Pirate Dating Tips

Arrr, I be a pirate!

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tanguerra
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Postby tanguerra » Fri Nov 23, 2007 6:26 am

Aaargh! Writing love letters ter wenches in double invisible filtered squid ink. I think I see the problem here gents. Perhaps that be too subtle, particular if the lady in question cannot read.

Yez could try being a bit more direct? There not be a wench who won't respond to being swept off her feet like by a dashin' sea-faring man (well, maybe there be some exceptions...).
Aaarrrrgggh!

Reed me booke. It's got pirates innit http:\\how-to-find-love.com

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black bart
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feet

Postby black bart » Fri Nov 23, 2007 5:07 pm

Arrrrrrr...I was swept off me feet once...unfortunately it were by Grape Shot an I still aint got one o me feet back!
The smoke wafted gently in the breeze across the poop deck and all seemed right in the world.

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~NoodleDemon~
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Postby ~NoodleDemon~ » Sat Nov 24, 2007 3:16 am

I'm sorry t' say that I've been swept offa me feet at least eleventy - three toimes... And always by the wenches...

But never by other blaggards loike meself. Never.
I hope you're on the recieving end of an improbability equation wherein something happens to you that's as unlikely as Rob Schneider winning a best actor Oscar on the same day Michael Jackson single handedly captures Osama Bin Laden. ~ Rainswept

O.K. Everything else is just stuff you do while you are waiting to have sex. Sin. WoE. ~ Warlord of Elephants

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Hippie Pirate
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Postby Hippie Pirate » Sat Nov 24, 2007 4:55 am

Twas just te other day when I lays me eyes on a pritty lil thing and swept 'er of 'er feet...Unfertunatly I 'ad once again outdone meself with grog, and she wern't such a lil thing after'll. Me back should be straightened out again here n a few trips to the Kireypractitioner or whatnot 'e calls 'imself.
Reducing global warming since 1989.

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Rev. Rowan Redbeard
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Postby Rev. Rowan Redbeard » Sat Nov 24, 2007 5:14 am

What with some of the pirates here looking like a pile of dirt, I wouldn't be surprised if they were swept off their feet by the Aproned Scrubber.
—Captain the Reverend Lord C.S. Rowan, Lord of Glencoe, Minister of Pastafarianism, Gentleman Pirate

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The poster takes no responsibility for any offense taken where none was meant.

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black bart
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Swept

Postby black bart » Sat Nov 24, 2007 5:59 am

Harr, harr harrr...ye has a point thar matey.
The smoke wafted gently in the breeze across the poop deck and all seemed right in the world.

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Dogma's A Bitch
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Postby Dogma's A Bitch » Sat Nov 24, 2007 8:13 am

Um....... Is being swept off'n yer feet anything like using a vacuum cleaner on yerself? I've had some experience.......

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Hippie Pirate
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Postby Hippie Pirate » Sat Nov 24, 2007 12:49 pm

Does slidin out a some chairs onta the ground count as anything?



Never did make it ta the werewolf huntin tonight...




*cough*



HEY LOOK ITS SNOWING!!!
Reducing global warming since 1989.

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black bart
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Knuckles

Postby black bart » Sun Nov 25, 2007 4:23 am

Dogma's A Bitch wrote:Um....... Is being swept off'n yer feet anything like using a vacuum cleaner on yerself? I've had some experience.......


Have ye met Knuckles O'Shuffle yet?
The smoke wafted gently in the breeze across the poop deck and all seemed right in the world.

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~NoodleDemon~
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Postby ~NoodleDemon~ » Sun Nov 25, 2007 12:20 pm

Me dance partner?

Where be the scallywag now?
I hope you're on the recieving end of an improbability equation wherein something happens to you that's as unlikely as Rob Schneider winning a best actor Oscar on the same day Michael Jackson single handedly captures Osama Bin Laden. ~ Rainswept

O.K. Everything else is just stuff you do while you are waiting to have sex. Sin. WoE. ~ Warlord of Elephants

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Dogma's A Bitch
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Postby Dogma's A Bitch » Mon Nov 26, 2007 4:43 am

If'n I get yer meaning,Bart, I attempted to converse
with Knuckles ..... but with me hook and all.......
Arrrrrr... "twas not a pretty sight.
Just swing the damn sabre.... you're bound to hit sumptin'.

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Auntie Blackbeard
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advice

Postby Auntie Blackbeard » Mon Nov 26, 2007 5:20 pm

Dear D Bitch

You can always write to Auntie in strictest confidence for all sorts of advise and remedies of a seafaring type.

I've never received any missives from Knuckles O'Shuffle, I think it's probably because he's too busy ......

....repairing the main sail.

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black bart
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No Hoper

Postby black bart » Mon Nov 26, 2007 5:44 pm

Dear Auntie

I know this is not strictly your thread, but your response to my latest letter on my love life worries me...what exactly does ye mean by 'No Hoper?'
The smoke wafted gently in the breeze across the poop deck and all seemed right in the world.

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walktheplank
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Postby walktheplank » Mon Nov 26, 2007 5:52 pm

yarr Hi Auntie

Can you resolve an issue for me. Was Black Bart anywhere near the Antarctic over the weekend.
The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who in the name of charity and goodwill shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon thee.

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Dogma's A Bitch
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Postby Dogma's A Bitch » Mon Nov 26, 2007 7:42 pm

I need a little help here, I'm new.

In order to be P.C. (Pirately Correct), I have ordered my Full Pirate Regalia. To be safe, I ordered both the Home and Away uniforms and three caps (Home, Away, Home alternate).
I've sent directly to Pittsburgh for my authentic stuff (no knock-offs needed here, thanks).

My question is this..... Does FULL Pirate Regalia include:

1. Cleats?
2. Batting glove and helmet?
3. Jock strap and cup?

Just wondering......
Just swing the damn sabre.... you're bound to hit sumptin'.


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