Proper salutation?

The place for general discussion about the Flying Spaghetti Monster and most things related to Him.

Moderator: All Things Mods

Re: Proper salutation?

Postby Qwertyuiopasd on Tue Mar 30, 2010 7:29 pm

Ham Nox wrote:4d. Theory of gravity


The core is hot and space is cold, so objects fall to the ground. Objects are attracted to objects of higher temperature; hence the pull of the sun, and most human interactions.

Man, that hurt my brain to write.
User avatar
Qwertyuiopasd
Admirable Admiral Qwerty
 
Posts: 14353
Joined: Wed Sep 14, 2005 5:38 pm
Location: Northern Virginia

Re: Proper salutation?

Postby Roy Hunter on Wed Mar 31, 2010 5:03 am

Ham Nox wrote:Hmmm.. I kind of wanted mine to be a bit more genuine than that and actually mean something. Just because it's a Diploma Mill doesn't mean there shouldn't be just the tiniest bit of real work involved, wouldn't ya say? We can't all be the pirates who don't do anything.
You can put as much work into it as you like. I would be genuinely interested to read some proper Pastafarian theological theses, as well as the nonsense with recipes for cheese sandwiches, and betting form for the crocoduck races.
Qwertyuiopasd wrote:Man, that hurt my brain to write.
No-one said being stupid was easy. That's why Republicans earn so much money for it.
User avatar
Roy Hunter
If it's not Scottish, it's crap.
 
Posts: 15766
Joined: Sun Nov 09, 2008 6:13 pm
Location: It's the place where you are, but that's not important right now.

Re: Proper salutation?

Postby black bart on Wed Mar 31, 2010 5:44 am

Roy Hunter wrote:
bacon wrote:"It was a dark and stormy night . . . " must also be included.
Careful, you'll get Black Bart started writing again...

Speaking of which, can we get this list of 'learning outcomes' finalised, so I can get writing my thesis? So far we have:

1. Starts with "Hello, my name is".
2. Continues with "In this essay I am going to write about".
3. Contains at least one "It was a dark and stormy night".

And I'd like to add:

4. Completely misinterprets any or all of the following:
a. Darwin's theory of natural selection.
b. The principle of scientific parsimony.
c. Abiogenesis.


I was in the pub with the Black Spot (erstwhile Pirate of these boards) and he said he is intending to write a series of essays refuting just about everything the scientific world is proposing at the moment. I'll keep an eye on his progress, could be useful. If you read some of his 'Far Fetched Anecdotes' there are one or two with a deep scientific basis.

Now then where was I...Oh yes:

It was a Stormy and dark night...no

It was a Stormy Monday Night...no...

The Dark Knight stormed into King Arthur's Court...D'oh!
User avatar
black bart
Resident Weevil
 
Posts: 25876
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2005 6:56 am
Location: London

Re: Proper salutation?

Postby Roland Deschain on Wed Mar 31, 2010 6:52 am

Sounds interesting, Bart. Might I also suggest:-

The knight stormed Guinevere's battlements like a thief in the night.

OR

A friend of a friend told me...

OR EVEN

Hi. I'm [Insert Name Here]. You may remember me from such Pastafarian theological papers as [Insert Ridiculously Named Paper Here] or [Insert Another Ridiculously Named Paper Here].
:haha:
User avatar
Roland Deschain
Sorcerer of Sauce
 
Posts: 3586
Joined: Thu Feb 11, 2010 2:13 pm
Location: BASE jumping off the Dark Tower.

Re: Proper salutation?

Postby bacon on Wed Mar 31, 2010 10:37 am

Roy Hunter wrote:Speaking of which, can we get this list of 'learning outcomes' finalised, so I can get writing my thesis? So far we have:

1. Starts with "Hello, my name is".
2. Continues with "In this essay I am going to write about".
3. Contains at least one "It was a dark and stormy night".

And I'd like to add:

4. Completely misinterprets any or all of the following:
a. Darwin's theory of natural selection.
b. The principle of scientific parsimony.
c. Abiogenesis.


