The Touching Creed

Submit your scriptural writings for inclusion in the Loose Canon, and your tales of ancient FSM Lore, as well as any other FSM-related writing you may have.

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Flying Jib
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The Touching Creed

Postby Flying Jib » Wed Feb 20, 2008 11:42 am

With his divine noodly appendage, the Flying Spaghetti Monster will touch all and only those beings who do not touch themselves.


Have you been touched? :fsm:
"...as the ship is directed by the pirate..."

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E.Raser two
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Re: The Touching Creed

Postby E.Raser two » Wed Feb 20, 2008 3:05 pm

Flying Jib wrote: and only those beings who do not touch themselves.



are you sexuofobic like that priest of Fabriano?
How many times , baby, do you touch yourself????

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Almighty Doer of Stuff
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Postby Almighty Doer of Stuff » Thu Feb 21, 2008 5:29 pm

Arrgh, there's a stripper factory in heaven but we can't touch ourselves? Methinks that be somethin' other than oregano in yer pasta sauce, matey!

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E.Raser two
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Postby E.Raser two » Fri Feb 22, 2008 7:05 am

Almighty Doer of Stuff wrote:Arrgh, there's a stripper factory in heaven but we can't touch ourselves? Methinks that be somethin' other than oregano in yer pasta sauce, matey!


I am not sure that we can touch ourselves in the heaven, that there are different senses there.
But.....there are stripper factories .....down to the Earth too

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black bart
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Crabs

Postby black bart » Tue Feb 26, 2008 11:01 am

Blessed are the touched...for they shall inherit the crabs.
The smoke wafted gently in the breeze across the poop deck and all seemed right in the world.

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E.Raser two
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Re: Crabs

Postby E.Raser two » Wed Feb 27, 2008 6:49 am

black bart wrote:Blessed are the touched...for they shall inherit the crabs.


well... but la Corte di Cassazione decided that touching himself it is a rib of 1.000 euro, because obscene

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Lord of Numa
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Re: The Touching Creed

Postby Lord of Numa » Wed Feb 27, 2008 4:22 pm

Flying Jib wrote:With his divine noodly appendage, the Flying Spaghetti Monster will touch all and only those beings who do not touch themselves.


Have you been touched? :fsm:
dammit! So this god hates porn too?!?!?!

WHY CANST I ESCAPEST THEE?!?!

Oh, wait, no, you are wrong. The great FSM is down with the self lovin' and sympathizes with the lonely. :wink:
May the glorious Flying Spaghetti Monster bathe you in his wondrous Mercy, Love, and Garlic Sauce!
May He bless MP3 Fiesta and their noodlicious music bargains!
May He also watch over Roffleopolis and touch it with his marvelous Noodly Appendages.

RAmen


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