I be thinkin we left reality behind some times ago matey, and we's been jumping centuries more'n is strictly allowed an all. Have a swig of yer finest rum, and a smoke of yer special baccy, and sees how yer goes.
I'll start 's us off again:
"...never, yer treacherous, traitorous scum. We'll be a vanquishing you all, and when your survivors are languishing on community service, you'll be begging for the forgiveness of king..."
"...Bess, just recently recovered from the sex change operation that had a-taken London society so by surprise. Just then a huge..."
off yers go maties.