The Maritime Serious Discussion Rant

Arrr, I be a pirate!

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Postby Dan(da haole guy) on Fri Jul 27, 2007 11:41 am

Arr-oha..The Black Spot: yunno 'ow we wen end up li'dat? we wen run outta rum, Playbilge wen get washed ovah da side (OK, tho..it preety crusty 'n' float mo' bettah dan "Weeping Pustule"), alla teredos holdin' da ship t'gedda went on strike fo' mo' decent wood..AUE! eet all good, still..we be pirates 'n' dis stuff happen, ya?! no can stay 'n' gossip/rant--off fo' da mid-morning pillage...c youse...
KAULANA NA PUA A'O FSM..HANO HANO..FSM NO KA OI..
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B&Q

Postby black bart on Mon Jul 30, 2007 4:53 am

Teredos = Wood boring insects: AARRRR ye as more nautical knowledge than the loiks o me ships Carpenter what I picked up from The Dry Tortugas. I don't think he'd ever come accross damp rot and infestation afore. I told him there were a few repair jobs what needed urgent attention ie the main mast, the midden mast, the focsle, the poop, the orlop, the gun deck, the keel, the tiller, the portholes, and the plank were lookin a bit iffy. The blaggard only arsked if we were anywhere near a B&Q!
The smoke wafted gently in the breeze across the poop deck and all seemed right in the world.
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Postby tanguerra on Tue Jul 31, 2007 10:05 pm

Arr-oha..The Black Spot: yunno 'ow we wen end up li'dat? we wen run outta rum, Playbilge wen get washed ovah da side (OK, tho..it preety crusty 'n' float mo' bettah dan "Weeping Pustule"), alla teredos holdin' da ship t'gedda went on strike fo' mo' decent wood..AUE! eet all good, still..we be pirates 'n' dis stuff happen, ya?! no can stay 'n' gossip/rant--off fo' da mid-morning pillage...c youse...


Yez all gets sent to Pirate Hell not fer failin to make proper repairs to yer vessel or to keep yer peg leg in order (the penalty for that is Pirate Pergatory in which there is no PlayBilge nor no cabin boys neither).

Ye gets sent to Pirate Hell for failing to keep up yer Yaaaaaars! Failin' to do yer fair share of plunderin', wenchin', drinkin' and cursin'.

There be a great long list of pirate sins. There be the sin o' droppin' yer cutlass in the face of the enemy and runnin' away te hide. That will get ye a nice comfy couch in Pirate Hell, clean underwear and no smokin' fer instance. Don't yez know nuffin?

Calls this a Rant? Blast ye all ta da Ravioli Kingdom Come! If yez wants to be sitting at the feet of the great Flyin' Spaghetti Monster when yer gizzards be finally slit ye'll have ter be a great deal more quarrelsome than this, that's for sure.
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Postby Dan(da haole guy) on Tue Jul 31, 2007 10:38 pm

ARR-oha..mahalo 'n' a hula hip wiggle t' tanguerra f' rantin' some sense..ho-kay den, dis one beeg hybolic* mix-breed rant on da sorry state o' hostages...dey f*****' whine abaht ebberyt'ing.."splinters, weak coffee, (not enough) weevils in the bread, clumpy wig powder" and on and on...we wen chop a cupple unneeded appendages off 'em to take they mindz off'n they troubles like da considerate scum dat we be & dey whine abaht THAT..(not too many, tho-mo' bettah ransom if mos' uv da hostage-parts are still attached)..we wen miss da daze uv REAL hostages..ahhh, wdf...end o' rant--toime t' guzzle rum an' get da evenin' pillage underway...oh yeah--ARRRRGGGHHH!!












*hybolic-lotsa woids wut we no rilly know wha' dey mean but sound 'way cool
KAULANA NA PUA A'O FSM..HANO HANO..FSM NO KA OI..
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Postby ChowMein on Tue Jul 31, 2007 11:08 pm

Dan(da haole guy) wrote: wen miss da daze uv REAL hostages..


@#$%&! HOSSAGIZ ! WURFLISS @#$%&! HOSSAGIZ ALL DA DANG RACKIT DAY MAKES WID THE CRYEN AN DA SCREEMIN WEN YE CUTS OFFIN A WEE BIT ARR! TOO @#$%^&! Taint wurf the bodder I sez , ye shud ere sum ub dem planing bowt da grubby food , en rats , en scury en hole lottsa udder stuff @#$%&! HOSSAGIZ ! Day taint gots no manners ! Dang hossagiz .

