I think I may start mining Mystery Men for quotes. This could get long.
Sphinx: We are number one. All others are number two or lower.
Mr. Furious: I don't need a compass to know which way the wind shines.
The Sphinx: To learn my teachings, I must first teach you how to learn.
The Sphinx: You must lash out with every limb, like the octopus who plays the drums.
The Sphinx: He who questions training only trains himself at asking questions.
[Mr. Furious tries to balance a hammer on his head]
Mr. Furious: Why am I doing this, again?
The Sphinx: When you can balance a tack hammer on your head, you will head off your foes with a balanced attack.
Mr. Furious: And why am I wearing the watermelon on my feet?
The Sphinx: [looks at the watermelon on Mr. Furious' feet] I don't remember telling you to do that.
[the trio talks about recruiting more heroes for the team]
The Blue Raja: Well, there's The Sphinx, of course.
Mr. Furious: The what?
The Blue Raja: The Sphinx.
The Shoveller: I know this guy. Big crime-fighter from down South. Big-league hitter down there.
Mr. Furious: What's his power?
The Blue Raja: Well, he's terribly mysterious.
Mr. Furious: [dismissively] That's it? That's his power? He's mysterious?
The Blue Raja: Well, TERRIBLY mysterious.
The Shoveller: Plus he can, like, cut guns in half with his mind
The Shoveller: We struck down evil with the mighty sword of teamwork and the hammer of not bickering.
The Shoveller: Come on, somebody do something, we need him.
The Bowler: Okay. Okay, you're a very furious man, you understand that?
Mr. Furious: No.
The Bowler: No? Well you've got a lot to be furious about, and I'll tell you why: You're not well-liked. You're uh, you're abrasive and off- putting. You try and say pithy things, but your wit is a hinderance and therefore nothing is provocative. Just mixed metaphors. Now, doesn't that make you angry? Does it infuriate you?
Mr. Furious: No.
The Bowler: Well, it should. Aren't you angry? Come on, man!
The Shoveller: Your penmanship is atrocious!
The Sphinx: You dress in the manner of a male prostitute!
Lucille: If just one person vomits in my pool, I'm divorcing you.
The Shoveller: That's fair
The Shoveller: If we had a billionaire like Lance Hunt as our benefactor...
Mr. Furious: That's because Lance Hunt *IS* Captain Amazing
The Shoveller: Don't start that *again*. Lance Hunt wears glasses. Captain Amazing *doesn't* wear glasses.
Mr. Furious: He takes them off when he transforms.
The Shoveller: That doesn't make any sense, he wouldn't be able to see
Waffler: I... am the Waffler. With my griddle of justice, I BASH the enemy in the head, or I burn them like so! I also have some truth syrup, which is low in fat. (The fact that this guy was played by Dane Cook makes it even funnier.)
The Shoveller: All right, I'll take point, you two flank. Let's triangulate.
The Spleen: Equilateral or isosceles?
The Shoveller: We've got a blind date with destiny... and it looks like she's ordered the lobster.
I love that movie.
If only Wash were a magical zombie like Jesus. I miss him. Now who will pilot my spaceship?
"Life IS pain, Highness. Anyone who says differently is selling something."
Alex Trebek: Oh good. Mr. Connery wants to say something.
Sean Connery: I've thought of some more foreign ladies I snogged.