How many people have read the bible?

Book discussions, Author discussions, general book talk, also films.

Moderator: Other Stuff Mods

Re: How many people have read the bible?

Postby PKMKII on Wed Sep 15, 2010 4:54 pm

Oh, and hemorrhoids.
User avatar
PKMKII
Senior New York Correspondent
 
Posts: 10837
Joined: Wed Jan 14, 2009 6:13 pm
Location: Where the Sun don't shine

Re: How many people have read the bible?

Postby black bart on Thu Sep 16, 2010 5:57 am

Qwertyuiopasd wrote:It's a great resource. It's an entertaining way to read what can be a really boring mass of text.

I just like how God smites people mostly through literally going down with an axe and killing them.



It seems to be mostly jets of fire being used at first but then he branches out into cool things like serpents, plagues and floods. I love the talking donkey.
User avatar
black bart
Resident Weevil
 
Posts: 25876
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2005 6:56 am
Location: London

Re: How many people have read the bible?

Postby Roy Hunter on Thu Sep 16, 2010 9:55 am

black bart wrote:I love the talking donkey.
You're not confusing The Bible and Shrek again, are you Bart?
User avatar
Roy Hunter
If it's not Scottish, it's crap.
 
Posts: 15787
Joined: Sun Nov 09, 2008 6:13 pm
Location: It's the place where you are, but that's not important right now.

Re: How many people have read the bible?

Postby Tigger_the_Wing on Thu Sep 16, 2010 10:30 am

Roy Hunter wrote:
black bart wrote:I love the talking donkey.
You're not confusing The Bible and Shrek again, are you Bart?


I doubt it. Shrek is plausible.
User avatar
Tigger_the_Wing
She Who Gets It
 
Posts: 4388
Joined: Wed Dec 17, 2008 7:44 pm
Location: Pyrate of the Canberrean

Re: How many people have read the bible?

Postby black bart on Thu Sep 16, 2010 11:27 am

Roy Hunter wrote:
black bart wrote:I love the talking donkey.
You're not confusing The Bible and Shrek again, are you Bart?


:lol:

If you'd told me there were Green Ogres in the Bible I wouldn't have believed you...but now it would be no surprise to me.
User avatar
black bart
Resident Weevil
 
Posts: 25876
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2005 6:56 am
Location: London

Re: How many people have read the bible?

Postby Clifford on Thu Sep 16, 2010 4:46 pm

I got stuck about halfway through genesis. The relentless descriptions of how long people lived and inconsistency in the tale telling just wore my intellectual stamina down.
User avatar
Clifford
Brewmeister
 
Posts: 1939
Joined: Tue Sep 11, 2007 4:50 am
Location: A Humble Student in Lunaticity

Re: How many people have read the bible?

Postby pieces o'nine on Thu Sep 16, 2010 8:38 pm

Clifford wrote:I got stuck about halfway through genesis. The relentless descriptions of how long people lived and inconsistency in the tale telling just wore my intellectual stamina down.


Ha-HA!

Their clever ploy was working!
I will honor Monkey in my heart, and try to keep it all the year.
~Charles "Darwin" Dickens
User avatar
pieces o'nine
Look Upon Her Works, Ye Migyt, and Despair!
 
Posts: 8615
Joined: Fri Dec 21, 2007 9:21 am
Location: Ocean o'Sand

Re: How many people have read the bible?

Postby black bart on Fri Sep 17, 2010 6:40 am

The inconsistency comes out just as well in the brick testament...the bible just doesn't make any logical sense. Why does god keep gathering together his chosen people, giving them such wonderous things as talking donkeys and the ability to commit genocide one minute and then the next he kills the lot of them off and starts again. Sodom and Gomorrah had it coming though, I've got no problem with that...no town should treat it's visitors like that.
User avatar
black bart
Resident Weevil
 
Posts: 25876
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2005 6:56 am
Location: London

Re: How many people have read the bible?

Postby black bart on Tue Sep 21, 2010 9:50 am

Just been reading the Exodus section of the Brick testament and in one of the Egyptian panels you can clearly see a pair of Ja Ja Binks statues behind the pharaoh.
User avatar
black bart
Resident Weevil
 
Posts: 25876
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2005 6:56 am
Location: London

Re: How many people have read the bible?

Postby Ubi Dubium on Wed Sep 22, 2010 1:49 pm

I love how they have the Pharaoh's cat in there too. Ane the lovely thought balloons from the Pharaoh about his dead livestock. You know, the ones that all died in a plague, then got killed by hail and broke out in boils before all their firstborn died again. The Brick Testament totally rocks. Be sure to read the story about Dinah in there too. Great stuff.
User avatar
Ubi Dubium
Mystic of Meatball
 
Posts: 2563
Joined: Mon Aug 11, 2008 2:10 pm
Location: This is my brain, and I live in it.

