now i hate spaghetti

Published October 25th, 2006 by Bobby Henderson

now I hate spagetti. this site is not funny. not one bit.

-student of Giauque

160 Responses to “now i hate spaghetti”

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  1. Fr. Corpus Callosum says:

    We like fire too, but only to boil water, make sauce, and brew beer. Oh yeah, strippers need to wash too. Do we have to wash the spaghetti pot in heaven, or is that done for us miraculously?

  2. Dunc says:

    indeed, especially when the pope goes and riles up another religion like he did
    kinda like saying to Bu$h – “no no, that’s not how you start an apocalyptic war… *THIS* is how you start an apocalyptic war….” cue badly chosen quote about muslims…
    way to go Benny, knew you had it in you to SNAFU spectacularly, still got your arm band?

  3. nikkiee says:

    # Anna Oct 31st, 2006 at 3:16 pm
    Yes, exactly! When people email here and are all courtious and well spoken, we respond in kind, and have no ill feelings toward them. If, however, they are illiterate and imediatly start insulting us….well, then we can’t really resist the urge to yell back. Kind of a vicious cycle actually….

    # 117 Iamme Oct 31st, 2006 at 3:30 pm
    Dont these religions these idiots support preach understanding and loving of all even if there beliefs are different? Then may I ask how we no supporting there religion are more conforming to its ideals then they are and they themselves are devout believers.

    # 118 Any Name’ll Do Oct 31st, 2006 at 3:48 pm
    The Flying Spaghetti Monster is better than a God. Also I have to say it annoys me christian people come on here and preach against FSM with the hate mail and stuff, but they also preach about everyone being equal and everyone being accepted. Also if they hate FSM so much why bother looking at the site??

    It’s because they are full of sh*t. (shortest and most accurate sentence I could think of )

  4. nikkiee says:

    @Fr. Corpus Callosum Oct 31st, 2006 at 8:26 pm
    Do we have to wash the spaghetti pot in heaven, or is that done for us miraculously?
    Maybe thats what those in FSM hell do?
    Iwill be a good pastafarian!! I will be a good pastafarian!!
    RAmen! RAmen! RAmen!

  5. Max Globs says:

    I think it’s very funny. Since humor is subjective, your point is moot. Sucks to be you, Mister Illogical!

  6. Branded Cow says:

    @Dunc: hmmm… Well lets start, rationality and reason aside, and a big spoon of pasta coated with marinara consumed. mmmm… That hit the spot. This spaghetti originated in the far east and was brought west to Italy along the trade routes constructed by the Kahn dynasty in the 13th century. The tomatoes in this marinara were dragged from the “New World” to Italy by Cortez in the 16th century. The meal was put together who knows when, but how can the FSM exist if mankind has been going on for a couple millenia before spaghetti was created?

  7. Anthony says:

    I believe that to really achieve credibility as a religion that the FSM needs some serious heretics to persecute. I therefore propose the Lasagnaist Heresy which proposes that while essentially the same substance, Our Deity is not Noodly but flat. Once there are enough adherents then we can all happily proceed with all the fun stuff like burning Lasagnaists at the Steak(sorry) and excommunications.

  8. Aldous says:

    “How can the FSM exist if mankind has been going on for a couple millenia before spaghetti was created?”

    Do you really think that men have created spaghetti? Of course not. Our ancestors’ hands have been guided by His Noodly Appendage when He considered it was a good time for us to discover His delicious image.
    It cannot be correct to believe that the FSM has created pasta according to His own looks. If this was the case, all spaghetti would be invisible – how would we ever know when they’re al dente? The fact that He gave us VISIBLE spaghetti is just another piece of evidence of how clever and benevolent His Noodliness really is.

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