I Need Shipmates

Arrr, I be a pirate!

Moderator: All Things Mods

I Need Shipmates

Postby McNealy on Tue Jun 02, 2009 1:41 am

http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=1 ... 576&ref=nf

Pasted from my group info:
I'm a 16-year-old guy who, like many, has always dreamt of being a swashbuckling captain on the ocean. But, you know, today's world doesn't really call for it much. And those Somalian pirates don't count. They don't look like pirates, and they don't even have swords!
So, I have an idea. I want to buy an island off the coast of Florida and build a resort/town there (hotel, mall, school, etc.) but make it pirate-themed. And I'll have a real, authentic pirate ship (of which I am the captain) that I can sail around the island every day, looking for treasure and adventure, protecting the island patrons as well!
I also want a snowy mountain attached to the island, where people can snowboard. I also want to put a ramp on the cliff that the pirates can jump off of to land on the ship. That would be awesome!
And there will always be a big bonfire on the island for roasting marshmallows and doing nude dances. Also, there'll be lots of epic swordfights going on every day. And we'll have monthly tryouts for the pirate crew, and weekly "treasure hunts" where we hide our treasure somewhere on the island and invite the civilians to search for it in the night while we try to hunt them down and "tag" them out of the game. I think that'll be fun!
It'd also be cool if, on the water, there was a giant statue of a pirate holding a sword in the air, like a parody of the Statue of Liberty, that new arrivals see as they fly into the airport.
Truly a great place to grow up, and live on!

Obviously, this'll cost a lot of money, but maybe I can get Disney to finance it if there's enough interest, and maybe we could tie it in with Pirates of the Caribbean somehow. Maybe there could be a movie about our island! :D



But! I need a crew. So, you can apply here if you want. You can also join this group if you'd be interested in this resort (because we need your support if we're gonna gain Disney's favor!). For those interested in being a pirate on my ship, here're the guidelines you must abide by:


1. We don't actually kill people. That would be illegal & wrong. But we DO take over their boats if they come too close! Then we offer them a choice: join the crew or get a free ride back to shore and I'll replace all the damages. But if they don't surrender at first, we make them listen to Hannah Montana music for three hours! bahahahaha

2. You must be determined to be the best you can be!

3. You must obtain a tan, a sword (not a REAL one, but a replica might work), a pirate-like shirt (think of an unbottoned henley), a snowboard, and a towel.

4. Must be able to listen to good music all day (John Mayer, Jason Mraz, Coldplay, etc.), as I will be playing it at loud volume on the ship. The classic "Black Pearl" song will be played in battle, though, of course!

5. I will subject you to two months training beforehand. This training will include learning to drive a ship, fight, spot land, bury treasure, fight ninjas, fight zombies, fight cowboys, fight robots, and fight vampires, due to their rising popularity in a post-twilight world. Just in case.

6. Must have a sense of humour and be able to have fun!


So, that's it, that's all! If you're interested, join the group. And, potential pirates, if you're worried about your physical condition currently, we're doing this in the year 2019. That's 10 years to get back in top shape! So I expect to have some very lean, mean buckaneers on my ship! Thanks, you guys, and I'll keep this group updated with whatever news pops up. Yarr!




Bring back pirates, my friends! this is quite possible if we can all unite together. Thank you! :violin:
User avatar
McNealy
Conchigliette Convert
 
Posts: 1
Joined: Tue Jun 02, 2009 1:22 am
Location: A Beach

Re: I Need Shipmates

Postby black bart on Tue Jun 02, 2009 2:53 am

McNealy wrote:http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=185774290576&ref=nf



5. I will subject you to two months training beforehand. This training will include learning to drive a ship, fight, spot land, bury treasure, fight ninjas, fight zombies, fight cowboys, fight robots, and fight vampires, due to their rising popularity in a post-twilight world. Just in case.

:


Arrr...does this trainin hinclude how ta deal wiv Big Brenda in a Force Ten Gale, How ta change Nef Yoo's Nappy, how ta dodge payin yer tab in thee Benbow and how tell a Dugong from one o thee wenches in thee harbour?

Also ye needs ta look more loik a Pirate ta be really convincin matey...ye looks loik a street urchin ta me.
The smoke wafted gently in the breeze across the poop deck and all seemed right in the world.
User avatar
black bart
Resident Weevil
 
Posts: 25876
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2005 6:56 am
Location: London

Re: I Need Shipmates

Postby Detective TurtleHolmes on Tue Jun 02, 2009 3:25 am

He ain't even taken 'is first boit o' weevils oar Fish Head Stew, oi'll wager.

But ye keep as ye arr, me lad. We'll turn ye.
A flap of the wings yesterday means big changes tomorrow.
Let's work together to keep the present inevitable.

So yeah, I went and got a blog.
User avatar
Detective TurtleHolmes
Clouseau's Protege
 
Posts: 9266
Joined: Fri Oct 12, 2007 6:34 am
Location: Francemouth

Re: I Need Shipmates

Postby black bart on Tue Jun 02, 2009 4:05 am

Detective TurtleHolmes wrote:He ain't even taken 'is first boit o' weevils oar Fish Head Stew, oi'll wager.

