How to prevent Christians from stoning you.

[Scott the Pirate]

The point is that the estimate in the bible if awful even when compared to those of other early civilizations. 31 cubits by 10 would have been a closer estimate. The Greeks, Chinese, Egyptians and Maya all had much better estimates. My main point was not to say specifically what pi equals (arent there supercomputers still doing those calculations?) but rather that a 4,000 year old book with so many mistakes and outright contradictions cannot be the final word of a perfect being. Nor should it be used as a basis for modern morality.

Scott

[Apostateabe]

The point is that the estimate in the bible if awful even when compared to those of other early civilizations. 31 cubits by 10 would have been a closer estimate. The Greeks, Chinese, Egyptians and Maya all had much better estimates. My main point was not to say specifically what pi equals (arent there supercomputers still doing those calculations?) but rather that a 4,000 year old book with so many mistakes and outright contradictions cannot be the final word of a perfect being. Nor should it be used as a basis for modern morality.

Scott

Then I have a passage appropriate for that end.

1 By the rivers of Babylon we sat and wept
when we remembered Zion.

2 There on the poplars
we hung our harps,

3 for there our captors asked us for songs,
our tormentors demanded songs of joy;
they said, "Sing us one of the songs of Zion!"

4 How can we sing the songs of the LORD
while in a foreign land?

5 If I forget you, O Jerusalem,
may my right hand forget its skill .

6 May my tongue cling to the roof of my mouth
if I do not remember you,
if I do not consider Jerusalem
my highest joy.

7 Remember, O LORD, what the Edomites did
on the day Jerusalem fell.
"Tear it down," they cried,
"tear it down to its foundations!"

8 O Daughter of Babylon, doomed to destruction,
happy is he who repays you
for what you have done to us-

9 he who seizes your infants
and dashes them against the rocks.

It doesn't get much more goth than that.

[fueledbycoffee]

That was more emo than goth. Not a single mention of bats or giving oneself to the darkness. It was all "Oh, pity, oh sadness" until the end, which was more "I'm suiting up for my own personal school shooting".

[Apostateabe]

That was more emo than goth. Not a single mention of bats or giving oneself to the darkness. It was all "Oh, pity, oh sadness" until the end, which was more "I'm suiting up for my own personal school shooting".

OK, emo.

[Scott the Pirate]

Speaking of, i've wanted to figure out how to put an image in a post. I've got a rather large collection of images and many of them would be funny, fun or helpful when i make a point. I see the "Img" button, but how do i actually insert one from a file on my computer? I get the img prompt, but thats it. Am i missing something here?
Scott

[Apostateabe]

Speaking of, i've wanted to figure out how to put an image in a post. I've got a rather large collection of images and many of them would be funny, fun or helpful when i make a point. I see the "Img" button, but how do i actually insert one from a file on my computer? I get the img prompt, but thats it. Am i missing something here?
Scott

You can't upload a file from your own hard drive directly to a forum like this one. You must use an online image host. I suggest imageshack.us--that seems to be the friendliest one, but there are others. Or you can link to an image that is already on the web. That is not recommended if hotlinking is not allowed or it comes from a small site like geocities. You copy the URL of the image (you can get it by right-clicking on an online image and "copy image location" or go to properties), and you put it in the img tags of a forum post.

Code: Select all

[img]http://www.google.com/intl/en_ALL/images/logo.gif[/img]

[Scott the Pirate]

Thanks! I'll get to it eventually, but the image in question is rather cruel but funny in a dark way. It's called "emo kid dance party". It's an emo kid sitting on a chair at a high school dance bawling his eyes out while a crowd of kids takes his picture with their cell phone cameras. Evil.

Anyway, i was going to say that the best place to find fundies who cant back up their beliefs is on the city bus. On my way home from college one day i was writing a paper called "Noahs Flood: A Critique Using Inference to the Best Explanation" on my laptop when the woman next to me says "oh! are you writing about Noah? That's nice." I simply said "There was no flood. There's absolutely no evidence that such a thing ever happened." Next thing i knew i was defending my viewpoint against a half-dozen xtians! Really thought that i was going to get stoned right on the spot.

Scott

[Robbobrob]

That was more emo than goth. Not a single mention of bats or giving oneself to the darkness. It was all "Oh, pity, oh sadness" until the end, which was more "I'm suiting up for my own personal school shooting".

OK, emo.

Emo Jesus...can you imagine.... All black eye-lined out but in his flowy robe.....classic.

[SauceJacuzzi]

Any situation with the word, "stoned" and "christian" can be a fun time if you're with the cool christians.

How come i always have to buy the oregano?

Oregano from the FSM's sauce! w00t!

