.. in me quarters, trimmin me beard, which has grown large these many months at sea. Where be me aftershave?"
Just then, a sailor said "Aye, ye ate it, capn."
"What nonsense be this? I did not eat me botlle o after shave. Ye lie!!!" Said the captain furiously, with his good eye twitching extrememly fast in a wierd fashion.
The sailor repiled, "Aye. I saw it with me own three eyes!!!"
"Ye be not havin three eyes, sailor!" Said the captain who was walking towards him.
"Aye. I do, capn."
The captian looked at the sailor with suspision, and after a few days, he realized "Aye, ye do have three eyes. Amazin. Ye must not miss anything with those peepers!"
"I don't, capn."
Then, suddenly a sailor came up yelling "The end is near!!" And then...