I wish I were DNA helicase, so I could unzip your genes.
You must be Yersinia pestis, because you give me a fever and a swelling of the groin.
The adult body has 206 bones (approximately) in it. Want another?
I wish I were your derivative, so I could like tangent to your curves.
I wish I were your second derivative, so I could investigate your concavities.
Best part is, none of those were commentary on physical appearance. Nerds unite!
[...] the difficulty of believing that a perfect and complex eye could be formed by natural selection, though insuperable by our imagination, should not be considered as subversive of the theory.