Corrupt a wish.

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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby Edd on Mon Feb 21, 2011 4:30 pm

Granted. Welcome to the Borg.

I wish I could orchestrate the singularity (I'd sell admission tickets).
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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby Ubi Dubius on Wed Mar 16, 2011 10:24 pm

Granted, but now that we're all one, you have to share the ticket money.

I wish my debts were paid off by a mysterious benefactor.
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Keeping up appearances is a very important activity in religion; in fact, maintaining tattered illusions is its main activity. - Richard Wade, on Friendlyatheist.com
We make an idol of our fear and call it God. -Ingmar Bergman, The Seventh Seal
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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby Roy Hunter on Thu Mar 17, 2011 5:34 am

Granted. Gadaffi has to do something with all that money.

I wish this damn cold would go away.
"I don't mean to sound bitter, cynical or cruel; but I am, so that's how it comes out." ~ Bill Hicks.
"To argue with a person who has renounced reason is like administering medicine to the dead." ~ Thomas Paine.
"One should not believe everything one reads on the internet." ~ Abraham Lincoln.
"If you're making a political point wearing a balaclava, you're a c***. It was true for the IRA and it's true now." ~ daftbeaker.
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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby gronank on Thu Mar 17, 2011 9:13 am

Granted, you now have a melting nuclear reactor in your back garden.

I wish I could sleep in tomorow.
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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby Edd on Fri Mar 18, 2011 9:28 am

Granted. You now have absolutely nothing to motivate you into getting out of bed.

I wish others were as excited about my ideas as I am.
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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby Arkaeon on Fri Mar 18, 2011 2:05 pm

Granted, and we've already filed patent claims for any invention you might ever think up. No royalties for you.

I wish I had some spiced rum.
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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby Ham Nox on Tue Apr 05, 2011 3:32 pm

This seller makes no comment as to the radioactive content of their products.

I wish my dog could make up its mind about whether it wants to go outside or not.
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............................P(X|A) * P(A)
P(A|X) = -----------------------------------
...............P(X|A) * P(A) + P(X|~A) * P(~A)

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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby gronank on Tue Apr 05, 2011 5:54 pm

granted, it will go outside and never come back

I wish my shoes were fashionable
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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby Roy Hunter on Tue Apr 05, 2011 6:49 pm

Granted. A mugger shoots you and steals them because they are so fashionable. While you are lying bleeding in the street, some rats eat your hair and a priest touches you inappropriately.

I wish I didn't have to work tomorrow.
"I don't mean to sound bitter, cynical or cruel; but I am, so that's how it comes out." ~ Bill Hicks.
"To argue with a person who has renounced reason is like administering medicine to the dead." ~ Thomas Paine.
"One should not believe everything one reads on the internet." ~ Abraham Lincoln.
"If you're making a political point wearing a balaclava, you're a c***. It was true for the IRA and it's true now." ~ daftbeaker.
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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby TwistedSister on Tue Apr 05, 2011 7:54 pm

Granted, you get fired because your boss thinks you've been messing with his wife and he also informed your wife about it, so now you are also getting a divorce.

I wish my cats would always keep their fannies inside the litter box while pooping.
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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby Ubi Dubius on Tue Apr 05, 2011 8:59 pm

Granted, but to be sure, they never take their fannies out of the box. They just drag it around the house using only their fore feet.

I wish my per diem were higher.
Davros, Attorney and Pieces of Law
Keeping up appearances is a very important activity in religion; in fact, maintaining tattered illusions is its main activity. - Richard Wade, on Friendlyatheist.com
We make an idol of our fear and call it God. -Ingmar Bergman, The Seventh Seal
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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby Roy Hunter on Wed Apr 06, 2011 5:03 am

Granted. The Escobar family always look after their enforcers well (seeing as their career is usually so short).

TwistedSister wrote:...you get fired because your boss thinks you've been messing with his wife
My boss is a woman. So is her boss. So is her boss. In fact, there are no Y chromosomes in my chain of command right up to director level. More than 90% of the people in my department are women. I've got to fight the power!

I wish I didn't have to fight the power.
"I don't mean to sound bitter, cynical or cruel; but I am, so that's how it comes out." ~ Bill Hicks.
"To argue with a person who has renounced reason is like administering medicine to the dead." ~ Thomas Paine.
"One should not believe everything one reads on the internet." ~ Abraham Lincoln.
"If you're making a political point wearing a balaclava, you're a c***. It was true for the IRA and it's true now." ~ daftbeaker.
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Roy Hunter
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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby daftbeaker on Wed Apr 06, 2011 5:29 am

Granted. Flava Flav moves into your offie to fight the power for you. The rest of Public Enemy said they were sorry but they couldn't make it.

I wish children could arrange within themselves to all turn up at the same time so I don't have to give up my lunchtime and an hour after school to watch them do a test.
A casual stroll through the lunatic asylum shows that faith does not prove anything - Friedrich Nietzsche

But why is the rum gone?!
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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby Roy Hunter on Wed Apr 06, 2011 5:39 am

Granted. They all turn up at your door, out of their brains on WKD and Red Bull, at three in the morning, and drip kebab sauce all over your carpets.
daftbeaker wrote:Flava Flav moves into your offie to fight the power for you.
He moves into my off-license? That's an unusual move, but it might work...

I wish I had an off-license.
"I don't mean to sound bitter, cynical or cruel; but I am, so that's how it comes out." ~ Bill Hicks.
"To argue with a person who has renounced reason is like administering medicine to the dead." ~ Thomas Paine.
"One should not believe everything one reads on the internet." ~ Abraham Lincoln.
"If you're making a political point wearing a balaclava, you're a c***. It was true for the IRA and it's true now." ~ daftbeaker.
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Roy Hunter
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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby daftbeaker on Wed Apr 06, 2011 6:30 am

Granted. Unfortunately Glasgow City Council subcontracts the forms to me and you end up owning an offal licence.

I wish my error spotting skills hadn't suddenly disappeared :idiot:
A casual stroll through the lunatic asylum shows that faith does not prove anything - Friedrich Nietzsche

But why is the rum gone?!
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