It occurred to me last night that we need to have rules regarding the ending of our essays. I suggest that all essays must have any or all of the following:

a. In conclusion . . .
b. I would like to end this essay by . . .
c. This is my essay and I would like to thank . . .
d. The End

Absolutely no essay can end with "The Beginning."
User avatar
bacon
Everything's Better With Bacon
 
Posts: 5509
Joined: Fri Apr 17, 2009 12:42 pm
Location: in the frying pan

Re: Proper salutation?

Postby daftbeaker on Wed Mar 31, 2010 10:40 am

I'm just going to use Kent Hovind's 'thesis' as a template. It's far stupider than anything sane people can dream up :haha:
User avatar
daftbeaker
Help! I've fallen and can't get curry.
 
Posts: 11324
Joined: Mon Feb 02, 2009 2:11 pm
Location: Surrey, England.

Re: Proper salutation?

Postby Edd on Wed Mar 31, 2010 11:39 am

Ham Nox wrote:
Roy Hunter wrote:Should we start a diploma mill, and start churning out Doctors of Pastafarian Theology? Ham will buy *ahem* I mean "study" for one for sure. Me too (if it's not too expensive). When anyone starts complaining about the diploma mill, we can point to our flimsy moral standards, and claim that it is completely justified.


Hmmm.. I kind of wanted mine to be a bit more genuine than that and actually mean something. Just because it's a Diploma Mill doesn't mean there shouldn't be just the tiniest bit of real work involved, wouldn't ya say? We can't all be the pirates who don't do anything.

Realistically, pirates can't be forced to do anything. The ninja sects could, the groups really stressing the intellectual side of piracy could maybe, but not Pastafarians as a whole. But rather than just let 'em do whatever they please and get a degree, I would suggest that the requirement be that a Pastarian forgo boring or minimalist constraints and make their own study requirements--taking charge of their own education and steer it in the direction that they want in order to make a unique and interesting contribution. Maybe it doesn't have to be a 900 page essay... But there does have to be a thoughtful contribution of some sort. Something that is worth working to do one's best at. This will effectively test their ability to take command, to know and fight for the things they want, to be self-motivated and set their own rules. Things every good Pirate should know.

I want to see some motivated people, who can set their own course to enlightenment. That's what ought to set the Doctors apart from the average Joe (Plumber). Ideally, every Pastafarian should do this anyways, but...

It's still a diploma mill. If someone wants to spend all of 5 minutes making a Macaroni picture I guess no one can stop them.

*Sigh*

4d. Theory of gravity


The Diploma Mill can dispense different types of Diplomas. The Doctorate of Pastafarian Theology can be a serious (for any given value of serious) one and we can have all kinds of other silly (for any given value of silly) ones.
User avatar
Edd
Mystic of Meatball
 
Posts: 2505
Joined: Mon Jun 09, 2008 11:02 pm
Location: Texas

Re: Proper salutation?

Postby Roland Deschain on Wed Mar 31, 2010 12:52 pm

Ok, so i've been playing and have come up with a basic diploma design. I will continue to work on different designs, but will need ideas as to what the doctorate is in, for example. Here is the one I have so far:-

Image
User avatar
Roland Deschain
Sorcerer of Sauce
 
Posts: 3586
Joined: Thu Feb 11, 2010 2:13 pm
Location: BASE jumping off the Dark Tower.

Re: Proper salutation?

Postby Qwertyuiopasd on Wed Mar 31, 2010 12:57 pm

I'd love to see if we could get Bobby to actually sign these. :grin:
User avatar
Qwertyuiopasd
Admirable Admiral Qwerty
 
Posts: 14353
Joined: Wed Sep 14, 2005 5:38 pm
Location: Northern Virginia

Re: Proper salutation?

