Comments on: FSM Blesses the University of Maryland http://www.venganza.org Sun, 21 Mar 2010 09:55:38 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.2 hourly 1 By: Sparks http://www.venganza.org/spread-the-word/u-of-maryland/#comment-788661 Sparks Sun, 19 Apr 2009 04:10:41 +0000 http://www.venganza.org/wordpress/spreading-the-word-placeholder/fsm-blesses-the-university-of-maryland/#comment-788661 I now am a believer in the Celestial Teapot, a rather large teapot that orbits the Sun somewhere between Mars and Jupiter. Our spiritual leader, Lord Lipton held a press conference about it all the other day. Question: Where did all this start? Answer: About 2 thousand years ago a few blokes in a very primitive tribe, got together for a fun night with a prostitute and a lot of very good mushrooms. During the night they had a vision of a baby teapot (a miracle itself seeing they did not know what tea was, let alone teapots). Of course the next morning, when the mushrooms had worn off, and the teapot actually turned out to be a kettle they knew the truth, but they had already written the “story of the teapot”. About 300 years past until one day someone dug up the story in the rubbish tip and took it to his leader, King Con. At that time the kings power over the people was dwindling because they were getting tied of the same old stories about dragons, goblins and fairies He thought “This is a slightly more sophisticated story than the goblins and dragons, this will keep my dynasty going for a while. “ Since that time there have been numerus sightings, most have turned out to be kettles or pans but some go unexplained. Question: Is there any evidence that the teapot actually exists? Answer: None what so ever, except our faith, and you try to prove that the teapot does not exist. Question: OK, so how did the teapot get there, who created the teapot? Answer: The teapot did not have a creator and has been there forever, even before there was a sun for it to orbit around, even before there were cups of tea. Look around the universe, if you look hard enough you can see that everything is created in the image of the teapot. For instance non-believers think there is a star formation shaped like a saucepan but of course we know the truth. A human face is actually made in the teapots image, with two handles. Eg ears for handles, nose for spout. Question: There is no evidence that praying to the teapot has any effect at all, how do you justify the waste of time and money spent by the followers and supported by governments, on building churches and other monuments in the image of the teapot? Answer: How can you say that praying to the teapot does not work, when just the other day one of our congregation (Jane Smith) was diagnosed with testicular cancer? After weeks of our followers praying, she was told that she had been sent the wrong letter. Subsequent to this, John Smith, a non-believer died of testicular cancer, which proves what happens to those of little faith. There are many other stories like this miracle effecting people with all sorts of illness that have been diagnosed within our church. Of course those evil amputees aren’t amongst them because it’s their fault, they should have taken better care of the teapot’s work. Now that you have read this story, and you realize that it is complete nonsense, go back to the top, do a global search and replace with your Word Processing software, replacing “the teapot” with “god” and you will get an idea of how nieve and misguided Christians are. I now am a believer in the Celestial Teapot, a rather large teapot that orbits the Sun somewhere between Mars and Jupiter. Our spiritual leader, Lord Lipton held a press conference about it all the other day.

Question: Where did all this start?

Answer: About 2 thousand years ago a few blokes in a very primitive tribe, got together for a fun night with a prostitute and a lot of very good mushrooms. During the night they had a vision of a baby teapot (a miracle itself seeing they did not know what tea was, let alone teapots). Of course the next morning, when the mushrooms had worn off, and the teapot actually turned out to be a kettle they knew the truth, but they had already written the “story of the teapot”.
About 300 years past until one day someone dug up the story in the rubbish tip and took it to his leader, King Con. At that time the kings power over the people was dwindling because they were getting tied of the same old stories about dragons, goblins and fairies He thought “This is a slightly more sophisticated story than the goblins and dragons, this will keep my dynasty going for a while. “

Since that time there have been numerus sightings, most have turned out to be kettles or pans but some go unexplained.

Question: Is there any evidence that the teapot actually exists?

Answer: None what so ever, except our faith, and you try to prove that the teapot does not exist.

Question: OK, so how did the teapot get there, who created the teapot?

Answer: The teapot did not have a creator and has been there forever, even before there was a sun for it to orbit around, even before there were cups of tea. Look around the universe, if you look hard enough you can see that everything is created in the image of the teapot. For instance non-believers think there is a star formation shaped like a saucepan but of course we know the truth. A human face is actually made in the teapots image, with two handles. Eg ears for handles, nose for spout.

Question: There is no evidence that praying to the teapot has any effect at all, how do you justify the waste of time and money spent by the followers and supported by governments, on building churches and other monuments in the image of the teapot?

