real fast math joke...

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Re: real fast math joke...

Postby gronank on Tue Jun 28, 2011 7:01 pm

f(x)=1 and g(x)=exp(x) was out walking one day. In the distance they saw a derivation operator, f(x) imediatly became worried and told g(x) that he prefered if they went another way. He said: "if he get's on me, I'll disapear". g(x) was rather comfortable but understood f(x) anxiety and said: "you can go another way but I'll walk this way, I wont disapear". So they parted and as g(x) aproached the derivation operator it sais: "Hi, I'm the derivation operator in respect of y"
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Re: real fast math joke...

Postby DavidH on Wed Jun 29, 2011 4:33 am

gronank wrote:What has a liberal arts degree in common with the imaginary constant? neither has any real value.


:furious: :nefyoobash: :cry:

There are three kinds of mathematicians: those who can add up, and those who can't. :moon: :lurk:
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Re: real fast math joke...

Postby black bart on Wed Jun 29, 2011 8:15 am

It's not a math joke but it's so bad I thought I'd share it with you all:

Johnny Depp goes grocery shopping.

When he gets home he manages to lose all his vegetables in the grocery cupboard.

He eventually finds the onions in the colander and the potatoes in the measuring jug but he can't find the carrots...

all of sudden Vanessa Paradis pops her head round the corner and says: It's the Pyrex that the carrots be in.
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Re: real fast math joke...

Postby gronank on Thu Jun 30, 2011 8:32 pm

Do you know the difference between a mathematician and a philosopher? A mathematician needs a pen, paper and a trash can for his work. A philosopher can do without the trash can.
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Re: real fast math joke...

Postby Qwertyuiopasd on Thu Jun 30, 2011 9:42 pm

gronank wrote:Do you know the difference between a mathematician and a philosopher? A mathematician needs a pen, paper and a trash can for his work. A philosopher can do without the trash can.


What's wrong with holding on to your discarded ideas for reference? :P
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Re: real fast math joke...

Postby black bart on Fri Jul 01, 2011 8:57 am

I've got one, I've got one...

Where do you weigh a pi

Ans: Over a Rainbow...Somewhere over a rainbow, weigh a pi...

I'll get my coat.
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Re: real fast math joke...

Postby pieces o'nine on Fri Jul 01, 2011 8:15 pm

ok, that ^ was funny :haha:
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Re: real fast math joke...

Postby Roy Hunter on Sat Jul 02, 2011 1:41 pm

There are 10 types of people in the world: those who understand binary; and those who don't.
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Re: real fast math joke...

Postby Rainswept on Sun Jul 03, 2011 8:09 am

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I believe it's time for mankind to set aside the crutch of religion and embrace morality born of reason and truth. Those crutches have long since proven treacherous when the ground gets slippery.
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Re: real fast math joke...

Postby Tigger_the_Wing on Sun Jul 03, 2011 9:27 pm

Roy Hunter wrote:There are 10 types of people in the world: those who understand binary; and those who don't.


There are 11 types of people in the world: those who understand binary; those who don't; and those who think that this joke works when you read it aloud.
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Re: real fast math joke...

Postby gronank on Mon Jul 04, 2011 3:45 am

^I think the third group is a subset of the first
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Re: real fast math joke...

Postby Rainswept on Mon Jul 04, 2011 9:22 am

^ not necessarily. Depends on if you count LtCmdr Data as a person.
I believe it's time for mankind to set aside the crutch of religion and embrace morality born of reason and truth. Those crutches have long since proven treacherous when the ground gets slippery.
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Re: real fast math joke...

Postby gronank on Mon Jul 04, 2011 12:00 pm

^person perhaps, but not necessarily people
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Re: real fast math joke...

Postby PKMKII on Tue Jul 26, 2011 6:44 pm

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"How is it that hardly any major religion has looked at science and concluded, 'This is better than we thought! The Universe is much bigger than our prophets said, grander, more subtle, more elegant. God must be even greater than we dreamed'? Instead they say, 'No, no, no! My god is a little god, and I want him to stay that way.'" - Carl Sagan

"To doubt everything or to believe everything are two equally convenient solutions; both dispense with the necessity of reflection." - Henri Poincaré
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Re: real fast math joke...

Postby gronank on Tue Jul 26, 2011 7:33 pm

Why can't you use the latin "Kalium" instead? it makes for much simpler mnemonics. Another silly example is the use of "Tungsten" (which translates into heavy stone, mind you) instead of "Wolfram".
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