The Pirate thing with Maggots

Arrr, I be a pirate!

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Maggots are great because...

Real friends are hard to come by
3
18%
They have only one leg less than I do
0
No votes
They go well with a nice chardonnay
4
24%
Me parrot has disowned me
1
6%
All of the above
9
53%
 
Total votes : 17

The Pirate thing with Maggots

Postby DaveL on Wed Aug 22, 2007 7:36 am

Dear Lads,

The world on a ship is a lonely place indeed. There be more toime on yer hand than yer can poke a stick at. Isn't it nice to know, when yer all alone, that you can turn to your most humble friend for some excitin' onboard entertainment.

The Maggot!!

The Maggot is a Pirates friend. He be in plentiful supply, is a good listener and always wiggles his approval. And when yer hungry, he be downright bloody delicious!!

What stories haves yer got to tell us about you beloved little wriggly friends to almost as wriggly scurvy friends.
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Postby Dan(da haole guy) on Wed Aug 22, 2007 7:12 pm

ARR-oha..'n' inna case uv gangrene da likkle fellahs munch alla necrotic tissue..leavin' da gapin' wound all noice 'n' pink..apparently they don't do so well wit' dandruff 'n' scabies, tho..more's the pity...
KAULANA NA PUA A'O FSM..HANO HANO..FSM NO KA OI..
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Croquets

Postby black bart on Mon Sep 03, 2007 5:52 am

No I disagree...if ye sprinkles yer maggots wiv dandruff, ye can pass em off as Croquets!
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Postby Dan(da haole guy) on Wed Sep 05, 2007 12:01 am

ARR-oha..yeah, 'n' if yez put widdle hats 'n' coats on 'em, ya kin pass 'em orf as "ensigns"..hur hur hur..
KAULANA NA PUA A'O FSM..HANO HANO..FSM NO KA OI..
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Eaten

Postby black bart on Wed Sep 05, 2007 6:06 am

Arrrrr...it be toim fer a mutant Flesh eatin maggot story on the 'Far Fetched annecdotes' thread...afore it disapears off the end o the page.

A deserted hulk in the sargossa sea.

A curious Captain.

Squall blows up and Captain and his men get marooned on the old hulk.

They get eaten aloive by maggots.


Needs fleshin out (flesh...geddit) a bit to about 2,000 words.
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Postby Dan(da haole guy) on Wed Sep 05, 2007 8:19 pm

ARR-oha..black bart, mutant flesh-eatin' maggies from da Planet Thatcher, ya? 'n' dey prey onna dole queue refugees wot hadda become pyrates t'survive..
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Postby OZ_Nick on Wed Sep 05, 2007 8:23 pm

Yarr! Well Oi finds me crewe be a bit wary o' eatin maggots fer sum reason. Oi jest tells 'em they be little tiny witchetty grubs and they gobble em all up!
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Postby Dan(da haole guy) on Wed Sep 05, 2007 8:58 pm

ARR-oha...wudda neat idea! we stick 'em inna poi 'n' call it "Why'an Crunchy Vegan Dip" (cuz we dip da vegans into it, y'see..)
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Thatcher

Postby black bart on Thu Sep 06, 2007 8:25 am

Dan(da haole guy) wrote:ARR-oha..black bart, mutant flesh-eatin' maggies from da Planet Thatcher, ya? 'n' dey prey onna dole queue refugees wot hadda become pyrates t'survive..


Now why don't ye sit down on yer Hawaian Volcano and write that tale?

You could give it a first person twist...I was that dole queue pirate...the hero could be "Dan (da haole guy) Dare".

It would be too painful for me to write...it's too close to the truth!!!
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Postby The Black Spot on Thu Sep 06, 2007 8:43 am

Arrrr... One o' me cooks 'ad a proper maggit recipe. 'Eed take the hollowed out skull of a monkey, fill it wi' fishheads an' leave it in the sun.

A few days later, 'eed retrieve the skull, pull the crust off it, an hand it round the crew. 'Ee called it 'is "maggot surprise".

'Ad to shoot the bastid of course. 'Ee were ravin' bluddy mad.
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Riggly

Postby black bart on Fri Sep 07, 2007 5:53 am

I had a luverly Maggot Bhuna once...only trouble wiv it was the dish looked loik a big pile o pillau rice! Then ye noticed some o the rice wuz rigglin.
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Postby DaveL on Fri Sep 07, 2007 6:52 am

YArrrrr...

Did it look sumthin like this Bart?

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chutney

Postby black bart on Fri Sep 07, 2007 8:11 am

Arrrrrrrr...that be it...but where's the chutney?
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Postby anthrobabe on Fri Sep 07, 2007 10:54 am

I would like to formally complain to the managment (or bilge rat in charge) about this topic of discssion.
It is digusting.
How dare you subject me to this mess.
I am a fine well mannered upstanding bar wench and should not have to wade through such filth to..
(you are all to nevermind the fact that I had to click on the link to get here in the first place- personal responsibility has nothing to do with it-)

typical complaint isn't it!
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Discustin

Postby black bart on Fri Sep 07, 2007 3:57 pm

If ye thinks this is bad she should try eatein a Red Cow pie!

I also recommends this for sheer disgustingness:

http://www.venganza.org/forum/viewtopic.php?t=8535&start=0&postdays=0&postorder=asc&highlight=
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