But ye keep as ye arr, me lad. We'll turn ye.


Lets just put it this way matey...if he puts up an advert up in Portsmouth Harbour what reads:

I NEED SHIPMATES :wink:

FSM help him!
The smoke wafted gently in the breeze across the poop deck and all seemed right in the world.
User avatar
black bart
Resident Weevil
 
Posts: 25876
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2005 6:56 am
Location: London

Re: I Need Shipmates

Postby Ubi Dubius on Tue Jun 02, 2009 4:20 am

McNealy wrote:http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=185774290576&ref=nf

1. We don't actually kill people. That would be illegal & wrong. But we DO take over their boats if they come too close! Then we offer them a choice: join the crew or get a free ride back to shore and I'll replace all the damages. But if they don't surrender at first, we make them listen to Hannah Montana music for three hours! bahahahaha


Ye bee a crewel, crewel man.
Davros, Attorney and Pieces of Law
Keeping up appearances is a very important activity in religion; in fact, maintaining tattered illusions is its main activity. - Richard Wade, on Friendlyatheist.com
We make an idol of our fear and call it God. -Ingmar Bergman, The Seventh Seal
User avatar
Ubi Dubius
Set bail, me hearties!
 
Posts: 5253
Joined: Tue Sep 02, 2008 4:50 pm
Location: Varrrrrrgggggghhhhhhinia

Re: I Need Shipmates

Postby Detective TurtleHolmes on Tue Jun 02, 2009 5:58 am

black bart wrote:
Detective TurtleHolmes wrote:He ain't even taken 'is first boit o' weevils oar Fish Head Stew, oi'll wager.

But ye keep as ye arr, me lad. We'll turn ye.


Lets just put it this way matey...if he puts up an advert up in Portsmouth Harbour what reads:

I NEED SHIPMATES :wink:

FSM help him!
Ye rememmer Speckled Pete? Oi heer he died the uvver day. Poor bloke, died inna crush o' tranz-vestibles. Oi hear he put up wunnuv those soigns.
A flap of the wings yesterday means big changes tomorrow.
Let's work together to keep the present inevitable.

So yeah, I went and got a blog.
User avatar
Detective TurtleHolmes
Clouseau's Protege
 
Posts: 9266
Joined: Fri Oct 12, 2007 6:34 am
Location: Francemouth

Re: I Need Shipmates

Postby bacon on Tue Jun 02, 2009 8:35 am

aye lad, it be a foine dream but iffin' ye wont to make it come true ye pay attenshun to thee poirats here 'en they be willin' ta show ye how to act like a foine poirat

and ye need an eyepatch
Get your bake on. Image

TwistedSister wrote:You can't go wrong with a side of Bacon on your side.........
User avatar
bacon
Everything's Better With Bacon
 
Posts: 5509
Joined: Fri Apr 17, 2009 12:42 pm
Location: in the frying pan

Re: I Need Shipmates

Postby ET, the Extra Terrestrial on Tue Jun 02, 2009 9:20 am

McNealy wrote:I also want a snowy mountain attached to the island, where people can snowboard.

Arr, matey, ye mowt foind as wut thats a bit o unloikely. It be warm in Floraddy, but snow be needin coaled fer t not be ameltin.
"Mit der Dummheit kämpfen Götter selbst vergebens."
("Against stupidity, the gods themselves contend in vain.")
-- Friedrich Schiller (1759–1805)
Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away.
-- Philip K Dick

OK, now let's look at four dimensions on the blackboard.
-- Dr. Joy

English isn't much of a language for swearing. When I studied Ancient Greek I was delighted to discover a single word - Rhaphanidosthai - which translates roughly as "Be thou thrust up the fundament with a radish for adultery."
User avatar
ET, the Extra Terrestrial
Privvy Counselor
 
Posts: 6873
Joined: Thu Jan 24, 2008 5:01 am
Location: In the woods, watching

Re: I Need Shipmates

Postby bacon on Tue Jun 02, 2009 9:27 am

well there be a place near to me that be buildin' an indoor ski slope - he could loik into that
Get your bake on. Image

TwistedSister wrote:You can't go wrong with a side of Bacon on your side.........
User avatar
bacon
Everything's Better With Bacon
 
Posts: 5509
Joined: Fri Apr 17, 2009 12:42 pm
Location: in the frying pan

Re: I Need Shipmates

Postby black bart on Wed Jun 03, 2009 6:41 am

bacon wrote:well there be a place near to me that be buildin' an indoor ski slope - he could loik into that


Me ship's plank be fairly slipperee loik...he could slide orf that easy enuff.
The smoke wafted gently in the breeze across the poop deck and all seemed right in the world.
User avatar
black bart
Resident Weevil
 
Posts: 25876
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2005 6:56 am
Location: London


Return to Pirate Discussion

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 3 guests