Answer: How can you say that praying to the teapot does not work, when just the other day one of our congregation (Jane Smith) was diagnosed with testicular cancer? After weeks of our followers praying, she was told that she had been sent the wrong letter. Subsequent to this, John Smith, a non-believer died of testicular cancer, which proves what happens to those of little faith.

There are many other stories like this miracle effecting people with all sorts of illness that have been diagnosed within our church. Of course those evil amputees aren’t amongst them because it’s their fault, they should have taken better care of the teapot’s work.

Now that you have read this story, and you realize that it is complete nonsense, go back to the top, do a global search and replace with your Word Processing software, replacing “the teapot” with “god” and you will get an idea of how nieve and misguided Christians are.

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]]> By: Anime http://www.venganza.org/spread-the-word/u-of-maryland/#comment-783771 Anime Mon, 13 Apr 2009 11:55:32 +0000 http://www.venganza.org/wordpress/spreading-the-word-placeholder/fsm-blesses-the-university-of-maryland/#comment-783771 I really liked your blog! Bookmarked :) keep up the great Work. Valuble Info. I really liked your blog! Bookmarked :) keep up the great Work. Valuble Info.

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]]> By: Some great Info http://www.venganza.org/spread-the-word/u-of-maryland/#comment-741601 Some great Info Thu, 19 Feb 2009 03:06:10 +0000 http://www.venganza.org/wordpress/spreading-the-word-placeholder/fsm-blesses-the-university-of-maryland/#comment-741601 Thanks for the info, definitely helped Thanks for the info, definitely helped

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]]> By: Katie http://www.venganza.org/spread-the-word/u-of-maryland/#comment-741598 Katie Thu, 19 Feb 2009 03:05:41 +0000 http://www.venganza.org/wordpress/spreading-the-word-placeholder/fsm-blesses-the-university-of-maryland/#comment-741598 thanks !! very helpful post! thanks !! very helpful post!

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]]> By: clint http://www.venganza.org/spread-the-word/u-of-maryland/#comment-703342 clint Tue, 16 Dec 2008 18:32:02 +0000 http://www.venganza.org/wordpress/spreading-the-word-placeholder/fsm-blesses-the-university-of-maryland/#comment-703342 this makes me want to go here this makes me want to go here

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]]> By: Chris http://www.venganza.org/spread-the-word/u-of-maryland/#comment-688393 Chris Sat, 29 Nov 2008 20:22:48 +0000 http://www.venganza.org/wordpress/spreading-the-word-placeholder/fsm-blesses-the-university-of-maryland/#comment-688393 First off i dont know if this will show up twice, my broswer is acting up. David B. you can get whatever u want on your dogtags as long as you are willing to fork over the $1-3 it costs to have them made at a store. I plan to head over to one of the iraqi shops and get a set for myself after my shift. RAmen First off i dont know if this will show up twice, my broswer is acting up.

David B. you can get whatever u want on your dogtags as long as you are willing to fork over the $1-3 it costs to have them made at a store. I plan to head over to one of the iraqi shops and get a set for myself after my shift.
RAmen

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]]> By: Chris http://www.venganza.org/spread-the-word/u-of-maryland/#comment-688378 Chris Sat, 29 Nov 2008 20:15:51 +0000 http://www.venganza.org/wordpress/spreading-the-word-placeholder/fsm-blesses-the-university-of-maryland/#comment-688378 Hey David B, U can get anything you want on your Dog Tags if ur willing to fork over the $1-3 it costs to goto a store and get them made up yourself. I plan to visit one of the Iraqi shops here after work and get two made up for me. Hey David B, U can get anything you want on your Dog Tags if ur willing to fork over the $1-3 it costs to goto a store and get them made up yourself. I plan to visit one of the Iraqi shops here after work and get two made up for me.

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]]> By: Giuls http://www.venganza.org/spread-the-word/u-of-maryland/#comment-610091 Giuls Tue, 02 Sep 2008 01:24:32 +0000 http://www.venganza.org/wordpress/spreading-the-word-placeholder/fsm-blesses-the-university-of-maryland/#comment-610091 This is lovely! I am delighted for the lucky students and staff at the University of Maryland! Keep on spreading the word! -Ramen Giuls This is lovely! I am delighted for the lucky students and staff at the University of Maryland! Keep on spreading the word!

