The Captain's Log

[Nef Yoo BlackBeard]

deer capinz log
rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
i bin tha fissil broo masser fer alon tyme now
i brood lotz ove difrint bludz
sum ove me cussamerz cuss a lot
but mose ove tha peepull dat fald ill ar still alife
i b sooo wellfy now
yu muss see alla coynz an buttinz an shiny rox i haz!
hiphipharraaaaa
rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
now i haz alla stuff fer ta broo ale
i pillij alla et frum unca Farts garrrrrrdin
alla haffa du iz ta git sum yeest
rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
i dunt no wort dis yeest iz
but unca DAvee sez
alla gurlz et Missis FiFis Howze haz sum yeest thay wanna gitn rid ove

i gunna fine coconut cup ta poot tha yeest in
byby capinz log

[black bart]

Capn's Log Yarr date etc etc

I be seein double. I be spyin two Nef Yoo's an a Willyum Bonny orf thee Cape!

[DaveL]

Yarrrr date 17.12.1707

Oi've upset the Royal Navy with me new whistleblower newspaper, 'Piri-leaks.'

Oi have a few problems though:

1. Some people like Nefyoo think it's a place to blow whistles and me ears are still ringin'.
2. Some people think Piri-leaks is a place to air your grievances over bad plumbing - Bustling Brian keeps getting mentioned.

Anyway, all those charges they trumped up against me visitin' Madame Fifi's are completely false. Oi was at home with me Missus that night.

[DavidH]

If ye wants ter stay out o' jail, ye has ter pay 20,000 gold Dubloons and wear a leg-iron and report to thee bo'sun every hour and surrender yer piratin' sustificate and promise not to leave thee ship. And sleep alongside o' that funny bloke.

In other words, yer a free man.

[daftbeaker]

If ye wants ter stay out o' jail, ye has ter pay 20,000 gold Dubloons and wear a leg-iron and report to thee bo'sun every hour and surrender yer piratin' sustificate and promise not to leave thee ship. And sleep alongside o' that funny bloke.

Bart does most of those things anyway

[black bart]

Represent Black Bart!!!!!! It's enough to make your hair curl... I think my eyes are bulging...tell me eyes aren't bulging!

[DaveL]

23.12.1707

Twas 2 nights before Xmas, and all through the bunker...
DaveL was looking for Santa and was just getting drunker...
The shells were all loaded, the search lights were lit...
Nefyoo was peerin' through his spy glass, doin' his bit...

[black bart]

Capn's Log 7.1.1770

Storm whippin in from thee South West, Shyppe listen ta starboard, Crew listin ta Leeward...

Overdone thee holiday celebrashuns...grog all gone...

Mutinee in thee air...smell o Fyshe Ed Stoo in thee air...don't know which be worse...

Must sight land soon...


Ooh ang on a minute...we aint left Port yet!

[DaveL]

23.12.1707

Twas 2 nights before Xmas, and all through the bunker...
DaveL was looking for Santa and was just getting drunker...
The shells were all loaded, the search lights were lit...
Nefyoo was peerin' through his spy glass, doin' his bit...

YArrrr...Did we hit 'im lads? Oi just emerged from me self inflicted coma hic

[black bart]

I spied this image on thee shyppe's telescope...tis conclusive proof:

[DaveL]

YArrrr...

As ye sure that's not you in costume Barty?

[black bart]

Capn's Log Yarr date 1724
Position: Nor by Nor West, South of Krakatoa
Gold reserves low
Rum all gone

God it's hot.

Me an thee croo were polishin the Solid Gold Jim Lad awards when summat really strange appened...all thee shyppe's lights went out and when I'd sent Blind Pew around to relight them wiv a damp match...ye wouldn't believe it, they was ALL GONE!!!!

What could ave appened to them?

Oh well I'll get thee Shyppe's Carpenter to knock up some wooden ones, paint em gold, no one will notice.

[black bart]

Capn's Log Yarr date 1724
Position: Nor by Nor West, South of Krakatoa
Gold reserves low
Rum all gone

God it's hot.

Me an thee croo were polishin the Solid Gold Jim Lad awards when summat really strange appened...all thee shyppe's lights went out and when I'd sent Blind Pew around to relight them wiv a damp match...ye wouldn't believe it, they was ALL GONE!!!!

What could ave appened to them?

Oh well I'll get thee Shyppe's Carpenter to knock up some wooden ones, paint em gold, no one will notice.

[pieces o'nine]

Yarrrgh, hit seems thee landlubbers be catchin hup t'thee pyratickal sense o'style.

Now me crewe will awl be clammerin' fer a Pyrate Themed Bedroom hinstead ov theyre yewshull quarters! An oi jest shut theyre gobs regarrrghdin moor Pyrate Scout Cookies -- wot next!


Fer those wot cant see thee links:

Designer Steve Kuhl created this one-of-a-kind pirate ship bedroom for a client's six year old son. It features an incredible floating ship, rope bridge, and secret 55 foot slide. Photo courtesy Steve Kuhl/kuhldesignbuild . com

A full grown man crosses the rope bridge into the ship. The rope bridge is connected to the top of the jail cell, built to accommodate evil doers, thieves and little sisters.

Here, designer Steve Kuhl sits at the helm of the ship. The rope descends into the closet below for quick wardrobe changes.

The crows nest was constructed using a ten inch hand-hewn timber for extra strength. Not seen here is a bed where important friends may get to sleep.

[Nef Yoo BlackBeard]

Capins Lug yarrday, um, fridy I fink?

Deer dyrie,

I yam owt of thee bilj agen. Unco Farty be drunk till mundy at lease, so hi fink hi safe fer now.

Fank ye, ye welkum.