Pirates and Equal Opportunities

[DaveL]

YArrrrr...

Oi's had a great job as a dental nurse durin me cross dressin years. The customers loved seein a big nurse runnin around with an eye patch and pegleg. Unfortunately me beard and deep booming voice gaves me away.

[Griffin]

Ye bunch of lilly-livered softies. Oi ties a rope ter me ook and yanks me tooth out when they giv me gip. Dentists - paaaaaaaar! oo'ever herd such namby-pamby molly-coddlin drivel.

Dammit - cross-threaded agin - Oi mistook it fer the insult challenge.

[black bart]

Griffin wrote:

Ye bunch of lilly-livered softies. Oi ties a rope ter me ook and yanks me tooth out when they giv me gip.

Blimey...Ye needs to take more care with yer pearly whites, the onle rope I uses on me teeth is when I'm flossing!

[DaveL]

YArrrrr...

Yer must 'ave big gaps between yer teeth there Bart!. Oi dont have any teeth now, so O'ive got nuthin to worry abouts.

Oi use ter hate sittin in the chair and tryin to talk under local anaethesia, when youse are all numbs. The dentist wuz the only person that could understands what Oi wuz sayin.

[The Black Spot]

anaethesia? GAHH! A bottle or two o' rum sorts it out.

[black bart]

YYYAARRRR...I believes in good dental hygiene fer all me crew. I sends em fer a regular six monthly check up. Unfortunately they aint on the same health plan as us Captains what be too expensive fer the deck swabs. As a result they has to go to Griffin's dentist and by the time their 25 they aint got a tooth left!

[The Black Spot]

I believes in good dental hygiene fer all me crew.

Same 'ere lad. I fear fer me crew's well-being, so I protect the swab's teeth by givin' them hardly anything to eat. They'll thank me in the long run.

[black bart]

I fear the same cannot be said fer yer ship's Bengal Tiger!!!!

[Griffin]

YYYAARRRR...I believes in good dental hygiene fer all me crew. I sends em fer a regular six monthly check up. Unfortunately they aint on the same health plan as us Captains what be too expensive fer the deck swabs. As a result they has to go to Griffin's dentist and by the time their 25 they aint got a tooth left!

An a tidy profit I bin makin too. Yaaaaaaaar!! Me ook be me best mate.

[Swatopluk]

Me crew gets wooden teeth replacements as part of the mandatory health insurance (buried lockbox system). Gold teeth proved to be impractical because the usual suspects always came back toothless from the wenchodrome or the rum den. I experimented with steel teeth (including a close combat biter's course) but they are eaten away by the anti-scurvy drops and the dragon breath the crew develops after their favorite fish-head stew.

[black bart]

Favourite Fish Head Stew!!!!!!

Are ye stark raving mad on board that ship matey!

[Swatopluk]

My cook is a master. His new specialty (esp. in Austarlian waters) is jellyfish spiced with fireweed .

[DaveL]

YArrrr...

If it's a jelly fish from the northern tropics, Oi'd be givin it a wide berth!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Box_jellyfish

The only way yer can swim in the water with 'em is to wear panty hose. Oi's be tellin the truth!

[black bart]

HHHAAARRRR...that reminds me o the time I went smimmin in the Barrier reef off Bunderburg. I be an hard sea worn pirate (???!!!) but I be afraid o sharks loik any man...then the buggers showed me a list o the dangerous creatures what lurk in Ozzy waters...Sharks were the least of me worries:

Stone fish,
Jelly Fish,
Blue Octopuses,
Green Octopuses,
Persimmon Octopuses,
Sea Snakes,
More Jelly Fish...

Nice Turtles though!

[Swatopluk]

We got some protests from the sea wasp commitee against our cook but with support from the fugu league we were able to repel it.