[Scott the Pirate]

In my experience, even the "cool" christians eventually turn out to be self-righteous jerks. I had a friend all through high school who was a christian and simply assumed that i was as well. The topic of MY religion or lack thereof simply never came up. He found out in college that i'm an atheist and spoke to me one last time. "Stay the f*ck away from me you f*cking liar. People like you should be shot." 4 years of friendship down the drain never to return. Although i found out about 10 years ago that he went to prison for nearly beating his wife to death. Maybe it was all for the best.

Scott

[Elvalia]

In my experience, even the "cool" christians eventually turn out to be self-righteous jerks. I had a friend all through high school who was a christian and simply assumed that i was as well. The topic of MY religion or lack thereof simply never came up. He found out in college that i'm an atheist and spoke to me one last time. "Stay the f*ck away from me you f*cking liar. People like you should be shot." 4 years of friendship down the drain never to return. Although i found out about 10 years ago that he went to prison for nearly beating his wife to death. Maybe it was all for the best.

Scott

Bad experience. I feel for you, but don't let that colour how you think of Christians in general.


I had a very nice one come to my door a few weeks ago. I let him go on for a bit, and he told me all about how my family would all be brought back to life by Jesus the Cosmic Jewish Zombie (I don't think he used those exact words), and how every family would have two acres of land to live on (I didn't point out to him that that's pathetic, my front lawn is two acres of land), and I humoured him with some questions to show I was listening (overpopulation? Food shortage? Food distribution problems?). When he tried to leave me some pamphlets, I had to tell him that I was Pastafarian, then I had to explain what that was (I didn't go into the details about ID in schools. I stuck with FSM creating planet, etc.). He was a very pleasant man and we had a delightful conversation that made no sense, but amused me for about ten minutes. I think he was just happy to have someone not brush him off immediately, the poor guy.

[Apostateabe]

In my experience, even the "cool" christians eventually turn out to be self-righteous jerks. I had a friend all through high school who was a christian and simply assumed that i was as well. The topic of MY religion or lack thereof simply never came up. He found out in college that i'm an atheist and spoke to me one last time. "Stay the f*ck away from me you f*cking liar. People like you should be shot." 4 years of friendship down the drain never to return. Although i found out about 10 years ago that he went to prison for nearly beating his wife to death. Maybe it was all for the best.

Scott

I have made a habit of judging Christians based on the Christianity of my own region. I forget that other parts of the country and the world are different. Christians here in the pacific northwest seem to be relatively unaggressive. Many more carrots than sticks.

[Scott the Pirate]

Here in Duluth, MN they tend to be pushy and rude. We recently had a thing called the "Lake Superior Dragonboat Festival" across the bridge in Superior, WI. My gf was paddling in it so i went for the beer and the food...oh yeah, and to support her. Standing at the gate was a guy with a bullhorn and a sign that read "You will burn. Reject satan and join christ or suffer the consequences." I figured that i'd just leave the kooky f*ucker alone until he turned on the megaphone and started shouting things like "Jesus sees you fornicators! (to a teenaged girl and her boyfriend) How many times have you let him use you, whore?" At which point a young (4 or 5) boy in front of us asked his mother what "fornicate" means. I asked the woman and her son to stay where they were and grabbed a nearby cop. we told him what was said. He listened until he heard the words "whore" and "slut" directed at another teen girl and then issued him a ticket for verbal harrassment and disturbing the peace. "God protect me from your followers" indeed.

Scott

[Marinara Minister]

Howdy folks...I'd like to ask a question. The first problem I seem to come up against when I'm talking to the really repugnant fundies is how the 'Cosmic Jewish Zombie's' death negated the OT, so even though there are a bunch of horrific punsihments for wearing cotton/polyester blends and tattooing the crucifix on one's arm is as blasphemous as lying with another man in the OT, they're no longer bound by it's rules. Whenever I come across a bunch of intelligent minded people (present company included), we all spend our time in DudeARodInMe and Leviticus (o.k., I really just don't know how to spell the first book, and thought that was mildly clever) because it is sensational, but the wind is out of our sails if we bring these arguments to bear.

I don't have the time to dedicate to reading the NT. Can someone point me toward a few examples of repulsive commands or anti-social dogma in the post-zombie bible?

[Putanesca]

I think I may have found us a loop hole here folks. Consider the following extract from above.

'Let us go and serve other gods, which thou hast not known, thou, nor thy fathers'

The use of the plural 'fathers' would suggest to me that what is implied is ancestors as we all have only one father.

Now, we can go back as far as we like in our family tree untill we find an ancestor who worshiped the god of our choice. Hey presto, no stoning.