Yers Troolee , Mad Willum Bonney
Quote :" ARRR! GAGAGAGA ! , ...de sailin' loife fer me. ARR! GAGAGAGAGa....arr gagaga.....a...". (Popeye The Sailor)
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Postby Dan(da haole guy) on Wed Aug 01, 2007 12:13 am

ARR-oha....^ now DAT be a foine f*****' rant..me an' da res' uv da motley crew uv da "Weeping Pustule" go make one beeg "Mad Willum Bonney Respec' Pillage" in yo' honour (mebbe we go sen' you couple sacks a doubloons too..mebbe not, eitha--we respec' you 'n' all, but we greedy buggahs, too.....ho ho ho)..ARRRRGGGHHHHH!!!!
KAULANA NA PUA A'O FSM..HANO HANO..FSM NO KA OI..
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Hammock

Postby black bart on Wed Aug 01, 2007 5:35 am

AARRRRR, Don't get me wrong loik me hearties, I has nothin against dialects, but arter readin those two posts in a row...I is goin ta have ta lie down in me hammock fer a few hours!
The smoke wafted gently in the breeze across the poop deck and all seemed right in the world.
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Postby The Black Spot on Wed Aug 01, 2007 11:23 am

All we needs now be a rant from E.Raser. That'll make yer eye water.
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Postby Dan(da haole guy) on Wed Aug 01, 2007 8:36 pm

ARR-oha..black bart..cupple ahrs inna hammock, ya? da new Playbilge musta bin dee-livered..'n' pliz t'recycle da tissues, eh?
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Re: Hammock

Postby ChowMein on Wed Aug 01, 2007 9:35 pm

black bart wrote:AARRRRR, Don't get me wrong loik me hearties, I has nothin against dialects, but arter readin those two posts in a row...


Whut ye goan on abowt Bartie ?!

Iz ye insinuatin' me an Capn' Dan (da holy guy) be havin an acksint loike dem FROOOG ! pirats ?!

@#$%&! Frooog pirats USELISS FROG PIRATS ...YE CANT CARRY A CONVERSASHUN WID EM....ALL DAY SAY IZ RIBBIT RIBBIT RIBBIT !....YE JUSS STEP ON DARE WEE TOES AN DAY CROAK ! ...HECK ...YE HELPs YERSELF WID DERE LEG OR TOO WEN YE FEEL A BIT PECKISH AN YE BE HUNGRY AGIN AN OUR LATER ! DANG @#$%&! FROG PIRATS !

LOOK WHAT YE DUN BART !....I GOTSA GO FINE ME MEDS NOW !


Yers Troolee , Mad Will
Quote :" ARRR! GAGAGAGA ! , ...de sailin' loife fer me. ARR! GAGAGAGAGa....arr gagaga.....a...". (Popeye The Sailor)
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Postby Dan(da haole guy) on Wed Aug 01, 2007 10:38 pm

ARR-oha...AUE!! black bart..dat be MEAN..jus' plain mean..^ sez it all..& mahalo fo' dat, too, Mad Will..we all jus' tryina be da bes' pirate-kine we can be 'n' no got da toime fo' da beeg words 'n' landlubbah syntactical constructionism..so, pliz cut sum slack, ya? & wen we all get to da nex' "Annual Piratical Funken Druckup" @ da newly refurbished (eh??) Admiral Benbough, we go look back a'dis 'n' laff ('n' swill rum 'n' tickle da servin' wenches..wooo!)..
KAULANA NA PUA A'O FSM..HANO HANO..FSM NO KA OI..
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Postby tanguerra on Thu Aug 02, 2007 12:06 am

we all jus' tryina be da bes' pirate-kine we can be 'n' no got da toime fo' da beeg words 'n' landlubbah syntactical constructionism.


I'm wid you matey! Oh! Now ye're just bein semantic an all. I got no patience for dem semantic rants and hair splittun an willy wally name changing dicktionarying. Land lubbering post-modernistic deconstructin' clap-trappin showin off. Jus look it up sez I! Wouldn't be no show-offin with a dirk in their gizzard. That'd be a different tune then!

(Dose Frogs! Damn their eyes! Why can't they talk proper? And what's with all the cheese?)
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Postby Dan(da haole guy) on Thu Aug 02, 2007 2:23 am

Arr-oha..akchully, alla cheese no be so bad..it preetee inoku..innocc..inkoc..AARRGGHH..safe 'til one buggah go cut it..eeeeeewwwwww..remin' me uv only toime (mahalo nui loa to da FSM!)
i wen get too close to Cap'n Cronan's sox...(hope dey wuz sox..brrrrrr..)..

Aue! no mo' toime fo' da kine rant.."Weeping Pustule"'z off t' pillage/annoy/confuse da unwary...AARRGGHH..
KAULANA NA PUA A'O FSM..HANO HANO..FSM NO KA OI..
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Sigh

Postby black bart on Thu Aug 02, 2007 5:23 am

SIGH...looks like I'll be in me Hammock for the rest o the day!
The smoke wafted gently in the breeze across the poop deck and all seemed right in the world.
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Postby DaveL on Thu Aug 02, 2007 5:35 am

Yarrrrr...Oi won't ask what you be doin wif yerself.
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