Dear Capn's Log
It be me birfday tomorra an
last year thee crew forgot!
I left enough hints fer thee blaggards loik a Spaniard's Head wiv 25 candles on thee top an a speshull batch o Fish Head Stew wiv croutons spellin out thee words BB25(again)...
It were no use
not even a kiss from thee First Mate!
If onlee I hadn't a sold me mummy to thee Aztecs she moight ave send me a pair o socks or a cake.
Ah well...I shall crack open a barrel o rum an read meself an anthology of me best Far Fetched Tales...an ave thee crew Keel Hauled, that always cheers me up.
The smoke wafted gently in the breeze across the poop deck and all seemed right in the world.