Theological question

Submit your scriptural writings for inclusion in the Loose Canon, and your tales of ancient FSM Lore, as well as any other FSM-related writing you may have.

Moderator: All Things Mods

Theological question

Postby Cardinal Fang on Tue May 08, 2007 1:59 pm

A dear friend of mine is aldehyde dehydrogenase deficient - in other words she is allergic to alcohol. She would like to know therefore - in Pastafarian heaven, are there any other beverages other than beer? She would be particularly happy if there was a fountain that gushed tea, as she is particularly partial to a nice cuppa (same as many of us Brits)

CF
Image
Cardinal Fang's Python Site
http://www.cardinalfang.net


My contact e-mail address is FAKE.
To contact me, my email is "latinum" at "hotmail" dot "com".
User avatar
Cardinal Fang
Gramigna Grand Admiral
 
Posts: 924
Joined: Sat Apr 07, 2007 7:46 pm
Location: A dungeon on Viltvodle VI

Postby EarthRise on Tue May 08, 2007 2:51 pm

Holy linguini, such a condition exists?

But, yeah, the FSM has everything up there. Heaven is pimped out, yo.
[...] the difficulty of believing that a perfect and complex eye could be formed by natural selection, though insuperable by our imagination, should not be considered as subversive of the theory.
-Darwin
User avatar
EarthRise
Hox God
 
Posts: 2330
Joined: Sun Aug 27, 2006 3:35 pm
Location: who wants to know?

Postby Cuddly_Carpy on Tue May 08, 2007 5:25 pm

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm teaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Image
User avatar
Cuddly_Carpy
Cannelloni Cannoneer
 
Posts: 135
Joined: Fri Dec 08, 2006 4:50 pm
Location: Dumpstable

Re: Theological question

Postby Duke on Tue May 08, 2007 11:55 pm

Cardinal Fang wrote:A dear friend of mine is aldehyde dehydrogenase deficient - in other words she is allergic to alcohol. She would like to know therefore - in Pastafarian heaven, are there any other beverages other than beer? She would be particularly happy if there was a fountain that gushed tea, as she is particularly partial to a nice cuppa (same as many of us Brits)

CF


It being heaven and al, I'm sure she would be cured of her allergy by His Benevolence. But yes, there are drinks galoré Up There, everything from piña coladas to hot chocolate.


Duke
"In the first place, God made idiots. That was for practice. Then he made school boards."

--Mark Twain


He who fights with monsters might take care lest he thereby become a monster. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you.

--Friedrich Nietzsche


"If it turns out that there is a God, I don't think that he's evil. But the worst that you can say about him is that basically he's an underachiever."

--Woody Allen
User avatar
Duke
Prophet of Pastafarianism
 
Posts: 8483
Joined: Thu Oct 27, 2005 4:17 am
Location: Under a Large Pile of Snow

Postby jbender23 on Thu Mar 06, 2008 8:20 pm

Yeah, I'm pretty sure if Heaven didn't have coffee, I would freak out and explode or something.
"It never got weird enough for me" - Dr. Hunter S. Thompson
User avatar
jbender23
Conchigliette Convert
 
Posts: 6
Joined: Thu Jan 10, 2008 7:39 pm
Location: Wrapped tightly in His noodly appendages.

Postby Moral Minority on Fri Mar 07, 2008 5:08 am

Does Heaven have Carlsberg?
User avatar
Moral Minority
Prophet of Pastafarianism
 
Posts: 5629
Joined: Sun Jul 01, 2007 5:51 pm
Location: Follow the trail of smoldering bodies.

Postby Detective TurtleHolmes on Fri Mar 07, 2008 5:31 am

Does Heaven have cheese? I couldn't go an afterlife without camembert, brie, cheddar, vintage...I'm going to get some cheese right now.
A flap of the wings yesterday means big changes tomorrow.
Let's work together to keep the present inevitable.

