you have completely pissed us off

Published October 23rd, 2006 by Bobby Henderson

Please do not take any offensive “hate mail” written by Christians as an example of Christianity. We are not very good Christians; we who use words of hate. You must understand, however, that you have completely pissed us off. This site is just stupid. The concept is stupid. I can give you evidence against evolution if you so desire.

I do sort of agree that ID should not be taught in schools, but neither should evolution. It is wrong that evolution, classified as SCIENTIFIC THEORY, is taught as a fact. Teaching evolution in schools is just as offensive to us as teaching ID in schools is to you. We are all people.

The majority of Christians do not want to press our beliefs upon anybody else. The same cannot be said for scientists, it appears. Plus, while Christians want to bring wayward people to God for the wayward people’s sake, scientists want to study and elaborate on evolution because they think they can discover something wonderful and get rich off of it. So, there is still a difference between the two sides.

I think this whole fight is futile. It is written that God’s children will be hated by all, and I can see that’s the way it’s going. Everybody hates Christians…

-Yet Another Christian

540 Responses to “you have completely pissed us off”

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  1. Steve R says:

    @ Qasdf

    Henderbob only posted what was sent to him in an email, (if you look at any hatemail they are all ‘from’ him) he tends to get a lot from the Flying Spaghetti Monster haters out there after creating it and all.
    You’ve just misunderstood it I think

  2. Answeris42 says:

    Another Christian says…
    “Teaching evolution in schools is just as offensive to us as teaching ID in schools is to you. We are all people.”

    We sure are, though some are smarter than others. When you people look at this site and say it’s stupid, we find it amusing because all you are dong is admitting the stupidity of your own pathetic belief system. FSM is just as ‘real’ as your god. Reality has nothing to do with opinion or belief. What is, just is , and it doesn’t care if you believe in it or not! In that sense FSM is much closer to science than any religion will ever be. Belief in religion is ignorance. There is no nice way to put it. It’s scary to think that there are so many people who don’t seem to have the intelligence to see the irony in their own criticisms of obviously more righteous Pastafarians. Anti-FSMism shows that you are either, ignorant, stupid, lacking any comprehension of reality and/or silliness whatsoever, or all of the above. All hail The FSM and Great Prophet!

    To Henderbob: While on a recent pilgrimage to purchase my own copy of the Gospel, I was horrified to find that, in Chapter’s, the teachings of our leader are catalogued under ‘Humour’! I shudder to think of the scandal that would arise if The New Testament was displayed under such a catagory. Even though we have a HUGE congregation, I find it sad that out of 6.5 billion people in the world, only Pastafarians REALLY get it.

    PS: I have come accross secret documents that prove the Priory of Sion was a real religious group. They still possess the grail to this day. Scholars have described it as an ancient thermal pasta cooker… (it cooks in minutes, right before your eyes!)

  3. raspberry says:

    ok so you raise an interesting point, why should we impose our veiws on you and teach evolution in skools?
    religion is not wrong.
    but scientific fact has effected many of the christian churches teachings, eg: the sun revolves around the earth…we know no other wise…point is, why should small things like this truly matter if god really exists? lets teach fact, and let students make decisions for themselves…p.s not everyone hates Christians…:)

  4. Dismas says:

    I want to congratulate you on creating an excellent parody of Creationism, I feel sorry for all the people who have bothered to send you hate mail saying how “you trully are morons” (for example) as this is nothing to scoff at just because it is a very recent spiritual development. In reality the idea of the ancient Yahwistic God is just as absurd, but is more widely accepted due to its age and wide range of countries that it covers.

    In my view nobody should take offence to this website, it’s a really intelligent way of attempting to uncover peoples’ wool-plagued eyes, and all you prejudiced tossers out there who take this website literally should just stick to your own beliefs if you don’t like this radical new idea.

    However, I must apologise to the FSM fundamentalists, as I hold no spiritual beliefs what-so-ever and hold the concept of a flying spaghetti monster as ridiculous as the idea of the Christian God. Having said that I applaud you’re courageous attempt to give your God a definite image.

    Perhaps your prophet will call his disciples and in the late 2000’s a select few FSM evangelists will collate the details and eyewitness accounts of your travels and in time your very own canon of scripture will be decided. Of course this will inevitably lead to the synoptic problem and prompt university scholars in a few millennia to study the texts in great detail…


  5. Alice Whiskey says:

    My only regret is that Dr. Stephen J. Gould was not alive when this site came into being. Yes, he is the original Scientist named Steve. The list of Steves who “endorse” evolution was started in his memory.

    For everyone out there who keeps saying that evolution is a theory, please read his article “Evolution as Fact and Theory” at:

    “Well, evolution is a theory. It is also a fact. And facts and theories are different things, not rungs in a hierarchy of increasing certainty. Facts are the world’s data. Theories are structures of ideas that explain and interpret facts. Facts do not go away when scientists debate rival theories to explain them. Einstein’s theory of gravitation replaced Newton’s, but apples did not suspend themselves in mid-air, pending the outcome. And humans evolved from apelike ancestors whether they did so by Darwin’s proposed mechanism or by some other, yet to be discovered.”

    If we are going to appear to understand the science behind evolution, let us not make mistakes in terminology that they can use against us.

    And for all the Christians out there: please remember that a Catholic is a Christian.

    And for anyone who wants more info on how to make their ideas look like science check out “the Bell Curve” by Charles Murray and Philippe Rushton’s “Race, Evolution and Behavior”. If Hitler had had these guys working for him, he’d probably have won the war!

    I myself am looking into this FSM. I have sent away for my copy of his Gospel. However, I currently belong to the Daughters of Marlon Brando. I can tell you no more about our secret religion for fear of prosecution…or persecution. But I was never touched by HIS noodley appendage. Long Live FSM!

    Alice Whiskey

  6. Calum, hairy Scotsman says:

    Well, I had a look at that ID website mentioned further up this thread, and couldn’t help but notice an absolute lack of a ‘post thread’ or ‘post comment’ button… they must be afraid of public comment. More kudos to the Pastafarians for having the guts to let anyone on the Net post replies.

    If you ask me, the only ID website worth a visit is iD Software.

  7. chocolatemonster says:


    evolution may be classified as a scientific theory, but that does not mean that it is built on flimsy evidence. in scientific literature, until something has been explained completely, it is referred to as a theory. so, even though evolution has been accepted as true almost unanimously by scientists, and has been supported by a wealth of evidence and the results of blood, sweat and tears of years of research, it cannot lose its title of “theory” until then. it does not at all mean that it is easily refuted, and it is definitely far more qualified to explain our origins than a myth can.

    in fact, on a different note, I have often wondered how people can see evolution as a colder, less enchanting story of how life on earth came to be! is it not absolutely awe-inspiring to thing that these amazingly complex life-forms around us arose from the tiniest sparks of life so many years ago? and how did life form? I think it is fascinating, and much more satisfying, than being told to believe that a megahuman, who appeared out of nowhere for no apparent reason at all, decided to create a planet and torment its inhabitants.

  8. jesus christ says:


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