TPBM (The Pirate Below Me)

[Elastoman]

Well, whot be ferther from reel life then a bit o fan tassy loike that, eh? An they's well wrote.

TPBM fails ta' wash b'fore meetin' ther blin' date.

[Rev. Rowan Redbeard]

Are ye daft, man? It's her eyes that don't work...not her nose!

TPBM finds that Fish Head Stew is remarkable for clearing up athlete's foot.

[Elastoman]

Better'n a quart o' pish on yer toesies, ain't it?

TPBM 'as a mortal fear o' flyin' fish.

[black bart]

Aaarrrrgh...the little beggers gets stuck in yer peg leg. I has ta send me best water nymph after em:



TPBM is a water nymph

[Mad Willyum Bonney]

Not so , oi tryit anywarrs .

TPBM has spots on 'is ceilin' abuv 'is bunk ..

[Elastoman]

True 'nuff, mate. I dinn't know rum could go bad, but aparently this stuff did. Were a helluva mess.

TPBM's been bathin' more often lately.

[fueledbycoffee]

Tis true, I been a bit more motivated ta not smell vaguely like a bilge, lately.

TPBM sleeps in the bilge.

[black bart]

Aaarrrgh...I fell in arter a couple o Captain's Delights

TPBM does a great impression of Charles Lawton

[Rev. Rowan Redbeard]

An' I don't even know who he is.

TPBM scuttles the ships a'fore they loot 'em, just ta save time.

[ChowMein]

Yarr , 'strewth ,
Oi needs me proparr allokayshun ove beauty sleep oil 'ave ye nose !

TPBM is a prowde parrint ove NYBB !

[Dan (dat haole dude)]

Awkk! Awwk! nottrooattealle Awkk! Awwk!..

[erm, oi foughte ye sedde parrit, bruddah CM--soe, neffer mynde, ya?]

TPBM 'as lette 'is (or 'er) "Pyllygynge Lye-senzzz" hexpyre 'n' naow wurrkes fer Portsmouth-Dizz-knee as a pyratickal hextra in fillums.

[Detective TurtleHolmes]

An' dey paye bittir'n the pilligyin', oi tells ye! Ye jus' gotta put yer foot doon when dey arsk ye ta get et by crockoshites, oi mean crockodyles.

[Dan (dat haole dude)]

An' aftarrgh 2, yez runnes oota feets t'putte doon, ya daft buggah! allus ooze summon l-sez feets wen yer neere-abaht crocs..dat weigh, wen dere feets gette chomp'ed, ye kin stylle roon awee (er, inne yer case, DeTH, toorne intae a batte an' flye..)

TPBM wunce treated Big Brenda t' "alle ye kin eate nyghte" atte da Tumescent Udder* & liv'ed t'telle abaht itte..

*jes' a tweetche anna weegle doon da lane frae da Addy B (onne da weigh t' Madame Fifi's......er zo oi'm toll'ed )

[black bart]

Arrrgh...I can't remember how ta do this thread...I blames Nef Yoo BB fer lowerin standards!

[Dan (dat haole dude)]

TPAM also blames that shining-visaged childe fer 'is unfortunate 'air colouring an' jinny-rull haire uv unne-repennant klownne-neff..

TPBM has D-sigh-unnz onne Pirgella's leetle seestah, Hilda-the-Goony..