Postby m610 on Wed Mar 31, 2010 2:02 pm

OK then, let's make it meaningful. You have to write something decent, or not, but either way it must conform to the submission guidelines (many have been suggested here), it has to be accepted by some committee, maybe folks here chosen at random, just to check spelling and do a little QC and reject pure crap, and then it get added to "The Library of the Pastaria", as a PDF file, of course. Then and only then do you get your diploma (after paying the cost of printing and shipping) and you get to use the BoP or other salutation.

The only reason I mention $$ is that to do a nice job with this someone will have to spend some time and buy some nice paper and stamps (unless you'd accept the jpeg version). Besides, maybe it can help pay for this site.

And, Pastafarian University = P.U. ????
m610
Cannelloni Cannoneer
 
Posts: 118
Joined: Wed Apr 25, 2007 2:03 pm
Location: Davis, CA

Re: Proper salutation?

Postby Ham Nox on Wed Mar 31, 2010 6:50 pm

I'd prefer Flyingspaghettimonster University... Even if PU is a little more accurate in describe the authenticate odour du Pyrate.

Edit: Perhaps we can add some of that nice Noodle border Tig made to the edges? Either that or a burnt/water-damaged edge. It's just not a nice certificate unless it has a really cool border.
User avatar
Ham Nox
Mystic of Meatball
 
Posts: 2600
Joined: Thu Nov 12, 2009 9:44 pm
Location: Utah

Re: Proper salutation?

Postby m610 on Wed Mar 31, 2010 8:59 pm

UFSM
m610
Cannelloni Cannoneer
 
Posts: 118
Joined: Wed Apr 25, 2007 2:03 pm
Location: Davis, CA

Re: Proper salutation?

Postby Roland Deschain on Wed Mar 31, 2010 9:54 pm

Ham Nox wrote:I'd prefer Flyingspaghettimonster University... Even if PU is a little more accurate in describe the authenticate odour du Pyrate.

Edit: Perhaps we can add some of that nice Noodle border Tig made to the edges? Either that or a burnt/water-damaged edge. It's just not a nice certificate unless it has a really cool border.

Your wish is my command, oh Sister of the Sauce:-

Image

On a more serious note, if this really does go ahead, I have to say now that I do not know who owns the copyright to the pirate fish and FSM images i'm using, so this would need to be sought out.
User avatar
Roland Deschain
Sorcerer of Sauce
 
Posts: 3586
Joined: Thu Feb 11, 2010 2:13 pm
Location: BASE jumping off the Dark Tower.

Re: Proper salutation?

Postby Edd on Wed Mar 31, 2010 11:31 pm

Roland Deschain wrote:On a more serious note, if this really does go ahead, I have to say now that I do not know who owns the copyright to the pirate fish and FSM images i'm using, so this would need to be sought out.


Bobby encourages everyone to use them and he's also have to give the go-ahead for the site, so, as long as no one claims that the design is completely original or attempts to make a profit without some sort of explicit understanding with Bobby, I think we're copacetic.
User avatar
Edd
Mystic of Meatball
 
Posts: 2505
Joined: Mon Jun 09, 2008 11:02 pm
Location: Texas

Re: Proper salutation?

Postby Ham Nox on Thu Apr 01, 2010 12:50 pm

Roland Deschain wrote:
Ham Nox wrote:I'd prefer Flyingspaghettimonster University... Even if PU is a little more accurate in describe the authenticate odour du Pyrate.

Edit: Perhaps we can add some of that nice Noodle border Tig made to the edges? Either that or a burnt/water-damaged edge. It's just not a nice certificate unless it has a really cool border.

Your wish is my command, oh Sister of the Sauce:-

Image


D***it Roland! You just HAD to go and make me blow Diet Dr. Pepper out my nose!!! (IT BURNSES, IT BURNSES!!!)

This is just too funny.. It will have to be quarantined for the protection of soda-free nostrils everywhere.

Or maybe I'll just go ahead and post it to my facebook
:haha:
User avatar
Ham Nox
Mystic of Meatball
 
Posts: 2600
Joined: Thu Nov 12, 2009 9:44 pm
Location: Utah

PreviousNext

Return to All Things FSM

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 3 guests