-Ramen
Giuls

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]]> By: iphone games music http://www.venganza.org/spread-the-word/u-of-maryland/#comment-545510 iphone games music Sun, 20 Jul 2008 15:07:44 +0000 http://www.venganza.org/wordpress/spreading-the-word-placeholder/fsm-blesses-the-university-of-maryland/#comment-545510 Nice blog, i have added it to my favourites, greetings Nice blog, i have added it to my favourites, greetings

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]]> By: Wench Nikkiee http://www.venganza.org/spread-the-word/u-of-maryland/#comment-491799 Wench Nikkiee Sat, 14 Jun 2008 01:15:46 +0000 http://www.venganza.org/wordpress/spreading-the-word-placeholder/fsm-blesses-the-university-of-maryland/#comment-491799 Piratey Ninja Apr 9th, 2008 at 11:39 am "Pretty sure they’re just angry we get beer volcanoes and they don’t. *laughs merrily*" . Yep there's that...... and the fact the FSM has bigger balls! Piratey Ninja Apr 9th, 2008 at 11:39 am

“Pretty sure they’re just angry we get beer volcanoes and they don’t. *laughs merrily*”
.
Yep there’s that…… and the fact the FSM has bigger balls!

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]]> By: something http://www.venganza.org/spread-the-word/u-of-maryland/#comment-489941 something Thu, 12 Jun 2008 16:15:50 +0000 http://www.venganza.org/wordpress/spreading-the-word-placeholder/fsm-blesses-the-university-of-maryland/#comment-489941 really now pirates? the lack of pirates has caused global warming wow ... i never knew [sarcastic] this religion is mockery its stupid fsm really a monster made out of a Italian cuisine? thats not only a monster but flying to? wow you guys really thought out the box that time i would have never thought up anything ANYTHING like this really now pirates?
the lack of pirates has caused global warming wow … i never knew [sarcastic]
this religion is mockery its stupid fsm really a monster made out of a Italian cuisine? thats not only a monster but flying to?
wow
you guys really thought out the box that time
i would have never thought up anything ANYTHING like this

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]]> By: Reverend Noodles, Head of the Pastafarian Missionary Society http://www.venganza.org/spread-the-word/u-of-maryland/#comment-489155 Reverend Noodles, Head of the Pastafarian Missionary Society Thu, 12 Jun 2008 01:06:36 +0000 http://www.venganza.org/wordpress/spreading-the-word-placeholder/fsm-blesses-the-university-of-maryland/#comment-489155 The artwork is incredible. The FSM has truly blessed the artist with their talents to reveal His Noodly Goodness to the world. His works are all around us. May His Noodly Appendage bless you all, and the Chosen Linguini come upon us! R'Amen. The artwork is incredible. The FSM has truly blessed the artist with their talents to reveal His Noodly Goodness to the world. His works are all around us. May His Noodly Appendage bless you all, and the Chosen Linguini come upon us! R’Amen.

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]]> By: Piratey Ninja http://www.venganza.org/spread-the-word/u-of-maryland/#comment-374521 Piratey Ninja Wed, 09 Apr 2008 17:39:47 +0000 http://www.venganza.org/wordpress/spreading-the-word-placeholder/fsm-blesses-the-university-of-maryland/#comment-374521 Naw, Mr. Roboto. Pretty sure they're just angry we get beer volcanoes and they don't. *laughs merrily* Naw, Mr. Roboto. Pretty sure they’re just angry we get beer volcanoes and they don’t. *laughs merrily*

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]]> By: redtube http://www.venganza.org/spread-the-word/u-of-maryland/#comment-331005 redtube Mon, 10 Mar 2008 13:58:04 +0000 http://www.venganza.org/wordpress/spreading-the-word-placeholder/fsm-blesses-the-university-of-maryland/#comment-331005 It is the best what i saw, 4ever !!! It is the best what i saw, 4ever !!!

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]]> By: Mr Roboto http://www.venganza.org/spread-the-word/u-of-maryland/#comment-330696 Mr Roboto Mon, 10 Mar 2008 05:09:29 +0000 http://www.venganza.org/wordpress/spreading-the-word-placeholder/fsm-blesses-the-university-of-maryland/#comment-330696 FSM forever Nov 27th, 2007 at 5:41 am Why do people get so mad at us expressing our beliefs? Ummmm.. because it basically says that their beliefs are a lie. Everything that they have been taught about heaven, hell, the old man in the sky with a white beard, it's all a manifestation of someone who thought up the best way to control people. Fear that is. Ironicly it scares the sh*t out of them. FSM forever Nov 27th, 2007 at 5:41 am

Why do people get so mad at us expressing our beliefs?

Ummmm.. because it basically says that their beliefs are a lie. Everything that they have been taught about heaven, hell, the old man in the sky with a white beard, it’s all a manifestation of someone who thought up the best way to control people. Fear that is. Ironicly it scares the sh*t out of them.

