However, in lunging for the football, Arseburn, never the most agile or nimble of men, had not only overturned his drink and ruined the nap of his new trousers, he had managed to crush a 1:100 perfect scale model of a Spanish Galleon to smithereens which Saucy Gert had set up earlier on the bar to dry.
Although the little skeleton men all thought this was hilarious, Saucy Gert was understandably outraged and not least because she recalled she had suggested Arseburn should vacate the establishment some paragraphs back.
"Why," she fumed, "You no good eejeet! Wait till I get my hands on you, I'll...
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