There's a guy who offers free hugs in Sydney, at the Pitt Street mall, although I've never seen him down there. My friend has, and says he smells funny.
For a slogan, how about "Free hugs. Mind the hook though"
A pirate's life isn't easy; it takes a tough person. That's okay with you, though, since you a tough person. Even through many pirates have a reputation for not being the brightest souls on earth, you defy the sterotypes. You've got taste and education. Arr!