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Postby Sinoda on Mon Jan 02, 2006 8:07 pm

Though shall not eat "chicken" nuggets from fast-food restaraunts, as it is unpure.
What to put here....
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Postby teripie on Mon Jan 02, 2006 8:37 pm

Sinoda wrote:Though shall not eat "chicken" nuggets from fast-food restaraunts, as it is unpure.


Spoken truly as chickens eat their own poop.
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The 10 holy minor guidelines

Postby alt_phil on Mon Jan 02, 2006 8:38 pm

The 10 holy minor guidelines...

Thou shalt not quote B-rated movies at inappropriate times, especially when those amoungst you do not get the joke, for they have not seen it.

Thou shalt not be not sure, but think thou doesn't know.

Thou shalt not wonder why thine creator hast eyestalks.

Thou shalt remember thy 21st birthday only partially, and with some measure of embarrassment.

Thou shalt not send thy children to military school, for the pasta there is hideous.

Thou shalt not make jokes about My meat balls, unless thou wishes to feel a swift kick in your own.

Thou shalt remember the height of those holy unto Me, who are Mine enforcers. (See previous holy minor guideline)

Thou shalt not hurt thyself or others in manners that thou or they do not find appealing.

Thou shalt not bother counting these most holy minor guidelines, for thou has no right to contradict Me and My counting.
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Postby Sinoda on Mon Jan 02, 2006 8:42 pm

teripie wrote:
Sinoda wrote:Though shall not eat "chicken" nuggets from fast-food restaraunts, as it is unpure.


Spoken truly as chickens eat their own poop.


Actually, I was referring to the process of making "chicken" nuggets, but that works too.
What to put here....
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Re: The 10 holy minor guidelines

Postby teripie on Mon Jan 02, 2006 8:48 pm

alt_phil wrote:The 10 holy minor guidelines...

Nice avatar alt_phil! Be sure and let me know when your birthday is at this thread:
http://www.venganza.org/forum/viewtopic.php?t=2402
Welcome aboard!
-----(\ /)------
-----(o.o)-----
----(> <)-----
This is Bunny.
Bunny, as cute and cuddley as he may appear, is bent on world domination.
To achieve this he has decided to start by taking over teh intarweb, a step towards his ultimate goal.
To help him complete his quest and therefore ensure bunny domination, copy and paste him into your sig
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Re: The 10 holy minor guidelines

Postby alt_phil on Tue Jan 03, 2006 1:54 am

teripie wrote:Nice avatar alt_phil!


Arrr! Thank ye, me salty hearty matey!

There's actually a story behind my many faces of phil avatars. When I left my last place of employment, I foolishly left behind a funny-face picture of myself with my one eye all crossed. So my friends stuck it behind glass and daily drew on it with dry-erase markers. Then they took pictures and sent me the results. I have a few of them, and normally on other forums that allow offsite avatar linking, I setup my random.php script as my avatar to change the picture on each page load.
http://chlue.org/~phil/gifs/
Some of them really crack me up.
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Postby teripie on Tue Jan 03, 2006 12:50 pm

Too funny! Guess your exco-workers had a lot of time and talent on their hands. Pity there is no Dr. Phil.
-----(\ /)------
-----(o.o)-----
----(> <)-----
This is Bunny.
Bunny, as cute and cuddley as he may appear, is bent on world domination.
To achieve this he has decided to start by taking over teh intarweb, a step towards his ultimate goal.
To help him complete his quest and therefore ensure bunny domination, copy and paste him into your sig
User avatar
teripie
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Postby Skylow on Thu Mar 16, 2006 3:07 pm

Vengence belongs only to the Holy One. Should you happen upon a restaurant that serves pasta that is not up to the standard of the Holy One, simply deny that restaurant your business in the future. You shall not vandalize, burn, harass, or otherwise disturb the peace.

(Zealots come out of every religion. We might want to start keeping ours in check now.)
God, save me from your followers.
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Postby Sir Talos on Fri Mar 31, 2006 7:56 pm

Thou shalt honor thy mother and midgits; for thou was but a little person in the womb for nine months and midgits are but little persons their entire lives.

Thou shalt not insult a pirate to his face, even jokingly, for pirates possess the divine privilege to defend their pirate ego unless thou art prepared to offer a Holy meal of spaghetti and meatballs to said pirate. In which case he is required to accept both the Holy meal and the insult.

Thou shalt not design experiments or tests that thou feelest may support or denyth the existence of Myself or My Noodly Appendage. Thou will not be punished but will wasteth thy time for I will alter thy data anyway.

Thou shalt recognize that between pirates and ninjas, pirates are far superior beings. Additionally thou shalt vehemently argue this fact with ninja supporters regardless of actual objective evidence to the contrary should thou be presented with such.
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Postby Vasiliy on Mon Apr 03, 2006 3:56 pm

They aren't called commandants/suggestions now, now they're called "I'd really rather you didn'ts"


And Bobby made 8. Read the scripture!
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Postby Duke on Mon Apr 03, 2006 7:31 pm

Should we list them?

No, I think I am going to wait for someone more important to come down and list them.


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He who fights with monsters might take care lest he thereby become a monster. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you.

--Friedrich Nietzsche


"If it turns out that there is a God, I don't think that he's evil. But the worst that you can say about him is that basically he's an underachiever."

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Postby Tickle on Tue Apr 04, 2006 7:00 am

I like the ones here better anyway... :)
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Postby zyxyzx on Fri Dec 08, 2006 10:54 am

How's this one, inspired by another thread (http://www.venganza.org/forum/viewtopic.php?t=6918)

Thou shalt retain rational thought processes except in the course of hedonistic pleasures, or pursuit of the biological imperative, or both.
If they weren't witches we wouldn't have tried to burn them in the first place!
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Postby Al the Killer on Tue Jan 09, 2007 9:54 pm

Thou shalt not say ARRRRR just for the sake of it. Thou shalt say it with feeling.

Thou shalt not overcook thy noodles, for they get all mooshy and its just not cool.
the cake is a lie
the cake is a lie
the cake is a lie
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Postby Duke on Tue Jan 09, 2007 11:41 pm

Al the Killer wrote:Thou shalt not say ARRRRR just for the sake of it. Thou shalt say it with feeling.


Ramen! Ye must be conveyin' yer opinion of the matter at hand with thine ARRR!!!


Duke
"In the first place, God made idiots. That was for practice. Then he made school boards."

--Mark Twain


He who fights with monsters might take care lest he thereby become a monster. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you.

--Friedrich Nietzsche


"If it turns out that there is a God, I don't think that he's evil. But the worst that you can say about him is that basically he's an underachiever."

--Woody Allen
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