Congratulations, bastard. You’ve figured out

Published September 2nd, 2005 by Bobby Henderson

Congratulations, bastard. You’ve figured out how to manipulate a million people. What are you going to do next? Ask the government for no taxes because of your so-called-religion? Look, only someone with the mind of a two year old would think of doing something like this. If you file a lawsuit against and government offices you will do nothing but prove your own stupidity and deprive children from learning because schools are underfunded as is. What you are doing is truly asinine and I hope you realize the error of your ways soon. And by the way, your case would not hold in court, mainly because no judge in his right mind is going to buy this bullshit. Maybe you should try to convert bush, he is a two year old too is he not? Also, feel free to kill yourself.

Sincerely, james aladar

17 Responses to “Congratulations, bastard. You’ve figured out”

  1. DutchPastaGuy says:

    Is there any page with an index of all the old threads?

  2. Wench Nikkiee says:

    Good for a bit of nostalgia :))
    Must not have been many posters back then for it to stay so clean.

  3. Wench Nikkiee says:

    DPG Archives link on top of page :)

  4. Peter Popoff says:

    DPG, this is the only index I’m aware of…

  5. Jean Bart says:

    Are you going to check all the “clean” threads? Aha, I see: you’re busy on a huge election campaign for PP, recruting lots of new Pastafarians, telling them they have to sharpen their wit on hate-mail threads, and then let them loose on the old clean threads you’re going to dig up now. Oh boy (ducky voice), THAT will surely kill B.’s server for good! But it’s for the noble cause: PP for Prez!

  6. Rowdy Wench says:

    @ Peter – “I wish this keyboard would hold still.” Wahahahaha!!!! I’ve had that problem myself, and am darned close to losing the cooperation of mine (again) at the moment!

    @ DPG – Brilliant, my friend, brilliant! I can’t explain all the ways my life is better since I’ve been touched! :)

  7. Wench Beth says:

    To James Aladar… wow, has the FSM really touched a million people?! That is fantastic! I thought we were up to only about 100,000 so far. His powers are truly awesome!
    Personally, I think you should join us. We are a bonafide religion and welcome all kinds of people, even ones filled with hate like yourself. You will soon find yourself letting go of the evil in your heart and saying things like “Arrrrr!” and “Where’s the ale?” and “Cool, we get Fridays off as a legitimate FSM holiday!”
    Yeah, I know Mr. Aladar will never read this, but it’s fun to pretend :)

  8. c-dizzle says:

    peter popoff is such an asshole, i called for the miracle spring water and i got all this paper work, it’s a fucking riot reading his bullshit always makes me laugh, I get mail from him like every 2 months or so…I haven’t sent him any money because that would just be stupid but i have sent him monopoly money…still waiting for a reply.

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