10,000 (more) Commandments

This board is NOT restricted access. Keep that in mind when you post.

Moderator: Other Stuff Mods

User avatar
Mad Willyum Bonney
Admiral of Incomprehensibility
Posts: 3841
Joined: Sat Dec 08, 2007 8:34 am
Location: Bedlam

Re: 10,000 (more) Commandments

Postby Mad Willyum Bonney » Mon Jun 25, 2012 12:45 pm

Whenst ye water ye lilac tree, giveth thy privy member a vigorous shake for the movements shalt preventeth a damp leg . If thou shaketh overly, washeth thy right hand afterwardeth.
Remembering St. John
Remembering Auntie DeeDee
Remembering Black Bart
Remembering Pieces o' Nine :cry:
Remembering Afterglo ( though he may no longer remember us )
An' tryin ta membarr warr oi poit me blastid spectaculls Dammit ! :furious:

User avatar
Roland Deschain
Sorcerer of Sauce
Posts: 3586
Joined: Thu Feb 11, 2010 2:13 pm
Location: BASE jumping off the Dark Tower.
Contact:

Re: 10,000 (more) Commandments

Postby Roland Deschain » Thu Jun 28, 2012 9:05 am

9167: Thou shalt shake vigorously only in private, or unless someone wisheth to watch.

9166: Thou shalt number thy commandments.
Roland Deschain - Half prophet, half gunslinger, all Pastafarian!

"Since Alexander Pearce escaped, over 250 people have disappeared in the Tasmanian wilderness. No remains have ever been found." - Dying Breed

User avatar
black bart
Resident Weevil
Posts: 25876
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2005 6:56 am
Location: London

Re: 10,000 (more) Commandments

Postby black bart » Fri Jun 29, 2012 7:23 am

9165: Thou shall knoweth the number of the beach and yey that number shall be Number One South Beach, Blackpool.
The smoke wafted gently in the breeze across the poop deck and all seemed right in the world.

User avatar
Eendje
Fusilli Fuselier
Posts: 177
Joined: Fri Jan 29, 2010 2:45 pm

Re: 10,000 (more) Commandments

Postby Eendje » Fri Jun 29, 2012 3:48 pm

9164 Thou shalt not place a 10 page long table in the midst of thy report, and still expect to receive a nice grade.
You have arrived at the end of yet another one of my pearls of wisdom. If you still have any questions regarding the subject, please don't hesitate to ask your friendly neighbour or relative. Not me. Chances of me actually having an answer for you are very low indeed.

User avatar
Roy Hunter
If it's not Scottish, it's crap.
Posts: 16226
Joined: Sun Nov 09, 2008 6:13 pm
Location: It's the place where you are, but that's not important right now.
Contact:

Re: 10,000 (more) Commandments

Postby Roy Hunter » Sat Jun 30, 2012 6:00 pm

Eendje wrote:9164 Thou shalt not place a 10 page long table in the midst of thy report, and still expect to receive a nice grade.
9163: Blessed are the Appendices.
9162: Appendices are also good for hiding outliers, methodological problems and other shit that didn't fit your hypothesis.
"I don't mean to sound bitter, cynical or cruel; but I am, so that's how it comes out." ~ Bill Hicks.
"To argue with a person who has renounced reason is like administering medicine to the dead." ~ Thomas Paine.
"One should not believe everything one reads on the internet." ~ Abraham Lincoln.
"If you're making a political point wearing a balaclava, you're a c***. It was true for the IRA and it's true now." ~ daftbeaker.

User avatar
Roland Deschain
Sorcerer of Sauce
Posts: 3586
Joined: Thu Feb 11, 2010 2:13 pm
Location: BASE jumping off the Dark Tower.
Contact:

Re: 10,000 (more) Commandments

Postby Roland Deschain » Sun Jul 01, 2012 6:22 am

9161: Thou shalt write they theses in the style of the Pastafarian Doctorate.
Roland Deschain - Half prophet, half gunslinger, all Pastafarian!

"Since Alexander Pearce escaped, over 250 people have disappeared in the Tasmanian wilderness. No remains have ever been found." - Dying Breed

User avatar
black bart
Resident Weevil
Posts: 25876
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2005 6:56 am
Location: London

Re: 10,000 (more) Commandments

Postby black bart » Mon Jul 02, 2012 6:13 am

9160: Thou shalt waiteth excitedly fer thee announcement of the discovery of thee Higgs Bosun on Wednesday...especially if thou art a Pirate an he owes ye money.
The smoke wafted gently in the breeze across the poop deck and all seemed right in the world.

