AND NOW A WORD FROM OUR SPONSORS...
Fuse-a-wig - Staple by Staple
Yarrrrrâ€¦Lads. Beinâ€™ youthful and virile be all connected with yer wenchinâ€™ ability. And yer wenchinâ€™ ability often be linked the amount of hair yer have on yer head. For the modern day pirate, beinâ€™ bald is a scourge, and there be nuthinâ€™ worse than seeinâ€™ a chrome domed pirate or beinâ€™ called 'Nude-nut', 'Kojak' or 'Dr Evil'.
Picture this. Yer ship hits the nearest port and yer head for the nearest waterinâ€™ hole. And there seated in the corner yer spy a lovely wench whoâ€™s caught yer eye. The tavern music is flowinâ€™ along with the rum... thereâ€™s a good vibe goinâ€™ on, and then yer take yer tricorn offâ€¦music stopsâ€¦heads turnâ€¦"Heâ€™s BALD!!" Suddenly youâ€™re all all alone as yer wench slips off to chat up some hirsute navy dog.
Well lads there is an answer. Fuse-a-wig
be the most modern hair replacement technique this side of the port of Antigua. Using our revolutionary office equipment technology, well staple your hair back usin' our Staple by Staple technology. And before yer know it the wenches will be flockinâ€™ to yer.
Ereâ€™s what our happy customers have had to say about Fuse-a-wig
Capn Cuthbert Bilson
â€˜When Oi wuz a lad growin up, Oi had a full head of lovely â€˜air that the wenches just loved. In fact Oi use to put Chewbacca to shame with me lovely locks. Then over night it startin fallinâ€™ out.
In me obvious desperation, Oi headed for the nearest Fuse-a-Wig salon Oi could foind. The pain was excruciatinâ€™ but the results were instant. Now every Wookie wench on this side of the galaxy is after me. Thanks Fuse-a-Wig!'
Capn Ham Yoyo.
So there you â€˜ave it lads. If a follicular challenge be yer challenge, then head for Fuse-a-Wig
â€“ it bloominâ€™ hurtsâ€¦but not as much as beinâ€™ bald. Yarrrrrr