Think about this, asshole….

Published August 19th, 2006 by Bobby Henderson

Only two defining forces have ever offered to die for you:

Jesus Christ and the American G.I.

One died for your soul, the other for your freedom.

79 Responses to “Think about this, asshole….”

  1. Peter says:

    “So, no one has ever seen God, huh? Look at the stars in the sky, the whales in the ocean, or the sun setting in the west. Do you think some “big bang” made that…”
    Posted by: Tyler | August 19, 2006 at 09:58 PM


    Unless of course you believe ‘brane theory, which is another possibility. There may be others I’m not aware of, but I’m a biologist, so I’m not very up on it.

  2. Dino says:

    I support our troops, well, all except for Tyler. I hope the Flying Spaghetti Monster removes his noodly appendage from atop Tylers head and allows his to float off into the ether. Tyler doesn’t deserve the FSM’s gift of gravity. Or his whales either, for that matter.

    …plus, someone should tell Tyler that Jesus was a terrorist who came with a sword to destroy the dominant religion of his day… kind of like a Pirate but without the all important eye patch.

  3. Allen says:

    Short and sweet.

    “Only two defining forces have ever offered to die for you:

    Jesus Christ and the American G.I.

    One died for your soul, the other for your freedom.”

    There is only one difference, one actually exists.

    I support the troops, however I have yet to see any “freedom fighting” in Iraq. Terrorists that blow themselves up in the middle of a market have nothing to do with defending my and everyone elses freedom. I support the troops, I dont support the actions of the government.

    I bring to you a radio clip.

    “Jesus isnt real, he’s make believe!”

  4. Secret says:

    I always find these kind of comments which invoke the guilt attempt “Jesus died for you” amusing. Soo, we all have free will, but the roman soldiers had to nail Jesus up, because your God had to get killed by humans for you?

    Wait, let’s fall back to that point. You had this wonderful living god wandering around, he got nailed up by some unbelievers, and you make the nailing a central part of your religion?

  5. Roy says:

    As Ghandi said “I like your Christ, but I don’t like your Christians: they are so unlike your Christ.”

    Christ said love thy neighbour and died so people would follow his teachings. Your actions, and the actions of the majority of the “Christian” community, imply that you only care about being right. His teachings seem to mean nothing to you.

  6. Reed Braden says:

    Actually, there are several. Christ died for my sins. The army dies for my freedom. My mom died for my childbirth. My would-be twin was aborted for my life. My sister jumped in front of a truck to save me. My dad took a bullet for me. An FBI agent was tortured o death and never revealed my location. Ronald Reagan died because I wished him to. My friend, Bruce, dyed his pubes for me. I started a cult and over 24 families drank the punch and died for me. Several baby cows died for my veal cutlets last night. Those baby cows’ moms died for the chair I’m sitting in. A horse died for the glue I sniffed last night. Several cats were killed to grease up the strings on my violin. A few deer have died purely for my entertainment.

    So yeah… you can’t count.

  7. Fluge says:

    God this, Jesus that.
    What about the other religions?
    What about the Buddhists? Are they wrong for believing in another God? What about the Hindus? Hell, the Aztecs? they didn’t know any better, either.
    What makes one religion right over the others?

    Here’s one: What if Christianity was the wrong religon? what if another religion was right all along, but Christians converted those believers? We would be screwed then, now wouldn’t we?

  8. mikeydoherty says:

    what i dont understand is why u think a monster made out of noodles made our fucking world i mean everyone had the right to believe what they want but what the fuck you are making a belief about how we are created by something that we created maybe im missing some vast infromation that would explain a god of pasta who created us and everything here

    all i know is that were here somehow someway but how do u believe that your savior is a giant fucking pile of food its just a little fucked up to me

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