Corrupt a wish.

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Qwertyuiopasd
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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby Qwertyuiopasd » Thu Oct 21, 2010 8:40 pm

This wish grant and corruption brought to you by Electromagnetic Pulses. Also: ICBMs.

I wish the apocalypse didn't have to be the end.

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Ham Nox
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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby Ham Nox » Thu Oct 21, 2010 9:11 pm

Granted. It is only the beginning of god's long, terrible reign of terror.

I wish there were no false alarms about the end of the world.

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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby Qwertyuiopasd » Thu Oct 21, 2010 9:24 pm

Granted. They adjust the criteria too much, though, and no there is no warning even in the event of apocalypse.

I wish the four horsemen would accept applications.

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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby Ham Nox » Thu Oct 21, 2010 10:02 pm

Granted. They accept your application to becoming their flirting buddy. Oh wait, did you mean to give that to El?

I wish for girl scout cookies. Thin mints, to be precise.

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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby Qwertyuiopasd » Thu Oct 21, 2010 10:56 pm

Granted. But they're urinal cookies. Girl Scout themed urinal cookies. Don't ask me why.

Also: it's funny because thin isn't very precise.

I wish my jokes weren't so dirty.

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Roy Hunter
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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby Roy Hunter » Fri Oct 22, 2010 4:54 am

Granted. They are now clean jokes. They are also inoffensive to women, ethnic and religious minorities, they do not single out people on the grounds of sexuality, disability or lifestyle. That's why they're not funny any more.

I wish my wife would suddenly start craving some impractical and expensive shoes (so I could say "well you can buy them, seeing as I bought an oscilloscope without telling you" and get away with it).

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Ham Nox
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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby Ham Nox » Fri Oct 22, 2010 7:50 am

Granted. She doesn't want to clonk you on the head with any of her nice, expensive ones, so to the mall she must go!

I wish I didn't have all these little kid friends on facebook that I have to deliberately hide a quarter of my posts from.

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Qwertyuiopasd
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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby Qwertyuiopasd » Fri Oct 22, 2010 10:10 am

Granted. They grow up faster than you thought, and now you have even more constant reminders of your ever growing age.

I wish I could stop for death.

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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby bacon » Fri Oct 22, 2010 1:33 pm

Granted. You stopped in the middle of the street and hit by the #10 bus.

I wish that I got better rest last night.

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Ham Nox
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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby Ham Nox » Fri Oct 29, 2010 9:39 am

Granted. You wouldn't BELIEVE how luxurious the new jail cells are.

I wish I could have salmon for breakfast.

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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby Qwertyuiopasd » Fri Oct 29, 2010 10:15 am

Granted. You are now a bear. Have fun, bear.

I wish these bears woulds top trying to eat my limbs...

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Roy Hunter
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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby Roy Hunter » Fri Oct 29, 2010 10:19 am

Granted. They roll you over on your back and start eating the soft bits around your belly instead.

Nom nom nom!

I wish my damn parcels would show up!

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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby Qwertyuiopasd » Fri Oct 29, 2010 10:28 am

Some scrappy 10 year old Japanese kid with an electrified, yellow rat comes to your office with the parcel, and inside is this weird purple and white ball that opens in half on a hinge, with a big M on it.

I wish my roommate didn't back out of giving me a ride to the train station just now.

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Ubi Dubius
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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby Ubi Dubius » Mon Nov 15, 2010 9:41 am

Granted. He gave you the ride even though his brakes had gone out. You boarded your train a bit earlier than usual!

I wish to hear some good news today.

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Elvalia
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Re: Corrupt a wish.

Postby Elvalia » Sun Nov 21, 2010 10:53 am

Granted, you hear that the Toronto Maple Leafs stopped sucking. Unfortunately it isn't true...

I wish that Christmas would hurry up and come, I'm getting antsy!
TwistedSister wrote:El is everyone's buddy. :lurk:
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