Calling Ontario Pastafarians

There is an election for the Premier of the Canadian province Ontario, where the conservative party is fighting the liberal party over the issue of publicly funded religious school boards.

The incumbent liberals would like to maintain a publicly funded secular school system. [There is also currently a publicly funded Catholic school system, but evolution is taught in science classes and creationism is taught in religion classes; the students are given the opportunity to decide for themselves.]

The opposition conservative party would like to modify the current system by extending faith-based funding to all other religions.

Many are concerned about the segregation that will occur when kids are compartmentalized into specialized schools based on their parents’ faith, which is often correlated with their ethnicity, i.e. Jews to one school, Muslims to another.

That said, it would be nice to have a publicly funded Pastafarian school.

Jason Parent is going to make this a reality. Please read his letter, and pass it along to any like-minded individuals:

Greetings To All Ontario Voters,

If you live in Ontario, then you are likely aware that there is currently an election going on and that the major issue is one of faith-based funding in Ontario schools. The Conservative party would like to finally open up the public education system to all of the faiths in the world – including Pastafarianism. Imagine a day when your children can sing, play and dance with their Pastafarian brethren in between classes; imagine a time when our religious beliefs may be taught at the schools where your children attend. This is indeed a very exciting time in Ontario.

However, the Liberal party would not extend funding to Pastafarian schools if elected. Why does Dalton McGuinty oppose Pastafarianism? Why would he oppose our right to impart our Pastafarian beliefs on our children through the public school system?

I am hereby launching a campaign for Pastafarianism in our public schools, and am asking for your support. First of all, you need to vote for John Tory on October 10th to allow this to happen, as the intolerant Liberal party will never let us launch any Pastafarian schools. Secondly, please send me your email address; I will keep it in a safe place so that when the time comes for us to sign a petition and bring it into Queen’s Park we will be able to quickly do so. Thirdly, please spread the word so that the number of potential signatures may grow as quickly as possible.

I am deeply committed to seeing a publicly funded Pastafarian school board in Ontario and hope that I can count on your support. Please send all email addresses to [email protected]. Expect a reply only once John Tory has implemented his faith-based funding program.

I will not sell your email addresses, nor will I provide them to any third-party at all – not ever, ever, ever, ever. If you’re worried then give me your spam addy; but there’s no reason to be worried.

May The Noodley-One Be With You,
Jason Parent