Kansas Outlaws Practice Of Evolution

Published December 5th, 2006 by Bobby Henderson

The satirical news magazine The Onion has a new article out on the Kansas Intelligent Design / Evolution issue:  Kansas Outlaws Practice Of Evolution.

In response to a Nov. 7 referendum, Kansas lawmakers passed emergency legislation outlawing evolution, the highly controversial process responsible for the development and diversity of species and the continued survival of all life.


Link to article.

133 Responses to “Kansas Outlaws Practice Of Evolution”

  1. L'TUAE_42 says:

    Pure people are just no fun at all. They don’t know how to have a good time. Hey! We (pastafarians) should go find all the pure people and show them how to loosen up. I just know they will accept our loose morals once they know the true joy of the FSM!

  2. Peter Popoff says:

    Hey, Everybody…
    I was lurking a little while ago, I didn’t have time to post.
    But anyway, I saw a thread that had grapes and rum filled watermelons referenced in it.
    Now I can’t seem to find that thread? Can someone direct me to it?
    I probably have something to add there, maybe?

  3. Wench Nikkiee says:

    That was mine Peter, it was on the ‘Third Element’ thread. (BTW I stole the rum/melon idea from you….hahahaha)

  4. weirdric says:

    I understand that the Kansas state Board of Education has now declared the earth to be flat, [a fact provable by looking out any window in the state] and has ordered all heretical ‘globes’ removed from classrooms!

    Could ‘evolved’ people in Kansas not start a movement to be recognised as a minority?

  5. Tagliatellius says:

    I hear that one of the states is trying to ban Harry Potter books from it’s schools because they encourage witchcraft!
    I hope they ban that evil movie The Wizard Of Oz, and what about that Shakespeare guy? I seem to recall that witches feature in his books too.
    F.S.M. save us from these retarded fools, Ramen arrr.

  6. daqq says:

    Tagliatellius: What next? Faust banned from schools because of satanists?

  7. DutchPastaGirl says:

    Tagliatellus, I hope He will, I really do. I mean why not ban the bible? There are some weird things in there, incest (adam&eve&kids), murder of certain people is definitly encouraged etc etc. Harry couldn’t possibly do more harm!

    But I guess it’s the same people after Columbine (I think, i’m not sure) who didn’t ban guns, oh no, they banned long dark overcoats instead!!

    I don’t think we and people who think like that will ever really understand one another. Do at least we probably will TRY…

  8. sprite says:

    hahaha the onion is fantastic, there is one problem with banning evolution, doesnt that mean we all have to procreate and must do it with those that are most genetically similar, e.g. family, not only is that sick disgusting and so disturbing i am going to vomit any second now but it is incest which i believe is against bible law

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