Re: How many people have read the bible?

Postby black bart on Fri Sep 24, 2010 6:58 am

Ubi Dubium wrote:I love how they have the Pharaoh's cat in there too. Ane the lovely thought balloons from the Pharaoh about his dead livestock. You know, the ones that all died in a plague, then got killed by hail and broke out in boils before all their firstborn died again. The Brick Testament totally rocks. Be sure to read the story about Dinah in there too. Great stuff.


The cat is sitting on the Pharoah's lap like a Bond Villain:

Image
User avatar
black bart
Resident Weevil
 
Posts: 25876
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2005 6:56 am
Location: London

Re: How many people have read the bible?

Postby PKMKII on Mon Oct 04, 2010 6:22 pm

Well I made good on the notion, and I am now reading through the Bhagavad Gita. Only real problem with it is that I have the "Bhagavad Gita As It Is" translation/version, which is ironically named because for every sentence-long verse, there's a few paragraphs of analysis. So I'm skipping the analysis, because it's both distracting to switch between the two, and quite frankly I just want to know what the "holy" bits say, and not some guy's opinion of them. Which does create the illusion that I'm reading the book really, really fast.

So far, it's not a bad read. Yeah, there's a lot of Krsna repeatedly saying he is the Supreme Personality of the Godhead, and some mildly misogynistic comments, although nothing as bad as the Judaic-based religions. It does spend a lot of time talking about work, of which it has an interesting take: do your work, do it well, but don't concern yourself with the results. Being attached to the results turns work into bondage. It also spends a lot of time arguing for intellectual/spiritual stimulation over purely sensational (in the literal sense of the word) stimulation, which obviously got inherited into Buddhism.

There's also something rather unique in it, as far as holy books are concerned. "Krsna" actually addresses materialistic philosophies directly, not just under a general lumping of "non-believers" like most books. He even offers a materialistic argument for handling the grief of death. Now obviously he discredits the atheistic notions, but this raises a weird paradox. If this was truly the word of Krsna, if it's a recording of an actual conversation between the Supreme Personality of the Godhead and Arjuna, why would he need to address these arguments? He's the Godhead on earth, shouldn't a simple miracle or two suffice to disprove the atheists? It's almost as if it's a very subtle admission by the writers of the book that isn't a literally true story, but rather a metaphor or allegory. If it is interpreted as an argument rather than a documentation, then it makes sense. Otherwise, it's just nonsensical.
User avatar
PKMKII
Senior New York Correspondent
 
Posts: 10837
Joined: Wed Jan 14, 2009 6:13 pm
Location: Where the Sun don't shine

Re: How many people have read the bible?

Postby black bart on Tue Oct 05, 2010 9:26 am

PKMKII/Krsna wrote:

do your work, do it well, but don't concern yourself with the results


That is good advise but will affect your chances of getting a bonus?
User avatar
black bart
Resident Weevil
 
Posts: 25876
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2005 6:56 am
Location: London

Re: How many people have read the bible?

Postby Qwertyuiopasd on Tue Oct 05, 2010 10:29 am

Not really. How well you do something is little affected by how concerned you are with the results.

I may be wrong in my interpretation, but here's a crack at an example. Making a chair, good ol' carpentry and expert handiwork, that kind of thing. Focus on the doing of the actions, focus on making the chair, and all that is involved. But don't worry about making a great chair, don't try to make a chair that will amaze people, or make you a lot of money, or anything. Forget the end goal, live in the present, and just make the chair well ("well" augmenting "make" in this instance, not "chair"). Most likely, the chair will come out good anyway. I mean, unless you just shouldn't be making chairs, in that case, look for a different job. XD
User avatar
Qwertyuiopasd
Admirable Admiral Qwerty
 
Posts: 14353
Joined: Wed Sep 14, 2005 5:38 pm
Location: Northern Virginia

Re: How many people have read the bible?

Postby Roy Hunter on Tue Oct 05, 2010 11:21 am

It is an attitude that is quite often used in beating addictions (amongst other things): don't think about the goal, because it will feel too ambitious and distant, and you will fail; instead think about the process, living your life today, this moment right now, and the goal will take care of itself.

Also useful in getting through college or university without going mad. :idiot:
User avatar
Roy Hunter
If it's not Scottish, it's crap.
 
Posts: 15787
Joined: Sun Nov 09, 2008 6:13 pm
Location: It's the place where you are, but that's not important right now.

PreviousNext

Return to Books and Authors, Films and Directors

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 3 guests