* On camera, a kerfuffle begins near the bar, escalating rapidly to a ruckus. *
ANNOUNCER VO: "Let's joyne William Muspratt, late ov HMS Bounty, an workin some overtime 'ere t'noight as a rovin reporrrghter, fer moor on this development."
WILLIAM MUSPRATT: "Good evenin, ladies an gennelemen -- umph, excuse me, ye grate lout! -- pyrates an wenches -- ooof! oi say! Watch ware yer going, man! Oi duzzint care if ye *are* warin a skirt, no cuttin in lyne!! -- Nommy knees an Also-Rans -- OI SAY! WATCH WARE YER SWINGIN THAT CRUTCH, SHORTY! -- Captains ov Industry an Captains ov -- HEY! ALL ROIGHT! ALL ROIGHT! OI'S HAD JUST ABOUT ENUFF OV YOU LOT! DON'T MAKE ME BREAK OUT ME CUTLASS AN TEACH YOU SOME MANNERS -- OUCH! -- ack -- "
ANNOUNCER VO: "Sorry 'bout that, hit appears as we've lost Muspratt... 'e disappeart hinto a melee wif thee very group 'e were sent t'hinter vyoo... Mebbe we'll come back ter 'im later...
"Meanwhoile, oi sees thee nommy knees be maykin there way back t'thee main venyoo, an thee spot loights arrrgh goin hup on thee dye-us in hantissipashun ov thee winner..."
DIE SPAMMERS DIE
'Tis now the very witching time of night,
When churchyards yawn and hell itself breathes out
Contagion to this world.
There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls. ~George Carlin