...leaving only Captain Turtlehead sitting at his seat in the entire auditorium, because he had a keg of rum strapped to the underside of his table. He sniggers, noticing that no-one else was as bright as he.
Mayor Liversausage coughs to get Cap'n T's attention.
"Well, Captain Turtlehead, that brings us to the next award. It was for "Most Dashing Pirate In All The Land", but you can have it anyway. You're the only one left, so I guess..."
Cap'n T graciously swoops up to the stage, and receives the award to tumultuous silence.
"Thanks ye, everywun! Oi wish te thank me crew, me ship, and me cannon! Aargh!"
Satisfied, he returns to his seat and refills his glass, gazing admiringly at his Jim Lad.
Mayor Liversausage, growing impatient, presses a hidden button underneath the microphone. Bars slam down from the ceiling onto the bar, severing a few hooks, but most importantly, separating the pirates from their drinks. Disheartened, the all return to their seat.
Cap'n Turtlehead strokes his Jim Lad lovingly.
A flap of the wings yesterday means big changes tomorrow.
Let's work together to keep the present inevitable.
So yeah, I went and got a blog.