British government reject pirate petition

Arrr, I be a pirate!

Moderator: All Things Mods

British government reject pirate petition

Postby European Bri on Sat May 05, 2007 10:30 am

The issue of global wrming is high on the political agenda in the UK at the moment, so in an effort to assist the current goverment in the attempt to combat this grave problem I raised a petition to aid them. Alas I was not taken seriously and my efforts were rejected. Below is the petition and the reason for rejection;

Hi,

I'm sorry to inform you that your petition has been rejected.

Your petition was classed as being in the following categories:

* Intended to be humorous, or has no point about government
policy



You have four weeks in which to do this, after which your
petition will appear in the list of rejected petitions.

Your petition reads:

We the undersigned petition the Prime Minister to: 'combat
global warming by converting Her Majestys Navy warships into
galleons and staffing them with pirates, as preached by Church
of the FSM'

In accordance with the teachings of the Church of the Flying
Spaghetti Monster, the rise in global warming can be directly
attributed to the decreasing number of pirates who sail the
seven seas. By kitting out all of the navies warships as
galleons, and transforming our sailors to pirates, a huge step
can be taken to restore the ozone layer to its former glory.
It would also address falling recruitment levels , as pirates
are cool.

-- the ePetitions team
:cry:
User avatar
European Bri
Conchigliette Convert
 
Posts: 3
Joined: Sat May 05, 2007 10:10 am

Postby EarthRise on Sat May 05, 2007 1:10 pm

I'm not surprised that they rejected a request based on the principles of a parody religion. They should be prone to rejecting them from actual religions, no?
[...] the difficulty of believing that a perfect and complex eye could be formed by natural selection, though insuperable by our imagination, should not be considered as subversive of the theory.
-Darwin
User avatar
EarthRise
Hox God
 
Posts: 2330
Joined: Sun Aug 27, 2006 3:35 pm
Location: who wants to know?

Postby Duke on Sat May 05, 2007 10:59 pm

Well, those Brits never have been much of a friend of Piracy, them and their Royal Navy.


Duke
"In the first place, God made idiots. That was for practice. Then he made school boards."

--Mark Twain


He who fights with monsters might take care lest he thereby become a monster. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you.

--Friedrich Nietzsche


"If it turns out that there is a God, I don't think that he's evil. But the worst that you can say about him is that basically he's an underachiever."

--Woody Allen
User avatar
Duke
Prophet of Pastafarianism
 
Posts: 8483
Joined: Thu Oct 27, 2005 4:17 am
Location: Under a Large Pile of Snow

Postby Occam on Mon May 07, 2007 7:46 am

Duke wrote:Well, those Brits never have been much of a friend of Piracy, them and their Royal Navy.


Duke


Is that so? Then why do most pirates these days have English accents?

The Royal Navy was created to protect slave traders from being attacked by emancipating pirates. It was not the British people who were against pirates, just people getting rich from evil schemes. The Service is just the military wing of the anti-pirate establishment.
Pastafarianism - The Religion Most Likely To Be True TM
User avatar
Occam
Bucatini Buccanneer
 
Posts: 204
Joined: Thu Sep 22, 2005 8:40 am
Location: Manchester, England

Postby hexhunter on Mon May 07, 2007 5:56 pm

Actually, in the "most haunted live pirates" thing that has been on this weekend they said that privateers were pirates hired by the government to attack enemy ships and share their cargo with the government.
User avatar
hexhunter
Ziti Zealot
 
Posts: 20
Joined: Tue Nov 14, 2006 6:36 am

Postby Duke on Mon May 07, 2007 7:26 pm

Occam wrote:
Duke wrote:Well, those Brits never have been much of a friend of Piracy, them and their Royal Navy.


Duke


Is that so? Then why do most pirates these days have English accents?

The Royal Navy was created to protect slave traders from being attacked by emancipating pirates. It was not the British people who were against pirates, just people getting rich from evil schemes. The Service is just the military wing of the anti-pirate establishment.


Ah, I see. It's good that we have the British people behind us, regardless of their nasty navy.


Duke
"In the first place, God made idiots. That was for practice. Then he made school boards."

--Mark Twain


He who fights with monsters might take care lest he thereby become a monster. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you.

--Friedrich Nietzsche


"If it turns out that there is a God, I don't think that he's evil. But the worst that you can say about him is that basically he's an underachiever."

--Woody Allen
User avatar
Duke
Prophet of Pastafarianism
 
Posts: 8483
Joined: Thu Oct 27, 2005 4:17 am
Location: Under a Large Pile of Snow

Postby Cuddly_Carpy on Mon May 07, 2007 7:29 pm

Yeah, Privateers were basically pirates with bits of paper what said tey were allowed to be pirates, just avoid ships of whichever counry employed them...
Image
User avatar
Cuddly_Carpy
Cannelloni Cannoneer
 
Posts: 135
Joined: Fri Dec 08, 2006 4:50 pm
Location: Dumpstable

Postby European Bri on Wed May 09, 2007 8:32 pm

Where does a bucaneer fit into all this then?
User avatar
European Bri
Conchigliette Convert
 
Posts: 3
Joined: Sat May 05, 2007 10:10 am

Postby Duke on Wed May 09, 2007 10:00 pm

Buccaneer is another word for Pirates, in my dictionary (literally).


Duke
"In the first place, God made idiots. That was for practice. Then he made school boards."

--Mark Twain


He who fights with monsters might take care lest he thereby become a monster. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you.

--Friedrich Nietzsche


"If it turns out that there is a God, I don't think that he's evil. But the worst that you can say about him is that basically he's an underachiever."

--Woody Allen
User avatar
Duke
Prophet of Pastafarianism
 
Posts: 8483
Joined: Thu Oct 27, 2005 4:17 am
Location: Under a Large Pile of Snow

Postby hexhunter on Thu May 10, 2007 4:14 am

Buccaneers were french and english pirates, the are clled buccaneers 'cause they had barbecues called Bucan's (SP?)

So, they basically rebelled against England and France when they were fighting.

I look it up to check if it's true, also, it's a damn shame the PM ignored your petition, mabye Gordon is a pirate lover :D
User avatar
hexhunter
Ziti Zealot
 
Posts: 20
Joined: Tue Nov 14, 2006 6:36 am

Postby European Bri on Thu May 10, 2007 6:45 pm

Decided to google Scottish pirates and discovered one James Browne, a privateer, so perhaps Gordon is linked to the noble calling of piracy by a long lost ancestor. Also found a Celtic pirate who had the fantasic moniker of Lusty Malcolm. Check out http://www.cindyvallar.com/scottish.html for a potted history of hibernian buccaneering.
:fsm_yarr:
User avatar
European Bri
Conchigliette Convert
 
Posts: 3
Joined: Sat May 05, 2007 10:10 am

Postby Tonystark5008 on Tue May 15, 2007 12:49 am

Well let me say that it might have made sense to petition something that might seem just a little more respectable and non-"weird". Think of something the christians would do for example. MAybe ask for public marches and parades, etc.

http://www.myspace.com/jasonpalth
Tonystark5008
Conchigliette Convert
 
Posts: 6
Joined: Thu May 10, 2007 12:14 pm

Postby PantyGnawer on Tue Mar 25, 2008 3:18 am

PG sneaks in and steals all your rum
User avatar
PantyGnawer
Spam Bob Grill Pants
 
Posts: 4481
Joined: Sat Mar 10, 2007 9:17 pm
Location: Ask yer Mom.


Return to Pirate Discussion

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 3 guests