spreading the Word in Iraq

Published December 23rd, 2006 by Bobby Henderson
Oh, wise prophet,
I, James of the family Duck would like to enlighten you of the plight faced by the soldiers, civilians, Iraqis and pirates in his noodly appendages cradle of civilization.  Currently the United States Army provides a vast and diverse Chaplains Corp to fulfill the spiritual needs of its hard pressed soldiers.  However at the more remote sites, the Chaplains visit when they can about once a month and distribute literature and religious supplements like crosses, Korans and rosaries.
Unfortunately there are no Pastafarian Chaplains for those touched by His Greatness.  We believe that His Noodlyness deserves equal time along side those theories that harness the power of the printed letter and printer ink.  Even without resources one lone Pastafarian has spread the word to the willing and now over 10% ( 3.27 people) of our installation have been touched.  The local Pastafarians lack the proper eye-patches, swords, hook hands and frilly pirate clothes to properly speak to others who may also seek the truth in these ancient lands.  I propose that if we had official looking papers with letters on them bound into a 192 page “Gospel” to stack proudly next to our mountain of more commonly available books more passers by (which we get quite a lot) could take interest in the Truth that is Flying Spaghetti Monster.
We where wondering, oh wise one, if you could help us out in our plight to spread the word by sending eye patches, hook hands and if possible big pirate hats and a number of copies of The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster .  We here do not have the expendable resources to print out pamphlets, posters or charts showing how global warming is afflicting the pirate population and feel a couple copies of The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster will enforce equal time.
Thank You for listening to our plea,
SPC Duck, James and fellow Pastafarians

P.S.  If you would like to help us out please email me back so I can give you our address.  We really want to take pictures of us in Iraq with FSM propaganda and we think the Iraqi Army guys here with us would love it too!  We also think that a picture of an American and an Iraqi coming together under His Noodly Appendage would be a great message of world peace.  Of course we will try our best not to just jump one of the Iraqi Army guys here and snap a shot off, we will do our best to inform him so he is totally aware of the decision he is making to put his face on the Internet and what it is for. These guys risk their lives just working here.

P.P.S. Also I saw a US civilian contractor with a “Do you believe?” shirt on a month or two back.  Did not get to talk to her, but let it be known the truth is out there.  Even if nothing comes of all this, THANK YOU for providing us with such awesome entertainment.  I does get people thinking.

36 Responses to “spreading the Word in Iraq”

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  1. Grand Mama says:

    “Even without resources one lone Pastafarian has spread the word to the willing and now over 10% ( 3.27 people) of our installation have been touched.”
    I wonder if Duck and co. have manged to convert the other 6.73% of that person yet.

  2. Wench Nikkiee says:

    Of course you meant the other 0.73% of that person didn’t you Grand Mama?

  3. Duckman says:

    Hello Everyone!

    I know it has been a bit long, but things have been happening over here…

    1. Someone else in the Army in Iraq saw my letter, I am not sure if he wants his contact info added to mine for FSM stuff and I was waiting a bit to see if he was OK with that.
    2. “Things” I cannot talk about that might have changed my mailing address got worked out.
    3. A Fellow Pastafarian has found my myspace, I was kind of wondering it that would happen… neat

    I have decided that hey, if you want to send stuff, contact me at my Yahoo account at

    [email protected]-nospam please-

  4. David says:

    Blessed are the peacemakers:
    for they shall be called the
    Children of God
    (Mat 5:9)
    Jesus’s way is not by sword but by cross

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