Cutlasses vs Pistols

[Dan(da haole guy)]

ARR-oha..Cap'n DaveL..C'mas Eve, y'say?? w'ere oi comes frum, dat'ud be "makahiki"(whole month uv games/feastin'/boinkin'..who needs pudding??)..but me anna udda cannolis wud be proud 'n' 'appy t' take toime aht frum cARRousin' t' take a shot er 2 at da beeg bearded buggah..Bofors, ey? w'y not..we go make speshul "C4(p.o.i.)" fo' da occashun..load up da gun wit' rounds stuffed wit it & let fly...woo!

OZ_Nick, 'ey, brah..be werry werry suspicious uv da Shrub dude, ya? ya annoy 'im 'n' he's atcher friggin' gangplank wit' a buncha likely lads ('e calls 'em "advisors"..) wot will preach at yez in relays 'til ya give in an' lettim "liberate" yer vessel..

[tanguerra]

Can yer asks him how much to invade the North Pole? We can take out the Big Red fella before he gets airborne.

Yaaaaar! Pre-emptive strikes! I likes it. That's good honest pirate work as ever woz!

[Rev. Rowan Redbeard]

You know, when he starts out, his reindeer are fresh and he's awake and alert. The bugger dodges pretty fast, too.

But when he's done, he's completely worn out from his "duties" and probably wants to hurry home to take a nap.

If you're going to the pole, why not wait until he is gone, then put some mines on his landing strip? Better yet, put them under his mattress.

[DaveL]

YArrr...

That be a fine idea Rowan. He should pretty full from the 1 billion Xmas puddings he's meant to eat. The bugger won't be able to dodge a thing.

[OZ_Nick]

Argghhhh...

Oi hears he has an bounty of booty there Oz_Nick. Can yer asks him how much to invade the North Pole? We can take out the Big Red fella before he gets airborne.

Oi 'ad a werd wiv 'im Cap'n DaveL, 'e said ter arx ye wevver ther be enny oil at th' North Pole?

[tanguerra]

I dunno about no oil, but surely a raid is worth a try? There be lots of little men in pointy hats up there wot makes little toy trains and the like outa wood I hears.

I loike Captn Rowan's idea. We gets up there when the big fella is out - that be mighty sneaky thinkin'. Mighty sneaky indeed. Good pirate thinkin'.

It should yield a fair crop o little men in any case. They might make good galley slaves if ye sits em on little pillows? Wot think yez?

Yez can do with the toy trains wot yez wants far as I be concerned. Should get a few pennies on Arrrgh-Bay at the very least.

[Dan(da haole guy)]

ARR-oha..beggin' yer pARRGHdon, Cap'n tanguerra, but.....Satan's elves as galley slaves on likkle pillows?? ARR ye mad? nex' t'ing be gloves fo' da topgallant crews! oi suggest makin' da likkle buggahs skwat on they haunches t' row..or, if yez wanna be noice..build 'em likkle booster seats 'n' save da pillows fo' da Cap'n's cabin, ya?

p'raps da likkle wooden trains wen go be used for to carry teensy bits uv booty..put likkle engineer caps on some maggies & yer in bidnez..

[Rev. Rowan Redbeard]

Actually, I thought they would make good pillows.

Something for the rowers to sit on, ya know.

[tanguerra]

De ye think the big fellah would pay a ransom on 'em? That could be the way te go. Praps we ransom the little wee men, then we blows him outa the sky?

Then, praps I be overthinkin'? I have found in the past to my great chagrin, more than two steps in any pirate plan tends to be fraught wit all sorts of peril. Things ken go somewhat awrys, ye knows, if ye gets too complicated like.

[Dan(da haole guy)]

ARR-oha..too right, Cap'n tanguerra...we onna "Weeping Pustule" put ARR plans loike dis "Pillage....Drink..." & jus' t'keep boredom away, we sumtoimes go "Drink....Pillage" (no go reemember dat kine much, tho...)

[tanguerra]

Yarrr! I hear yez Dan! Aloha!

I find 'Pillage first, drink later' be the better arrangement of the two, howsoever, especially where Toothless Kate might be involved. Things have a way of endin in tears otherwise.

[black bart]

Arrrrr...I loiks ta let off me pistol loik any man...but it don't half give me an headache!

[Mad Willyum Bonney]

I just can't leave harbour widdowt me cutlass .

[Clifford]

Wid a-cutlass ye be gettin a swashbuckling feelin when ye run em through. Aye, a warm feeling o satifaction.

[black bart]

Arrrr...Havin beaten the pants off Cap'n Feathersword...I challenges ye to a duel...ye'll ave the cutlass...I'll ave the pistols...we'll walk ten paces away from each other, turn and fire.

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