Santa is comin' - man your anti aircraft guns!

[black bart]

Ye be ALL mad...ye've finally Schnapped! (Oh no not the puns again!)

[Dan (dat haole dude)]

wull, if'n wee bee MAD, eet bee an act o' WILL, an' a BONNEY wun at dat!!

[pieces o'nine]

^


~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Mad Willyum Shake Speare sais: send Young Bart an 'is ajin rat to England. 'E shall recuvver 'is wits there; oar, iffen 'e do not, hit's no grate matter theyre. 'Twill a not be scene in 'im theyre; theyre thee men be as mad as he. O wayte! 'E be *awl reddy* in England! Send 'im to Spain, then.

[DaveL]

Yarrrr...

What your preference for the 24th of December lads?

Bristol Bloodhound


OR

The Enforcer

[Detective TurtleHolmes]

Argh, tharr be nuffin' better'n a good Enforcer ta git the job done iffen the Bloodhound misses it's course.

As long as ye use rocks wit' explosins in.

[Dan (dat haole dude)]

Oi finks mee anna croo will stick wit' Da Enforcer..only 'bristols' wee bee famyllyar wit' are summat rounder an' softer den da one(s) ya gottes in da pikshurr (an' usuallee bee hattach'ed in pairs t' da fronts of grrlz, notte stuck all bydem selfes onna launch pad inna car park)

[DaveL]

LOG REPORT

Date: 24/12/1708
Time: 2200 hours
Location: Roofttop, Admiral Benbow, Santaquest 1708 HQ

NOTES: Sky's all clear...Large weaponry array set up...Enuff ammo to wipe Santa and his elves out 100x over
...If the Easter Bunny resurfaces, he's gone as well!...Lots of drinking and festivity in the Benbow below...
Horizon check...From my spyglass I can see Madame Fifi's...is that Francine the Flagellator waving at me?...Back to the job at hand...
Rowdy scenes down at the dock...someone keeps yelling 'get down here and have a Xmas drink ye blaggard!'...ignored requests...must stick to mission...

This year...Santa is toast...

[DaveL]

LOG REPORT

Date: 24/12/1708
Time: 2230 hours
Location: Roofttop, Admiral Benbow, Santaquest 1708 HQ

NOTES: Spyglass keep fogging up, looking at 3 girls on Fifi's balcony...Oh no, now they are dancing for me...must stick to duty, must stick to duty...
Reports coming in from North Pole...Santa's been delayed...That does it, give me a drink, no make it 3...What's that Oi hear, Francine is calling me from Madame Fifi's balcony in a thick French accent...'Oh Capteen DaveL, eets time fer serm Chreetsmas cheer'...That does it, Oi'm orf to Fifi's...back shortly...

Don't go away Santa...there's a storm comin'...there's a storm comin...

[Dan (dat haole dude)]

AUE! wee gotte Santa inna cross-hares* uv Da Enforcer (loaded uppe wit' niu ho'opahu/eggy-sploseeve coconuts) and wot to arrre wonderin' eyes shoulde appeare? well, seemes loike PETARDE** wuz inna 'hood an' stopp'ed bye t' make sure wee no cause rooy-nashun/distress t' annafink wot's flyin' abaht..toime wee blew 'em orf wit' platty-toods and some day-olde "vegan haupia", dat rotten chunky elf an' 'is flea-bitten minions 'adde fledde da scene, leavin' reindeer poop on our lanai...

*yup, wee gots angry bunnies t' help aim D.E., cuz uv theer greate nyghte-vizzunn..

**Pipple fo' da Effical Treatement uv Airborne Reindeers an' Dumpy Elves

[Nef Yoo BlackBeard]

santa claws ?

wotsa santa ?

[DaveL]

YArrr...

That be a fine question matey. The answer is, hopefully, "shot down in a fiery blaze" of course.

[anthrobabe]

YArrr...

That be a fine question matey. The answer is, hopefully, "shot down in a fiery blaze" of course.

Ha! You wish ye cold harted gouger. Santa is kurently safe in hidin at me place!
(so ok the truf be i holdin 'im for ransom- but it ain't goin well- seems tha elves ain't paid wif cash and I be not about to take toyz fur da ransoms).

btw - where the heck ye been hidin yerself?

o rite that'd be me

[DaveL]

YArrrr!

It be Saucy Gert, nice to see yer!

Oi should be askin you the same question, ye big blaggard-ette!
Hand that fat bugger over immediately. Oi got a bit distracted over at Fifi's and (yet again) failed to polish him off.

[anthrobabe]

ARGH they be plenty o polishin over at Fifis anyway ye kant 'ave 'im.

[Angry_Santa]

I can't be held responsible for the argyle socks grammy gives you, also you actually need to have a chimney, a floating mast that is not.