The Person Below Me

[black bart]

zzzzzzzzzzzz....what? who? where am I?

TPBM is writing songs in the style of Kraftwerk.

[DavidH]

More like Kraft cheese, in my case.

TPBM also goes for the weepy and the sentimental.

[black bart]

'You fill up my Jock Strap like a night in the forest...'

Nothing like a bit of crooning.

TPBM is a big Glen Campbell fan.

[Roy Hunter]

Actually, yes. Saw him twice - once at the Clyde Auditorium, once at the Glasgow Royal Concert Hall. Some of my friends went to see him the last time he played a few months ago, but it was really sad apparently. He was walking over to the wrong place to start singing, his mic stand was elsewhere, he sang verses twice, he needed a music stand with the words on...

TPBM hopes they die before they get old.

[black bart]

Well yes I kind of think that but then my dad was enjoying himself so much while we were on holiday...he even jumped off a boat into the sea at 82, perhaps it's not so bad. Glen Campbell has to be admired for still trying to do his stuff. Pete Townsend is still going strong after all.

TPBM wishes I would stop going on and on...

[Ravi Oli]

It's sweet Mate... we're used to it. btw you forgot Keef Richards... he looks to be at least 103.

TPBM once refused to sing for their supper.

[Mad Willyum Bonney]

Matey , ye neffer tride me mum's cookin ! If ye dud ye be singin' aritee ! In ta Porsche ling bole !

TPBM smokt a Porsche .

[Roy Hunter]

I used to have a motorbike that was built to do exactly that. 1978 Kawasaki Z-650 with a Z-750 barrels, pistons and cylinder head, extended swing arm, lowered front end and reduced gearing. It was painted matt black with rusty bits of chrome and lots of insulating tape hanging off it. It looked like a joke, but nevertheless it could smoke a Porsche away from the traffic lights. Of course, a quarter mile up the road the Porsche came wanging past you at 120mph, but that's not the point: this £400 bike could smoke a £40,000 Porsche away from the lights.

TPBM thinks that summer's here and the time is right for racing in the streets.

[Mad Willyum Bonney]

I am not that delusional Roy . One hour sleep per night and I can barely complete basic errands . No racing for a while .
I think I have a bunion on my left foot .

TPBM thinks I have an onion in my doc martin.

[black bart]

I heard some teenage girls the other day saying that Doc Martins are lesbian shoes!

TPBM likes comfortable foot wear but also likes a bit of style.

[la la]

That's why i alternate between my wonderfully warm and comfy ugg boots, and my lace-up high-heeled sexy boots, depending on my mood. And the weather.

TPBM suffers from seasonal depression.

[Almighty Doer of Stuff]

I think so. I often turn on all the lights in the middle of the day because the extra light makes me feel better.

TPBM walks backwards everywhere they go, occasionally stopping to spin around in a circle before continuing.

[Mad Willyum Bonney]

Matey oi be spinning round on me left side coz oi be trying to see wot oi cannot

TPBM had been willing me to post the above .

[Ravi Oli]

No I wasn't.... but I'm sure a few of us appreciate the encore Mate.

TPBM hasn't had a curtain call.

[Roy Hunter]

The roar of the greasepaint, the smell of the crowd...

TPBM was Assistant Stage Manager for their High School pantomime.