I can top that....

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Re: I can top that....

Postby black bart on Wed Dec 10, 2008 6:40 am

I satisfied* 10 women and four sheep in under 50 years.

*the word satisfied is used here in it's broader sense and no discussion was ever undertaken with any of the sheep involved.
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Re: I can top that....

Postby Roy Hunter on Thu Dec 11, 2008 3:06 pm

I satisfied a woman with a sheep.

(I made her a lamb madras.)
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Re: I can top that....

Postby black bart on Fri Dec 12, 2008 7:03 am

Roy Hunter wrote:I satisfied a woman with a sheep.

(I made her a lamb madras.)


Damn I wish I'd thought of that...it would have saved me a fortune!
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Re: I can top that....

Postby Rev. Rowan Redbeard on Sat Dec 13, 2008 10:25 pm

I weigh 175 pounds (and have for the past 17 years) and can consume a 21" pizza and a pitcher of root beer in one sitting.
—Captain the Reverend Lord C.S. Rowan, Lord of Glencoe, Minister of Pastafarianism, Gentleman Pirate

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Re: I can top that....

Postby Edd on Sun Dec 14, 2008 8:21 am

I also weigh approx. 175 lbs (I’ve actually gone up from the 165-170 range in the last five years) can eat an entire 21” pizza, a pitcher of root beer (though I prefer Dr. Pepper), a couple of hot wings, a salad, and still get dirty looks from my family when I suggest stopping for ice cream on the way home.
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Re: I can top that....

Postby black bart on Tue Dec 16, 2008 6:43 am

Aaarrgh...if I unscrew me hook, me peg leg and me eye patch, I be the same weight as a Brass Monkey full o canon balls and I can eat 3 buckets o Fish Head Stew, a bag o ship's biscuits and still ave room fer a couple o melons.
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Re: I can top that....

Postby Roy Hunter on Tue Dec 16, 2008 1:18 pm

I weigh so much that if I have two full bowls of pasta and climb back into the dalek costume, I need a goods vehicle license to drive home again.
"I don't mean to sound bitter, cynical or cruel; but I am, so that's how it comes out." ~ Bill Hicks.
"To argue with a person who has renounced reason is like administering medicine to the dead." ~ Thomas Paine.
"One should not believe everything one reads on the internet." ~ Abraham Lincoln.
"If you're making a political point wearing a balaclava, you're a c***. It was true for the IRA and it's true now." ~ daftbeaker.
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Re: I can top that....

Postby Pirate Johnson on Mon Jan 05, 2009 4:04 am

I'm so Phat, it's Phresh. I'm sleepy if this makes no cents.
In brightest day
In darkest night
No ninjas shall escape my sight
Let those who warrrship evil Unicorn's might
beware my power
Green Cannon's fire


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Re: I can top that....

Postby black bart on Mon Jan 12, 2009 9:05 am

Well PHAT is supposed to have the backronym: Pretty Hot and Tasty...yep, that sums me up (if I've just been microwaved).
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Re: I can top that....

Postby Pirate Johnson on Mon Jan 12, 2009 12:00 pm

I can smoke myself sober.
In brightest day
In darkest night
No ninjas shall escape my sight
Let those who warrrship evil Unicorn's might
beware my power
Green Cannon's fire


About the colors I post in see: http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/rgb

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gCMzjJjuxQI&playnext=10&playnext_from=QL

YES. I AM PirateJohnson on Ebay.

R.I.P.George Carlin (my hero)
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Re: I can top that....

Postby Pirate Johnson on Mon Jan 12, 2009 2:43 pm

http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/video/jizz

I dedicate this all my pirate brothers who claim they can satasfy women.
In brightest day
In darkest night
No ninjas shall escape my sight
Let those who warrrship evil Unicorn's might
beware my power
Green Cannon's fire


About the colors I post in see: http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/rgb

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gCMzjJjuxQI&playnext=10&playnext_from=QL

YES. I AM PirateJohnson on Ebay.

R.I.P.George Carlin (my hero)
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Re: I can top that....

Postby Sentinel on Sat Jan 24, 2009 5:01 pm

I can beat Chuck Norris. 8)
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Re: I can top that....

Postby S'presso on Sat Jan 24, 2009 5:40 pm

I won the game, and then beat chuck norris
Look! A new sig.
Blaaaaag.
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Re: I can top that....

Postby Wawizzle on Sat Jan 24, 2009 8:16 pm

I made Chuck Norris lose The Game.
“We are often hesitant to look at other faiths or to examine our own critically because we feel that, in doing so, we are being disloyal to our own deeply felt convictions. ... And yet our beliefs are not worth very much if they cannot stand up to any scrutiny.” -- James Livingston.
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Re: I can top that....

Postby ET, the Extra Terrestrial on Sat Jan 24, 2009 11:51 pm

I made Chuck Norris lose his lunch.
"Mit der Dummheit kämpfen Götter selbst vergebens."
("Against stupidity, the gods themselves contend in vain.")
-- Friedrich Schiller (1759–1805)
Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away.
-- Philip K Dick

OK, now let's look at four dimensions on the blackboard.
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English isn't much of a language for swearing. When I studied Ancient Greek I was delighted to discover a single word - Rhaphanidosthai - which translates roughly as "Be thou thrust up the fundament with a radish for adultery."
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