The Continuous Salty Tale

[DaveL]

Yarrrr..

Ey've been havin a few writers blocks on the Pirate front, creativity wise.

So I thought it moight be a good idea if we write a Continuous Salty Tale of our exploits on the high seas, or whatever evolves in your scabby dog minds...yarrr.

If those bloomin' continuous thread people with their gratuitous use of the word Depp can do it - so can we.

One suggestion: can we please have gratuitous use of Pirate language. I recommend the use of at least one YARR or ARGHHH during each post. This will also be helpin with the global warmin' if ye be sick of writin' in the Perpetual Arrggghhhh...

So c'mon lads and laddettes lets tell a continuous story.

Alwright then ey'll start...

Once upon a time a galleon set sail from the Port O' Spain. It was laden with dubloons of gold and silver.

YARRRR!!

[beagle]

Yarr, and her capn were famous the seven seas oer, on account of his only havin the one...

[DaveL]

...leg. From the focsle he did scan the view before him. And utter to himself YARRR. For a kings galleon did loom upon the horizon...

[beagle]

Link all boilers. Ahead full steam! he cried, fer he were ahead of his time. Yarr, if that be the kings ship it be full of....

[DaveL]

...noodles from afar. And he and the lads did lick their lips, for they were sick of eatin breadfruit and drinkin' rum. And the Captain (who was yet un-named) screamed to the lads...YARRR...

[beagle]

...last man to the gun deck be a fundamentalist, AAARRR or my names not Long Black ...

[DaveL]

...The Unmentionable (for he was yet un-named).

And the Great Galleon did sail (sorry steam) along side the Kings vessel. And their grapplin' hooks did swing forth, and the boardin planks were raised. With many mighty YARRSS the lads...

[beagle]

... fell in the sea. "Yarrrr, Other side mateys! " cried capn Long Black as he raised his eye skywards, an muttered under 'is breath...

[DaveL]

...Yarrr. Ey'd better just wear one eye patch coz ey' can't see a bloomin' thing.

And once the lads that hadn't drowned got back on board, they began a ferocious fight with the Kings men. 'Give us yer noodles ya lilly livered dogs' they cried. And the Kings men did say...

[beagle]

...never, yer treacheorus, traitorous scum. We'll be a vanquishing you all, and when your survivors are languishing on community service, you'll be begging for the forgiveness of king...

[black bart]

King....????

Ye Lilly livered, peg legged swabs...it be Queen, I know she be getting on a bit and looks a bit dog eared these days...but she be good Queen Bess and damn yer eyes!

[beagle]

I be thinkin we left reality behind some times ago matey, and we's been jumping centuries more'n is strictly allowed an all. Have a swig of yer finest rum, and a smoke of yer special baccy, and sees how yer goes.

I'll start 's us off again:

"...never, yer treacherous, traitorous scum. We'll be a vanquishing you all, and when your survivors are languishing on community service, you'll be begging for the forgiveness of king..."

"...Bess, just recently recovered from the sex change operation that had a-taken London society so by surprise. Just then a huge..."

off yers go maties.

[DaveL]

...cannon (not canon) ball pierced the hull of the Queens (nee Kings) vessel.

And there was little time left to plunder the noodly booty before she sunk to the bottom. 'Yarrrrgghh, quick' said Captain ----- (name still yet unmentioned)...

[Qwertyuiopasd]

...Hossenfefer the Slightly Tangerine. (as in "eric the red" only different)
'e did sail on, an thar crew was 'appy as could, be fer they had all thar gold thar carld e'er want. "yarrr..." Captian Hossenfefer sighed as he breathed in the mixture of victory (or gunpowder), the salty sea air, and thar smelly pirates, 'es reaction to the horrible smell...

[DaveL]

...of cooked noodles and gunpower. And the lads did feel much pride in their booty, for being on a pirate ship keeps you in great shape. They also enjoyed their meal!

Contented they lets off their muskets and anti-shipping missiles in celebration - YARRR!!!!. Then the Captain (who was rumoured to be called Hossenfeffer, but still unmentionable) did thus decree...