play with you are gambling with thing you really don’t want to be gambling with.


258 Responses to “You say you have read the Bible”

  1. Miguelito says:

    I love how this guy keeps promoting Christianity as a very peaceful religion. Certain events come to mind… The Crusades, for example, when hundreds of devout christians slaughtered thousands of Muslims so they could have Bethlehem. Or maybe the Inquisition? Or the Salem Witch trials? Or the multitude of people who stand outside on sidewalks just to hold up signs that say “Fags die, God laughs.” Oh yeah, Christianity is soooooo peaceful.

    • Excelsior says:

      I am not a Christian Church apologist. However, The great murderings done by that Church were all done Centuries ago. That Church has evolved to become quite a civilized religion today and is more or less compatible with modern secular society. On the other hand, Islam is stuck in the stone age quagmire and hasn’t evolved an iota. Islam keeps spawning evil cults like ISIS, Boko Haram, Taliban, Alqaeda, Al-Sabaab, etc. and has turned the Middle East and North Africa into a nightmare! They are now trying to turn our society into a nightmare too! The Islam Church will probably have to evolve for a few more Centuries before they attain compatibility with secular society! We just have to wait and see! I hope the human race will outlive Islam!

      • Rasputin says:

        Agreed, Excelsior. Christians flock to church on Sundays and for marriages, funerals and Christenings. In reality, most Christians use their faith as a kind of buffet: Select what you like, disregard the stuff you don’t want. Catholics pray to their gob but use condoms. They take the communion but work on Sundays. They enjoy pre-marital sex but listen politely to their celibate virgin clergy.
        I like the reference to Quagmire. Giggidy.

        • Fat Bastard says:

          All cultures/people: construct a mythology of their histories; enjoy social frameworks; feel ‘intoxicated’ by ritualised behaviour; ponder the ‘meaning of life’; try to control Nature, etc. Religion seems to be the combining of all of these. Why, is an interesting question.

        • Excelsior says:

          Agreed! The Christian Church has lost most of it’s mythical hocus-pokus and has degenerated into a community Club-House. When I was a Church goer, we used the Church for all facets of life including having parties where you could find a sweet heart, marriages, Christenings, funerals, Boyscouts, Girlscouts, etc. The Minister/Parson was always busy with matters such as refereeing fights between husband and wife. Doctors and Lawyers liked to join our Church so they could find more clients. The list of activities is endless!
          If the FSM really wants to go bigtime we will have to learn from them!

        • Fat Bastard says:

          Were there many drunken orgies? Or, was that just a Borgia thing that excluded the congregation?

  2. Keith says:

    I would have said “piecemeal” rather that peaceful. Like every other religion it had bits added on and taken off, largely for the convenience of the people in charge at the time. Christianity has EVOLVED (shock, horror).

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  6. Alphonsus says:

    Notice how fundamentalists always have an excuse, a platitude or an explanation for everything? Of course when you believe in their airy fairy crap, a whole universes reated in six days, Johah living in a whale’s belly for three days, miracles, God talking through a burning bush, walking on water and their insane Rapture crap, well…, seems like they justify about anything kind of nonsense imaginable. Remember, these people are “justified by faith”! They just don’t deal with reality, the sciences or anything else. They live with their heads up their asses and want us to do the same.

  7. just a rando says:

    Hmmmmmm colonialism was the most peaceful thing every. The whole entire world loves and thanks white European Christians for this.

    • Excelsior says:

      Just be glad that the Americas were colonized by the Christians and not the Muslims. If we were colonized by the Muslims then the whole American Continent would be just like the Middle East is today! The black saves would also still be slaves today! Most people don’t know that the slave-traders bought the slaves from the Muslim slave owners. Christianity is horrible, but Islam is much worse. It’s a pity that America was not colonized by us Pastafarians. In that case, the Americas would be a heaven on Earth today!! Glory to the FSM!! Ramen!!

      • Patroller says:

        I agree with your initial point. Your second point is for those who believe in fairies. Disabled toilet.

      • Rasputin says:

        Well said, Excelsior. However the USA would not be the economic power house it is today. Sharia law and Muslim culture would have inhibited economic growth. North America today would be an intolerant sh*thole like the rest of the Muslim world, and slavery would still exist.

  8. Fat Bastard says:

    White Christian colonialism is still alive and well, just slightly more disguised.

    • Patroller says:

      Disabled toilet.

    • Rasputin says:

      Agreed, FB. But it’s based upon trade. It’s tolerant and adapts to local conditions. The more a country adapts to the western model, the more freedom and wealth the people possess.

      • Fat Bastard says:

        Rasputin, not just WASP (white Anglo-Saxon Protestant) trade style (which has Colonialism embedded in it), but also the purpose of the consumption of energy. We are strongly involved in symbolic relationships with ‘energy’. Many people are welcomed home by a lightbulb, rather than a person.
        You mention the words freedom and wealth, but, what is it that indicates when one has these? Another word difficult to measure is ‘progress’. Again, what indicators are used to know when one has achieved it? The definition of ‘affluent’ is, having all of one’s need met, but, we tend to forget that adjusting one’s perceived needs and/or indicators is another way of achieving the pleasant sensation of affluence. Kalahari bushmen define themselves as ‘affluent’.
        The meanings of these words has been hijacked and defined for us by others: Colonialism is embedded in the language.

        • Fat Bastard says:

          How many of you noticed that the Pope recently declared Global Warming a ‘sin’? Does he sanctify an increase in the number of Pastafarians?

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