User avatar
la la
Fusilli Fuselier
Posts: 144
Joined: Sat Jul 14, 2012 8:44 am
Location: Cape Town, South Africa
Contact:

Re: 10,000 (more) Commandments

Postby la la » Sun Jul 22, 2012 6:32 am

9159: Thou shalt always treat thy comely wench and/or thy pirate captain kindly, that they may be as a good wind in thy sail, advancing thee mightily.
"There's a hell of a good universe next door, let's go!" e e cummings

"And the new day was a great big fish." Terry Pratchett

"WHAT CAN THE HARVEST HOPE FOR, IF NOT FOR THE CARE OF THE REAPER MAN?" Terry Pratchett (yes again, I'm afraid. He's my absolute favourite author)

User avatar
DavidH
Tagliatelle Trainee Monk
Posts: 4550
Joined: Mon Jun 02, 2008 12:23 pm
Location: Herefordshire, Western England

Re: 10,000 (more) Commandments

Postby DavidH » Sun Jul 22, 2012 1:47 pm

9158: But thou shalt treat thy wench and thy captain with different sorts of kindness, lest thou be thought strange.
Image

User avatar
pieces o'nine
Look Upon Her Works, Ye Migyt, and Despair!
Posts: 8615
Joined: Fri Dec 21, 2007 9:21 am
Location: Ocean o'Sand
Contact:

Re: 10,000 (more) Commandments

Postby pieces o'nine » Sun Jul 22, 2012 2:49 pm

9157: Unkess thy wench and thy captain arrrgh one an thee sayme.
I will honor Monkey in my heart, and try to keep it all the year.
~Charles "Darwin" Dickens

User avatar
Roy Hunter
If it's not Scottish, it's crap.
Posts: 16226
Joined: Sun Nov 09, 2008 6:13 pm
Location: It's the place where you are, but that's not important right now.
Contact:

Re: 10,000 (more) Commandments

Postby Roy Hunter » Sun Jul 22, 2012 3:45 pm

9156: Ooh, there thou goest, bringing gender politics into it again...
"I don't mean to sound bitter, cynical or cruel; but I am, so that's how it comes out." ~ Bill Hicks.
"To argue with a person who has renounced reason is like administering medicine to the dead." ~ Thomas Paine.
"One should not believe everything one reads on the internet." ~ Abraham Lincoln.
"If you're making a political point wearing a balaclava, you're a c***. It was true for the IRA and it's true now." ~ daftbeaker.

User avatar
pieces o'nine
Look Upon Her Works, Ye Migyt, and Despair!
Posts: 8615
Joined: Fri Dec 21, 2007 9:21 am
Location: Ocean o'Sand
Contact:

Re: 10,000 (more) Commandments

Postby pieces o'nine » Mon Jul 23, 2012 12:36 pm

9155: 'Tis better than lettin blokes wot skips hacrost thee moors in skirrrrts settle everfing. Selah.
I will honor Monkey in my heart, and try to keep it all the year.
~Charles "Darwin" Dickens

User avatar
DavidH
Tagliatelle Trainee Monk
Posts: 4550
Joined: Mon Jun 02, 2008 12:23 pm
Location: Herefordshire, Western England

Re: 10,000 (more) Commandments

Postby DavidH » Mon Jul 23, 2012 1:10 pm

9154: And be sure that thy wench is truly comely, since wenches as don't henjoy it be no fun.
Image

User avatar
black bart
Resident Weevil
Posts: 25876
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2005 6:56 am
Location: London

Re: 10,000 (more) Commandments

Postby black bart » Tue Jul 24, 2012 9:21 am

9155: Thou shalt abide by thee Captain's rules wenst thou art on board an don't go hidin in no apple barrels to hadjust thine undies.
The smoke wafted gently in the breeze across the poop deck and all seemed right in the world.

User avatar
DavidH
Tagliatelle Trainee Monk
Posts: 4550
Joined: Mon Jun 02, 2008 12:23 pm
Location: Herefordshire, Western England

Re: 10,000 (more) Commandments

Postby DavidH » Sat Jul 28, 2012 9:26 am

9156: Thou shalt also moderate thy conduct when thou standest outside the barrel, for thou knowest not who may be on duty within.
Image


Return to “Games, Fun, and Jokes”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: Bing [Bot] and 3 guests