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]]> By: probabilidades poker http://www.venganza.org/spread-the-word/u-of-maryland/#comment-329391 probabilidades poker Sat, 08 Mar 2008 18:55:32 +0000 http://www.venganza.org/wordpress/spreading-the-word-placeholder/fsm-blesses-the-university-of-maryland/#comment-329391 <strong>juego al instante pagina internet...</strong> Cada uno juego de poker gratis juego al instante portal... juego al instante pagina internet…

Cada uno juego de poker gratis juego al instante portal…

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]]> By: jeff http://www.venganza.org/spread-the-word/u-of-maryland/#comment-314385 jeff Sun, 17 Feb 2008 19:06:48 +0000 http://www.venganza.org/wordpress/spreading-the-word-placeholder/fsm-blesses-the-university-of-maryland/#comment-314385 Cole Field House is now a shrine! Clearly an intelligent being, only FSM could have performed the miracle of placing his likeness for all to see at this place, and He meant it as a sign to us all. He wants us to repent, to embrace pasta, and to speak out against the unspeakable decline of pirates. The anti-pasta took away sailships and gave us an age of steam to test us. It will not work. We will sail on and remember than FSM wants us to restore the oceans to the glory of old. Give me that old time religion, oh FSM. As an alum of (too) many years ago, I can only say I wish He had touched me with his noodly appendage years ago, when I was lost in a fog of meatball sauce and before I was found. The Mormons have Jackson County, Missouri, the Christians and Jews have Jerusalem, and now we have Cole Field House. The first Pasta shrine! Cole Field House is now a shrine! Clearly an intelligent being, only FSM could have performed the miracle of placing his likeness for all to see at this place, and He meant it as a sign to us all. He wants us to repent, to embrace pasta, and to speak out against the unspeakable decline of pirates. The anti-pasta took away sailships and gave us an age of steam to test us. It will not work. We will sail on and remember than FSM wants us to restore the oceans to the glory of old. Give me that old time religion, oh FSM.

As an alum of (too) many years ago, I can only say I wish He had touched me with his noodly appendage years ago, when I was lost in a fog of meatball sauce and before I was found.

The Mormons have Jackson County, Missouri, the Christians and Jews have Jerusalem, and now we have Cole Field House. The first Pasta shrine!

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]]> By: tom http://www.venganza.org/spread-the-word/u-of-maryland/#comment-253248 tom Fri, 07 Dec 2007 12:30:02 +0000 http://www.venganza.org/wordpress/spreading-the-word-placeholder/fsm-blesses-the-university-of-maryland/#comment-253248 As a Maryland Alum, I can only sit here and WISH the FSM was revealed to me when I was on campus. Cole Field House is in a very busy place - that's just the perfect venue for others to see and experience! I have been touched by the Noodly Appendages! Oh, by the way, what the heck is that Robin psycho writing about? MSU? It's NOT the Maryland State University... I only wish that Robin would find the peace and serenity we Pastafarians have come to experience. As a Maryland Alum, I can only sit here and WISH the FSM was revealed to me when I was on campus. Cole Field House is in a very busy place – that’s just the perfect venue for others to see and experience! I have been touched by the Noodly Appendages!

Oh, by the way, what the heck is that Robin psycho writing about? MSU? It’s NOT the Maryland State University… I only wish that Robin would find the peace and serenity we Pastafarians have come to experience.

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]]> By: MEE:] http://www.venganza.org/spread-the-word/u-of-maryland/#comment-252312 MEE:] Thu, 06 Dec 2007 08:55:53 +0000 http://www.venganza.org/wordpress/spreading-the-word-placeholder/fsm-blesses-the-university-of-maryland/#comment-252312 mmm this is the best thing i have EVER heard. i just saw this website 10 minutes ago tops. ive already converted 6 people to Pastafarian faith:] i LOVE this. and btw, robin you made me laugh. just so you know.. mmm
this is the best thing i have EVER heard.
i just saw this website 10 minutes ago tops.
ive already converted 6 people to Pastafarian faith:]
i LOVE this.

and btw, robin you made me laugh.
just so you know..

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]]> By: FSM forever http://www.venganza.org/spread-the-word/u-of-maryland/#comment-245415 FSM forever Tue, 27 Nov 2007 12:45:28 +0000 http://www.venganza.org/wordpress/spreading-the-word-placeholder/fsm-blesses-the-university-of-maryland/#comment-245415 and damn if only I could draw like that and damn if only I could draw like that

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