So yeah, I went and got a blog.
User avatar
Detective TurtleHolmes
Clouseau's Protege
 
Posts: 9266
Joined: Fri Oct 12, 2007 6:34 am
Location: Francemouth

Postby Clifford on Fri Mar 07, 2008 7:16 am

Heaven is for you, so why not any beverage?
Clifford

By the power invested in me by tabloid-reading imbeciles, I name you a pedo-dog!

The Pedo-Finder General

RAmen
User avatar
Clifford
Brewmeister
 
Posts: 1939
Joined: Tue Sep 11, 2007 4:50 am
Location: A Humble Student in Lunaticity

Postby bigblukiwi on Tue May 27, 2008 8:16 pm

I don't want to be picky, being a new convert and all, but shouldn't that be spelt TEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!
Yours in Scepticism
User avatar
bigblukiwi
Maccheroncelli Missionary
 
Posts: 42
Joined: Mon May 26, 2008 4:36 pm
Location: new zealand

Re: Theological question

Postby Roy Hunter on Sat Nov 15, 2008 6:55 pm

I don't want to start some sort of theological schism here (I'm thinking specifically about transubstantiation), but aldehyde dehydrogenase deficiency is an inherited genetic thang. When you get to heaven, do you still have your body? If not, you can get tore into the beers for the first time ever! Now that sounds like heaven to me...
"I don't mean to sound bitter, cynical or cruel; but I am, so that's how it comes out." ~ Bill Hicks.
"To argue with a person who has renounced reason is like administering medicine to the dead." ~ Thomas Paine.
"One should not believe everything one reads on the internet." ~ Abraham Lincoln.
"If you're making a political point wearing a balaclava, you're a c***. It was true for the IRA and it's true now." ~ daftbeaker.
User avatar
Roy Hunter
If it's not Scottish, it's crap.
 
Posts: 15537
Joined: Sun Nov 09, 2008 6:13 pm
Location: It's the place where you are, but that's not important right now.

Re: Theological question

Postby Cardinal Fang on Sun Nov 16, 2008 7:29 pm

You're also forgetting the whole British thing. Our metabolisms run on tea.

CF
Image
Cardinal Fang's Python Site
http://www.cardinalfang.net


My contact e-mail address is FAKE.
To contact me, my email is "latinum" at "hotmail" dot "com".
User avatar
Cardinal Fang
Gramigna Grand Admiral
 
Posts: 924
Joined: Sat Apr 07, 2007 7:46 pm
Location: A dungeon on Viltvodle VI

Re: Theological question

Postby Roy Hunter on Tue Nov 18, 2008 1:13 pm

Cardinal Fang wrote:You're also forgetting the whole British thing. Our metabolisms run on tea.

CF


Erm... I'm Scottish. My metabolism runs on beer. In Scotland, DEficiency in Aldehyde Dehydrogenase is known as 'DEAD' for short.
"I don't mean to sound bitter, cynical or cruel; but I am, so that's how it comes out." ~ Bill Hicks.
"To argue with a person who has renounced reason is like administering medicine to the dead." ~ Thomas Paine.
"One should not believe everything one reads on the internet." ~ Abraham Lincoln.
"If you're making a political point wearing a balaclava, you're a c***. It was true for the IRA and it's true now." ~ daftbeaker.
User avatar
Roy Hunter
If it's not Scottish, it's crap.
 
Posts: 15537
Joined: Sun Nov 09, 2008 6:13 pm
Location: It's the place where you are, but that's not important right now.

Re: Theological question

Postby aslanistheantipasta on Wed Nov 19, 2008 11:18 am

Oh of course, the beer volcano is only mentioned because it is the most important to the pirates as it is the holy drink. There are of course volcanoes of all beverages. There's even coke made with sugar rather than corn syrup.
aslanistheantipasta
Conchigliette Convert
 
Posts: 6
Joined: Sun Nov 09, 2008 1:24 pm


Return to Scripture and Lore

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest