Invited to speak at a book club.

[Ermintrude]

I gave a close friend of mine a copy of The Gospel just after it came, it is now on her book clubs list and at I believe the end of March they will be discussing it. Interestingly the book club meets in a restaurant and there is always a "book club" three course meal on offer. As my friend is also the chef in the restaurant a themed menu would be appropriate and also she has invited me as a newly ordained minister to speak at the event.
First - The meal
- Starter - Perform a miracle http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uRfl_f75YtQ I have the ingredients and simple to do.
- Main course is Along with the spaghetti , with one dangling over the edge of the plate for his noodily appendage, Along with the two big meatballs representing his power, and pimento stuffed olves on cocktail stick as his eyes see all and all covered in tomato sauce for his blood. obvious - but should as a minister pray to his noodlyness for Transubstantiation to occur as these are not acolites.
- Well you could say Ramen but that's not really a desert – really stuck on this one, any ideas out there ?
Second - The talk
The challenge here is everyone will have read the book so should be familiar with The Gospel. My qualifications for talking, firstly an ordained minister of the FSM, secondly I have a degree in Physics. So what should I speak about ?
My first though is to talk about why the FSM is important to me and why I became a minister. So some things I could talk about, don’t want to make it boring and think I need to keep it between 5 and 10 mins at most but some topics…
• FSM in the real world. Austrian guy wearing a sieve. I can marry people, appearances and so on
• Science is science. Religion is religion.
One is belief based on proof and evidence, the other is belief based on faith and hearsay. And while they both have strong influences on each other they do not mix.
Important as well to make clear my respect for religion as in general it’s not the religion that causes the problems but the people interoperating the religion.
• Critical thinking. How the book demonstrates how bad arguments can be used as “proof” and what takes 5 minutes to “prove” using a bad logic takes an hour to correct. Also if I can did it out hand out a leaflet on proving E=MC2 using noodles and meatballs (I recall doing this on the Hyper Spaghetti Monster Theory science thread – anyone have an archive so I don’t have to work it out again)
• HATE. Why do religions generate so much in people, you can’t worship the FSM and hate another for their beliefs. Show some FSM hate mail - shocking how people are so worried about invisible pasta and meatballs that they want people to suffer eternal pain and suffering.
• Flimsy Moral Standards and why they are important,
E.g. should the heretical Truffled Tagiatelli Beast prove its existence by descending on Trafalgar Square with white truffles and pasta on offer, sorry, the meatballs go out the window.
Your suggestions on meal or talk or any other advice appreciated.

[Roland Deschain]

Hi Rev. Ermintrude. Interesting book club talk you are going to, especially along with the addition of the Holy Meal. Here are my thoughts:-

The Meal
There is no provision for transubstantiation within Pastafarianism, as He is made of pasta and meatballs, not flesh. Therefore, we are basically eating a proxy of Him when we partake of the Holy Meal. The praying is up to you. As long as it is suitably Pastafarian, I see no real issue with it. Dessert is difficult, as this is not provided for in any of the Holy texts that I know of. Maybe chocolate biscotti, mousse, or tiramisu would work?

The Talk
I would try to stress that there is no dogma within Pastafarianism, and that we accept anyone of any religion, as long as they are tolerant of others. Pastafarianism is meant to push against ignorance, and allow people to live their lives without fear. It does not order (I'd really rather you didn't), but encourages critical thinking and sensibility. Any sensible person reading the book should see this, and also be able to see through the humour to the message beneath it. I think that most religious beliefs go against what we know of science, but who are we to say that the supernatural, in whatever form, does not exist? I'd put the whole "religion and science do not mix" as more of a personal opinion, but also say that although there are still many questions, science will always work towards attempting to answer them.

Other than that, it's a great idea. Let us know how it goes, and what people think.